Controlling an addictive personality.

Question

The more honest I become with myself, the more I realize I have an addictive personality. Issues with all sorts of addiction run in my family, and I see it appearing in myself.

How can a person control addictions that they already have and curtail future outlets for addiction?

Answer 1

The root of all addiction is based in anxiety.  Anxiety is based in fear.  The etymology of this fear is very primal instinct for survival.  Think of the drug addict or alcoholic, or someone who is addicted to a relationship, food, etc.  What motivates the obsessive behavior?  The anxiety sets in because there is that instinctive moment that is just a split second where you fear that if you don't have that drink or that person in your life you will not survive.  Your body responds with sweating, nervousness, an comfortable feeling throughout your body, and does not go away until you take that drink, or what have you.

The trick to overcome this is to sit with it.  As excruciating as it might sound and seem in practice, you have to allow yourself to feel uncomfortable.  And do not ignore it by trying to distract yourself.  Focus on it.  Sit with the uncomfortable feelings.  And wait until it passes.  It's very hard in the beginning, but be strong and it becomes easier, and with each time you allow yourself to experience the anxiety and not give into it the time will become shorter and more bearable until finally the anxiety goes away when you psychology realize that you can survive these moments and you will not "die" if you don't satiate the anxiety.

This is an exercise that a lot of therapists use and works very well.

Here's a great quote from a great teacher, Pema Chodron:

"Compassion practice is daring.  It involves learning to relax and allowing ourselves to move gently toward what scares us.  The trick to doing this is to stay with emotional distress without tightening into aversion; to let fear soften us rather than harden into resistance."

Answer 2

Don't mean to kick you in the shins but being addicted to something means having no will power.

Answer 3

There are many self-help books available in bookstores for all kinds of addictions and emotional problems. Find one that closely fits you and your life style and follow the lessons and suggestions. You do have a choice about how you live and how you feel.

Answer 4

You've already conquered half the battle by recognizing these traits that run in your family. Invest your time in healthy activities. What interests do you have? Do you like sports? Then join a local sports team. Make sure you hang out with people who live a healthy lifestyle and you'll have most of the other other half of the battle won. Be very wary of people who want you to try things that you know will only get into trouble, eventually.

Good luck.

Answer 5

ok, addictions I would say plan you day and fill it with activities you know that you should be doing instead of just going with the flow. A schedule  is a good thing to have