Could somebody critique this poem please?

Question

I worked really hard on this so I would appreciate it if no one tries to steal it. I didn't want to post this because I'm kind of paranoid about copyright, but here it is:

Meet Me in the Middle

I’m standing on this feeble bridge wond’ring if you’ll ever start

The journey from the things you want, my dear, you must depart

I can’t walk any further now, you have to do your part

I fear this weight will break the planks, this wait will break my heart

I’ve made some changes for the worst, my darling, don’t you see?

It’s time for you to make changes for the better, love, for me.

But you don’t know how to listen, and you don’t know how to try.

You don’t know how to love or care, you’re leaving me to die.

There's more, but no room. I'll try to post the rest.

Answer 1

i think it was great, and i like how you used a bridge to show how you cant hold on... Um, the only thing i see wrong with it, in my opinion, is you used the word darling too much, i would try adding in different words in its place instead of using the same word every time, other than that this poem was great, and had a lot of emotion behind it....

Answer 2

That is bloody brilliant. I love it. You really have a rare talent, wow!

Answer 3

This is really pretty.  The only critique I can give would be for you to put all of the verses on a seperate index card and work on the flow a little.  Some of the words make your tongue stumble.  All in All this poem is beautiful.