Could I legally seek out my biological parents?

Question

I live in Virginia, and my parents adopted me when I was 8 months old. Now, I am 14, and I've been thinking about my biological parents. I think that I would like to meet them.

My adoptive parents and I have very good relationships with each other, and, if they agreed to assist me, could I legally seek out my biological parents, or do I have to wait until I'm 18?

Answer 1

Facebook them.

Answer 2

Your parents have your birthparents names, that's awesome, and more than enough to start on. Start with that and work towards finding out. Do get anything your parents may remember about them though. Like temperment and ages and little details.. It'll help out. Even if you need to call every Smith or Chong in the phonebook, someone is bound to know them.

Good luck kiddo. !

Answer 3

Talk to your parents.  If you can legally contact your biological parents your adoptive parents can open the way.  Don't be upset if you don't get the news you were hoping for.  A friend of mine finally met her biological parents a few years back and they were both mean nasty people into drugs and drinking.  Now they call her all the time wanting money.  I know not all cases are like my friends....just be careful.

Answer 4

having your adoptive parents blessing, and help will make things easier. understand a few things first;

1: there is a reason your biological parents gave you up for adoption, and you may not like it.

2: you may find your biological parents in a graveyard. so be prepared for that possibility.

3: you may have other siblings out there as well, perhaps even a twin.

if your biological parents gave you up because they could not take proper care of you, and wanted the best for you, then likely they will be hapy for you, and may be willing to open a relationship with you. if your bio parents gave you up because they didnt want you, they may not want to see you, and it may even be very difficult at best to get the adoption records unsealed. also be prepared to hear that you may have been a product of rape or incest.

as for your bio parents being dead, that is a distinct possibility to consider.

as for other siblings, also grandparents, aunts, uncles cousins, all can be found.

i pray you find what you are looking for, and i hope that you realize that your adoptive parents do in fact love you, and will be a huge help if things dont turn out like you hope.

Answer 5

I don't understand the problem, to be honest. Your adoptive parents have identifying information on your first parents and are willing to work with you to help you find out answers about your identity. Thanks to the web, you probably won't even have to leave your house to find info on your biological relatives.

In addition to your parents, it would be a good idea to work with a support group or an individual therapist specializing in adoption issues. There are so many conflicting thoughts and emotions that get stirred up, no matter what the truth is. You'll need help navigating through this journey. Joe Soll (Google his name) would be a good starting point for finding a therapist or group in your area.

Good luck!

Answer 6

I think a good idea would be to wait until you are 18 to start your search.

Answer 7

With your parents assistance, you may search at any time.  You are fortunate that they will help you search, and that is so supportive!

A word of caution -- don't go searching unless you can handle what you find/who you find.  Be realistic.  Your birthmother may be a hard working secretary, or a dancer in a bar.  Your birthfather may be a nice man who was in love with your birthmother, or an abusive man in prison.  

And, what if you establish contact, then they suddenly stop responding, or don't show up for a visit?  How will you feel?  On the other had, what if they are so great, and you want to be with them all the time?  How will you handle that feeling, as well?

  You are young, and may not be prepared on an emotional level for the results of your search.  Talk this over with your parents, and consider all the possibilities you can think of before you plunge forward.  

Try:  Tina's Adoptions Search.  This website will lead you through every step of searching.

Good luck to you!

Answer 8

YES YOU CAN FIND YOUR BILOGICAL PARENTS SO LONG AS THEY ARE STILL ALIVE AND WANT TO BE FOUND.

YOU ADOPTIVE PARENTS CAN HELP YOU AND ANY INFORMATION THEY HAVE IS GREAT.

JUST REMEMBER THOUGH YOU MAY NOT BE HAPPY WITH WHOM YOU FIND, THERE ARE REASONS WHY PEOPLE DO THINGS AND YOU ARE VERY LUCKY TO HAVE HAD YOUR BIOLOGICAL PARENTS TAKE CARE OF .

GOOD LUCK

Answer 9

If you have your adoptive parent's help - go for it.

Sure - you may find out things that may hurt - but that will never compare to finding out YOUR TRUTH.

A truth that only belongs to you.

I say - go for it.

And GOOD LUCK.

Answer 10

With their help yeah.

Answer 11

you are allowed to ask for that information anytime you want it. I would recommend you have the support of your foster family, but it is your right to know.

Answer 12

Yes, in most states that is perfectly fine.  In a couple of states, it's not clear if the rule is one by the state or just a policy of the agency (which is not enforceable, BTW).  However, be aware that many adoption search registries will not list you even with your parent's permission.  I found my son via his website, but I didn't even start trying to find him until he was 18.  It could be that your birthmom has no information out there for you to find.

Answer 13

Order your original birth certificate. It should have your mother's name and maybe even your father's name, too.

Answer 14

Since you are underage you will need your parents assistance. The state of VA considers an adoptee of age at 18.  Since your parents have their names they would initial contact or you can use a confidential intermediary to make contact between the 2-3 families.  This can be done through an agency or a private party.  Many search angels in the adoption community can do this for you for free as well as locate the current location of the birth parents.

Here is a link that explains VA access to adoption records laws.

http://laws.adoption.com/statutes/virgin...

Good luck

Answer 15

just hire a whole bunch of private investigators

Answer 16

I believe it will probably depend on your state rules at the time of the adoption as well as the type of adoption that you had.  I would highly suggest speaking with your adoptive family so that they can find out for you if it is possible for you to try to find your bio-parents at this age.  If so, perhaps the agency can help you.  Or perhaps you can send a letter (with your adoptive parents' help) to the agency so that they have it on file in case the bio family starts looking for you.  

Good luck.  But remember, not all bio families want to be found.  Don't get discouraged if you can't find them or if they are not what you hoped them to be.  Your adoptive family has loved you and they are your true parents.  :)

Answer 17

Ask you adoptive parents to help you do this.  I know how you feel.  I would like to my find my child also, but legally, the parents have to wait until the children are 18, so I have another 4 years.  If you can do it now, do it, before its too late.