Daughter lied to get another girl in trouble on purpose?

Question

My daughter, well I don't know what, she is a good girl, but good girls arn't manipulative little things who purposly lie to get others in trouble. My daughter told that another girl stole something from her backpack, my daughter went so far to put the item in the other girls backpack. My daughter is 10 she knows that this is unacceptable. The poor girl got a good paddling from the school ( still legal in Texas), and got a sound spanking from her parents. And to top it off my daughter lied about this to me when I asked her. I overheard her talking to one of her little friends, I made her go over and apologize to ther girl, but now what?? It just amazes me that my daughter does not have conscience this happened on Friday and she was able to carry on life just as normal.

Answer 1

You know what, i say spank you daughter for lying to you. Not so much for getting other girl in trouble but because she wasn't honest with you, as for the other girl it sucks her parents don't trust of believe in their kid enough to take their child's side in the matter. You daughter should watch what she does, if another girl had done this to me she'd be getting a hair cut (gum in hair or glue) something else horrible.

Answer 2

I would speak to the teacher that gave the other girl a good spanking.. and i would ask for the same thing for my daughter for lying.. especially if the other girl got 1.. Hmm thats not nice.. i would also give my daughter a good spanking *i don't like hitting a child 1 bit and am against it* But since this is the punishment the other child got.. my daughter should get it too... i would also take away something my daughter likes and until she can show me she is sorry she wont get it back.. it wasn't a nice thing to do. I would also explain that this is the punishment you recieve when you lie.. and if she wants to be a bully then she will definately recieve this punishment. I would make her apologise to the girls parents as well.. she will feel a bit humiliated and maybe next time she will think twice.

My daughters 2 years 2 months.. and she's starting to lie *little lies like.. mummy daddy said a naughty word, he needs pepper or smack bottom or time out. I explain to my daughter because she lied and daddy didnt say a naughty word she can go to time out.

Answer 3

Since it is legal in Texas, why don't you give her a good spanking?

Answer 4

As I parent myself, I would be absolutely mortified if my child did this because I would hope they would know better than to behave like that. But, I also know that you can raise your kids to know right from wrong, and they're still going to make stupid decisions. What happen was not your fault, but you need to discipline appropriately. Your daughter needs to understand the consequences of her decisions. I suggest grounding her or taking something away that she really enjoys for one month. And she needs to apologize to everyone - the girl she accused, the school, etc. She's only 10, but make her accountable. Good luck!

Answer 5

Rather than councelling try punishing her with everything you have...no friends over, no parties, no sleepovers etc

Answer 6

Definatly she should see a long punishment as well as maybe give her a dose of her own medicine later on this week or soemthign plant her with something of yours and ask her if shes haves it and when she says no seach her for it ifind it and punish her as if she had taken it

Answer 7

I think you should talk to her about this and ask her if she feels bad at all. If not tell her that's not normal. Otherwise she seriously needs help. This could get worse.

Answer 8

I agree with the people who said that she needs to get the same punishment that the other girl got (and probably a more severe punishment).  But I would also make her give that girl the thing she accused her of stealing along with a letter of apology.

Answer 9

Don't be pushy, but sit her down and ask her why she thinks this is okay, and calmly get her to understand that what she did was wrong but you still love her and know she'll do the right thing in the future =]

Answer 10

She needs to do much more than just apologize to this girl.  She must be made to take real responsibility for what she has done. Make her go to the girl's parents and tell them personally what she has done.  Make her do the same thing at school.  She needs a punishment that suits the crime as well...a good paddling just like this poor girl who didn't do anything to her got.  

I think you are right to send her into therapy.  For her to not feel bad about this is not only abnormal, it's pretty creepy.  I'm also concerned about what sort of friends she is hanging out with...why would they not be mortified when she told them what she did?  Get her away from these kids if they think this sort of thing is funny or cool or something.

Please take her to therapy.  Something may be wrong here.

Answer 11

I have done that before so for me its normal. But i have always had a reason, like maybe they did something 2 me b4 and im just getting them back. i have 2 admit doing it 4 no reason is kinda weird.

Answer 12

The first thing is you made her go apologize to the girl but she needs to stand up in the class and apologize to her in front of the teacher, the principle and all of their peers.  It was embarrassing for the girl to get into trouble so let your daughter be embarrassed when she has to admit the truth.  Next I would make her sit down and write out an essay on what she did, why she did it and why it was wrong.  Then I would ground her and take away all tv, pc and phone rights for a week as well as extra chores around the house.  I would talk to the other parents and see what punishment their daughter got other than the spanking and that would also be applied.

Right now your daughter got caught and to her it is no big deal.  If you just spank her then it is done and over with and again she can forget all about it.  She needs a punishment that is going to make her think about what she has done over and over so that she can't just brush it off and go on about it like it never happened.