Could she be sick or just severe separation anxiety

Question

my daughter - who will be 1 on the 14th of this month - has been super clingy for the past 2 days.

she is NEVER like this, very independent, very content.

she just wants to sit up on my lap and cuddle all the time - which is NOT something to complain about, but when it comes to making her meals, tidying etc, its very difficult to do whilst holding her. she doesn't want on the floor to play even if daddy and me are down there with her. she will let me read her a book, that's about it. she will play for about 10min then wont tolerate it any longer.

her daddy finshes work at 3pm. i thought great, i can get a break - go for a shower (as i wasn't able to with her wanting cuddled) but she wouldn't even go to him.

i gave her ibuprofen about 5pm last night because i thought her teeth may be bothering her, but she didn't get any happier.

she doesn't have a fever, isn't vomiting / diarrhoea, she isn't over sleepy, still eating, drinking, and having wet and dirty nappies. so I'm reluctant to take her to the dr as i cant actually say anything is *wrong* with her.

Answer 1

I agree with MMT. Just let go with her cues. It would be nice to always know exactly why our kids do something. But that's impossible. For some reason she needs some extra hugs. Let the housework get behind for a while, do only what needs to be done, like meals, and make something easy that doesn't require too much time.

Give her all the cuddles she needs, and keep an eye on her. She might be coming up with something, or teething.

Or maybe she just wants some mommy time. ( I hope this is it )

Maybe hubby can take care of something else since she won't go to him. Like the dishes, or a simple meal.

Hang in there. I know this can be exhausting. My little one wants to be held all the time. I do enjoy the cuddles though. :)

Answer 2

My litttle girl usually gets like this when she is coming down with an illness so I would just keep a close eye on her for the next few days just incase.

It may just be her teeth as my little one was fine with teething until the big ones started to come through.

Answer 3

It is a known thing that babies get clingy suddenly around that age, although it does sound a bit extreme in this case.  It still could be teeth as the first few pop through with no trouble but it's the molars or "double" teeth which cause all the pain!  Does she wince if you put your finger in her mouth?  You might feel if the gums are swollen etc.

Hope she's OK soon!

Answer 4

Babies as young as six months old can show signs of separation anxiety. They might cry when a parent leaves the room and become very clingy - for most babies this is a normal phase. However for a few babies, separation anxiety goes on for years causing frustration and bewilderment for parents and carers.

There are various theories about why separation anxiety occurs, but the following explanation appears to be the one that most pediatric specialists agree upon.

In the sixteenth century all adults believed that if a ship sailed out of sight it would fall of the edge of the earth and be gone forever

A baby passes through many stages of development and at some point learns that a world exists outside of what it can see at any given moment. As adults we know that if our partner goes out of the front door they will be back. A baby has to learn this. So the red face, gut wrenching screams and tears are testimony to the baby's instinctive distress at losing you forever.

Separation anxiety is commonly seen in babies from six to twelve months and then again at eighteen months, this is normal and usually passes as their understanding develops. But there are games that you can play to support their growing skills.

Games can help to create understanding of a world outside of babies' vision

    * Peek a boo. A timeless favourite that gently and playfully introduces the idea that people can disappear and be there again. Lay the baby on your lap facing you. With a soft cloth cover your face or the baby's and then let it slide off - big smiles and the right noises are of course essential smile You can also do this by taking their legs and blocking their view of your face then opening them again so that they can see you.

    * Hide and seek. Lay your baby in the middle of a room where he can see you moving around. Then play Hide and seek behind sofas etc after you have hidden, talk to him or her, then show your face again. You can also put favourite toys out of sight and then find them together.

    * Practice what bye bye means. Say bye bye and wave then go out of sight and quickly come back.

A baby will often base its emotional reactions to new events on its parents'.

If your reaction to your baby's anxiety is more anxiety you deliver the message that this is a dangerous situation. So do your best to be calm and reassuring however your baby reacts.  

Answer 5

It's frustrating when you don't know what's going on!  But let her be your guide,  this might be a phase she's going through and will end shortly or she might be brewing something.  Just be patient and keep an eye on her just like you have been.  This might vanish when she gets up today or it might hang around for a couple of months.  Just hang in there!  

Answer 6

It's prefectly normal - and a phase - it should ease off in the next few weeks.  I learned to make spaghetti bolognaise with one hand during my daughter's phase!  Don't worry too much about it - just give her all the holding and cuddles she needs.  Once she is reassured that you'll be there when she needs you she should ease up.  Treasure it too - once they hit 18 months it's all about the daddy!

Answer 7

It doesn't sound like she is physically ill to me - and as her mother, you would know if she was ill.  My daughter has occasionally been more clingy when she has been teething, and sometimes I haven't known she is teething either because it has been at the stage where they are still not breaking through the gum. Also, some teeth cause more problems than others - namely, the big side teeth and molars.  Separation anxiety is known to commonly happen at about 10 months, and again at about 18 months, although of course, all children are different.  In case you didn't know, the reason it happens is because at the age of about 10 months, children start to develop an understanding of 'object permanence'.  So in other words, when you leave the room, they know that you still exist, in another room or whatever, and it upsets them that you are not with them.  When they are younger, and you leave the room, as far as they are concerned, when you are not in their sight, you don't exist, because their brains are not developed enough to remember things that are not in front of them.  My daughter went through separation anxiety at both these stages, and at the time I worried that she had become a very clingy child, but it lasted no more than a couple of weeks and then she went back to being more independent again.  So, although it might be tough now, you can take comfort that it's a good sign her brain is developing!

Answer 8

She might be coming down with a cold, Heidi is much more clingly and only wants me when she's ill.