Custody of a baby? Ex girlfriend is pregnant I due to her past, I would like to try to get full custody.?

Question

My Ex-girlfriend is currently pregnant. I understand that the state favors women to generally have custody of the child. In this case, the women who is pregnant has a very long history of mental illness. She was receiving state income for a while. She has attempted suicide at least 20 times. How can I get custody of the child when he or she is born? Will the state that her mental status in consideration?

Answer 1

The state doesnt favor women when it comes to a child they favor what is in the best intrest of the child. You would have to prove her mental state to be unstable and for her to be an unfit parent for the state to step in and award full custody to the other parent. The court process goes in steps it first starts with establishing Paternity are you the father or is there some other canidate that is. After that you would go back to court and establish a custody arrangement most states will awrad joint custody with residental custody to one or the other parent, again this is based on what is in the best intrest of the child. The best intrest of the child is not limited to the follow Money, housing, mental/physical illness. If she is receiving treatment for her mental status then the state wont go in and say that she is not capable of taking care of a child. Custody is very gray area and there is no right or wrong your morals and values may different from hers and the courts but they arent wrong. Good luck to you I hope this has helped you. The next thing i would advise is to get a lawyer to help you file all of the correct paper work after the child is born. Remember one thing, the child needs both parents and if you are just trying to ruffle some ones feathers and fight fire with fire it wont get you any where and in the long run it is the child who suffers. try to compermise you wont always get what you want and she wont either but the more you two work together on riasing the child the happier everyone will be the happiness of a child starts with the parents.

Answer 2

if you are a better caretaker for the child then yes, by all means, you can get full custody. if this women really is as "messed up" as you say she is chances are you will win in any custody battle, especially if there are papers/doctor reports on her mental state.

im not sure how to exactly go towards getting said custody being as i never had to do it but i think it starts with a lawyer? or if anything just contact a lawyer and ask them the details of that.

Answer 3

it will be based on her state as parent when the child is born.

Answer 4

You must prove she's an unfit mother to the state to obtain custody. if her mental illness impedes her to be a goodmother the state will (most likely) give custody to you. Once the child is born you are able to go to court and begin your custody case.

Answer 5

If you can prove that she is a danger to the child and you could prove that you would be a more fit parent, than you would be more than likely to have custody, which sounds like you can do very easily as I'm sure her mental history has been documented.  Depending on whether she puts your name on the birth certificate, you may have to (if she doesn't put your name on it) you may have to go to court and file to have a dna test done.  If she does put your name on the birth certificate, then you can file for custody right away.  Just because your male doesn't mean you won't get custody.  The state does favor women in regards to custody under normal circumstances, but if they have a history of mental instability, drugs, and/or alcohol abuse, it's more than likely the father will get custody.  Best of luck.    

Answer 6

She would have to "still be suffering from her mental illness". I know this has got to be tough on you, but really the best thing for you to do is just be there for your child as much as you possibly can whether he/she is living with the mother or yourself.  

Answer 7

Yes, you can probably get custody based SOLELY on her mental health issue, if you think she would be an unfit parent, then take it to court. Really, talk to a lawyer, it sounds to me as though you have a good case. I know this sounds S****y, but I wouldn't tell her, if I were you, that I planned on doing this, she could flee or something with the baby. But only do this if you TRULY think she could not care for a child. IF you think she could and you are just doing this out of spite, please don't.

Answer 8

Hire an attorney who specializes in family law.  Yes the state favors the women generally, but they will take the baby's wellbeing (and any potential endangerment posed by this woman's mental condition) into consideration.  You might end up battling for custody with one of her relatives such as her parents or siblings, which would put the odds more in your favor.

Answer 9

file a custody suit against her asap, and get a lawyer, and her history will come into play.  good luck.

Answer 10

You will need to hire an attorney to explain the full details of your case.  They will advise you if you can get full custody, but don't count on it.  Mental illness (unless severe enough to pose a risk to the child, like uncontrolled schizophrenia) is not always cause to remove a child.  Sounds to me like she has suffered from depression if she has been suicidal in the past.  The courts will not deem that as being unfit.  And receiving state assistance is also not a deterrent to keeping her child.

What you need to fight for is joint custody, with the child spending much more time with you than just the every other weekend type thing.  Fight for 50% custody, and maybe you can go for being the custodial parent.  Everyone may know the child is better off with you, but a judge isn't going to award you full custody when the other parent is willing to be in the picture, despite her problems.

Unless you can PROVE she is a danger to the child, you have to settle for joint custody.

Answer 11

yes, contact an attorney who deals with family law.  Certainly try to get sole custody.  If that wont work for you, then you can certainly get 50/50 custody.  I know a few couples who have children who spend a week  at moms and then at dad's place.  There is nothing that says one parent has to have sole custody.  The court may even try this while observing her as a parent.

good luck

Answer 12

Mental Illness alone is not reason enough for an individual to lose custody of their children, unless the courts deemed them a risk to themselves and their children. While she has a history of attempted suicide in the past, if she is making positive steps to recovery then the court may see it fit for her to maintain custody ( look at Brittany Spears!)  

If you really feel that she is incompetent and risking the wellbeing of her children you would need to go through the proper steps of proving that she is. This is a LONG process and usually doesn't work.

Depression, anxiety, ADD, ADHD, are all mental illnesses, and all things that can be handled with therapy and medications.

Instead of trying to take the child away, why don't you try to help your ex-girlfriend by maintaining a relationship with her. That way you both can raise the child and she'll feel confident in calling you when she's feeling down. Remember the saying, keep your friends close, but your enemies closer..

Answer 13

If you are the father, you can go to court.  Get a lawyer.

Answer 14

Yes i'm pretty sure the state will consider her past mental problems when deciding custody of the child.

Answer 15

Definitely hire an attorney, family law practice, that can assist you and answer all your questions.  Each state has a different law regarding this (and other legal issues) so it's best to hire a professional.  At best, you can call the American Bar Association who will put you in touch with an attorney from your area that specializes in this field.