Dark poetry. Care to comment?

Question

Click, Clack

Click, clack,

As the night nears black,

no need for one when guilt is your gun.

I’m going insane,

for the ones I’ve slain,

still remain to haunt and I haven’t forgot

a single face.

I cannot erase

these terrible thoughts deaf with gunshots.

Their fate sealed shut

with a silencer, from what?

Surely not their screams, and my guilt isn’t redeemed.

I’ve found you.

Oh, no, what have I done?

Trembling hands drop the gun.

Her crimson pools around as I fall to the ground.

Her blood holds my reflection

frozen in perplexion.

Her tears are my own, but the ones not shown.

I’m screaming inside,

but in whom can I confide?

I’m back.

You know suddenly it’s near

when all you can hear

is

click, clack,

as the night turns black.

No more.

Answer 1

Ouch.

Leaves little to the imagination, and in so few stanzas. Bravo!

Answer 2

Very dark and foreboding, but it was good. Kind of a in-the-mind-of-a-serial-killer type poem. Good job.

Answer 3

I really liked it it is very deep my favorite part is:

I’ve found you.

Oh, no, what have I done?

Trembling hands drop the gun.

Her crimson pools around as I fall to the ground.

Her blood holds my reflection

frozen in perplexion.

Her tears are my own, but the ones not shown.

I’m screaming inside,

but in whom can I confide?

This part was f'ing amazing

Answer 4

That's awesome (it feels great to say that!  Usually I can't ^__^)!!!

"I haven't forgot" should be "I haven't forgotten."

I love it.  Especially the first three and last three lines.

Answer 5

dude idk much about poetry but man that was awesome!