Question:

Could you please correct this English message for me?

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** Please go ahead if you need to re-write this to be sound better **

I left an voice message on a loywer office.

" Hi, this is HN that you met yesterday. I asked my husband to come together today afternoon. He said that he prefers to visit your office tomorrow but today / not today. (Can I just say "he prefers tomorrow, not today"?) So. I'd like to make an arrangement tomorrow at 5 pm, would you mind? Please give me a call when you get this message. Thank you.

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I left an voice message at a lawyer's office.

" Hi, this is HN, we met yesterday. I asked my husband to come together this afternoon. He said that he would prefer to visit your office tomorrow and can not make it today. I'd like to reschedule for tomorrow at 5 pm, if you don't mind? Please give me a call when you get this message. Thank you.
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no.
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I left a voice message on a lawyer's office.

"Hi, this is HN with whom you met yesterday. I asked my husband to come with me this afternoon. He said that he prefers to visit your office tomorrow rather than today. If it is possible, I would like to make an arrangement for tomorrow at 5 o'clock in the afternoon. If you would please call me back when you get this message, it would be greatly appreciated. Thank you kindly.

One thing you want to keep in mind is that when you are leaving a voice message, make sure you restate the purpose as to why you called, and state your name and number so they can return your call. Ps, you sound more eloquent in your speech when you do not use contractions.
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Good effort, Sally.  Changes in ALL CAPS

Hi, this is HN that you met yesterday. I asked my husband to JOIN US IN OUR MEETING today. "he prefers tomorrow, not today" So. I'd like to make an APPOINTMENT tomorrow at 5 pm, would you mind? Please give me a call when you get this message. Thank you.

All I would add is to leave your phone number.  The lawyer or his assistant may have it, but won't want to look for it.

Good luck with your lawyer.
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