Question:

Could i get some opinions on this poem please?

by Guest34053  |  earlier

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A Love Departed

you said goodbye for the last time.

her hopes fell like raindrops.

her heart was put on hold

and yet you wonder why shes like this.

why a smile is no longer seen past her rosy cheeks

why she locks herself in her room

crying herself to sleep everynight,

reliving every moment.

dont you get it baby?

the reason

is you.

she tries to forget all the pain you put her through.

she wants to let go.

but seeing your face.

your beautiful blue eyes.

makes her fall in love all over again

she cant stand the fact that you dont think about her anymore.

when you never left her mind.

but what hurts the most.

is that she let you walk away.

because she was too scared to lose you.

but in the end.

thats what happened.

now she knows.

that people change.

and life moves on.

but for her

letting go is impossible

its not a choice.

she cant help that when she said

she loved you with everything she had

she meant it.

13 minutes ago - 3 days left to answer.

Additional Details

12 minutes ago

say goodbye once more

and this time you know she will move on

this time she will let go

cause she wont let you control her anymore

she wont let the pain get to her

not again...

what do you think? be brutal if u have to. also

advice on how to make it better. well all my writing better. i want to continue writing but to be honest i dont think im all that good. so any tips on how to come up with my idea etc would be helpful thank you

6 minutes ago - 3 days left to answer.

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4 ANSWERS


  1. BEST POEM I EVER READ!!!!!!!! K!CKASS that means its AWESOME!!!


  2. that's a great poem

  3. I have just been asked to be brutal...Wow, I should grab the chance, lol. But no there is no reason cause I like it. Especially some parts. I think it is a good job. Keep on!!

    Please could you have a look at this?   http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

  4. oh! dear...it was soooo nice...though it's so lonesome...but it's your thoughts that counts.i personally love the poem...i do have a very little suggestion...on the 1st part if you maybe change that part so it goes like... "her hopes fell like rain", and "yet you wonder why she is like this".

    overall...your poem is good.i really like it

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