Colleagues ask you about how much you make?

Question

I work at a hotel and had just got back from my annual review. The guy I work with asks me if I got a pay increase. This guy asks me all kinds of questions and I know he is not my friend. He seems to focus on me and others instead of his work. I tell him I did not get a pay increase and he keeps saying, 'yes you did' with a smile. He knows I am the top performer. I never gloat but the jealousy seems to be there. This drives me nutts. He seems to doubt most of the answers I give him so why does he ask? When I finally told him my boss told me not to discuss our meeting he backed off quickly. How should I handle these kinds of nosy questions in the future so I can get him to back off quickly?

Answer 1

I just tell people that I don't discuss my finances.  My Dad always did it this way and I never found out how much he made.  Let people know it's personal and they should figure it out.

By the way, why is this in the "Mythology and Folklore" section?

Answer 2

when people come at me like that I tell them I make a paycheck, the dollar figure doesn't matter to anyone else but myself and I am certainly not going to risk getting fired for discussing it with them.  If they really want to know, they can go ask my boss.

If you don't want to deal with him send him higher up your ladder.  he won't have the guts to go there and eventually will stop asking when that's the only answer he gets.

This guy is obviously feeling very uncomfortable and has no self esteem.  He needs this infomation to validate his own paycheck and to give himself a goal to work towards.  He can't find his own motivation within himself, so he has to use yours.

Avoid him if you can, he could also suck the life and energy right out of you.

Answer 3

Look him square in the eye and ask him, "Why do you want to know?"  That's always a good response when someone asks you about something that is intensely personal.

"I don't discuss my finances" is also very good, direct, and tactful.

The next step would be to tell this co-worker, "Personnel policies state that discussing salaries with other employees is grounds for dismissal."

And then, if he persists, go talk to your boss and tell him or her that this co-worker has an inordinate curiosity about your salary and won't drop the subject.