Christians have you noticed this about some of your g*y freinds?

Question

Sometimes they seem sad and without me even saying anything they start confessing how they feel their life is wrong.That being g*y is wrong but they dont know what to do or how to change their feelings.This happened the other day.We were not talking religion and suddenly my one freind says alot of people assume Im an atheist because Im g*y but Im not.What should I have said? Years ago I had another freind that suddenly said something similiar.I dont think they are happy with their lifestyle or comfortable even though they put up a good front.The are both great people though.

Answer 1

Yes, I have. I hate it when it happens because it's a situation where I can so easily say something to scar someone badly. I have Asperger's so I frequently say the wrong thing, no matter how hard I try not to. I tend to think s*x isn't nearly as important as so many people seem to feel, but then I don't like to be touched either. Mainly I will reiterate that God judges a man's (or woman's) heart and encourage them to wrestle with God about the issue. I really don't feel qualified to say something like, "Oh, it's okay, God loves you anyway." nor do I feel like I can honestly say, "You're doomed to h**l." I simply don't know. I think ultimately, it is between them and God. And then I pray that God makes His will crystal clear to that person, whatever it might be.

Answer 2

More Christian c**p. "Oh, all non-Christians MUST be depressed!"

I can't even count the number of Christians who have pressured me to 'confess my inner sadness' and admit to my 'true desire to be with a man'.

You're not g*y. You're not an atheist. You don't know what you're talking about. You are making a fool out of yourself.

I used to be a Christian, and I tried to kill myself twice because people kept telling me being g*y was an abomination, disgusting, perverted, etc. and that Jesus would cure me if I prayed. I prayed for two d**n years and he didn't do anything. My family thought I was sinful, and so did the whole neighborhood. Do you know how awful that feels?

It was only when I left home, and left Christianity, that I accepted myself and suddenly became happier.

Answer 3

I think what they are unhappy about is that they are not truly accepted by their community.  The idea that they seem to have to choose between their sexual identity and often friends, family and community.  How would that make you feel?

Answer 4

I don't think it is necessarily that they are unhappy with their lifestyles.

Here you have people who's minds and personalities are telling them one thing, and they are feeling that it is right, but society and their religion is telling them they are wrong and bad. It can be extremely confusing.

When they say that their life is wrong, yet continue with it, that is a sign that they are torn between what they really want and what society wants them to want. They might even believe that their life is wrong bc of what their religion has taught them and yet they can't get rid of the feelings they are having.

Its like you said, they do not know how to even change their feelings. They don't know who to talk to, since everyone wants to "save" or "change" them.

The only thing you should do is be supportive. Whether or not they end up g*y in the end shouldn't matter. Don't try to change them, or reinforce that they are being bad. Keep telling them that you don't care and it doesn't matter what they choose, but that it is NOT ok for them to go around pretending they are something else. If they are pretending not to be g*y and that is making them sad, that is no way to live life.

Answer 5

It seems to me you're hearing what you want to hear.  When a g*y person is expressing sadness about that situation, you have to look at the cause.  The cause is not because God created us as g*y people, it's because we are surrounded by homophobia.  Often, those promoting the anti-g*y agenda will insist that all g*y people are sad and miserable, because we are g*y.  But if our moments of sadness relate to our sexual orientation at all, it's because some of those who choose the heterosexual lifestyle treat us miserably and try to take away our civil rights.  

Think of a woman during the time women were not allowed to vote and did not have the same rights as men in the US.  I'm sure there were women who had moments of sadness and wondered why they had to deal with this treatment.  Was it because their gender was sinful and they were not really happy with it?  No.  It was because of the treatment they received from bigoted males and society.  It's the same for us today.  The treatment of g*y people makes us sad, not being g*y.

We are told that we will know them by their “fruits.“  The fruits of homophobia are pride, ridicule, lies, reviling, prejudice, discrimination, unjust laws, hatred, bigotry, firing people from jobs, attacks, bullying, violence, suicide, destroyed lives, murder of g*y people and utter disregard for Christ‘s commandment to treat others as we want to be treated. ["A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit." (Matthew 7:18)]

Answer 6

I'm Bi, and I've been a Christian for over 20 years. It's not about being right about everything, it's about trusting God through Jesus Christ. We who are persecuted by so many Christians are exactly the kind of people God has grace for. The Christians who tend to appear that they have it all together can be just like the Pharisees of Jesus' time. And I think He notices that.

Your friend, if he or she wants to be a Christian, can be a Christian.  And Jesus spoke of a special curse that are just for those who would block them from coming to Christ.

You can e-mail me about this if you want. Also, if you want, you can watch my video and hopefully you will think it's worthwhile to pass on.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RA-Z4qZyI...

Answer 7

answer: then you haven't met the hundreds I have, thanks. Maybe it's just the people you hang with who believe out of fear.

Answer 8

I don't have any g*y friends, but if u r a Christian, you should tell them about Jesus and why God created Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve

Answer 9

Your friend feels that his lifestyle is wrong because he is a Christian. He didn't choose to be g*y, he was born that way, and he believes in a god who calls him an abomination --the same god he believes created him. How could you not be depressed, when you are put into a position where you feel you were created simply to be hated.

EDIT: It is my sincere hope that all Christians soon put this into practice:

Matthew 7

1"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

The Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.