Depersonalization, What is it?

Question

Can someone please explain what depersonalization is and can you make it easy to understand. My therapist asked me about this and I did not really understand what he was saying or what he was trying to figure out and I told him I didn't know and then I asked a question and we got off track and never got back to this depersonalization thing.

I will try to give an example of what I think it might be by past experiences.

I can remember times when I would be in my room and be very upset by something that had happened. I can remember crying and self-harming and looking in a mirror, I would concentrate on looking deep into the mirror and into my own eyes and not recognizing myself and asking who I was. What is that all about? I can remember doing this on several occasions in my childhood and throughout my adulthood when I am under loads stress, very anxious and depressed and during times when I would self harm. To me it almost seemed as a psychotic "crazy" thing. I can remember doing it, but at the time it feels like its weird and now when I think back about it sometimes I don't understand why I was so upset to do it. I endured a lot of abuse when I was growing up, physical, emotional and sexual, I don't remember the sexual abuse, but my mother told me that my father was caught in the act and my older sister says that she remembers it. Now that I am older, I can't remember what happened that was so devastating to me to do something like that. My sister and I never received any kind of therapy for the abuse, we just endured it and it was really never discussed mainly, because my mother would never admit she was just as much part of the problem when it came to emotional abuse and physical abuse. We were just expected to get over it.

Answer 1

Keep seeing your therapist (in my opinion it should help you in the long run if you let it hopefully). Depersonalization the only way I can simply describe it is that you or someone feels 'unattached' or disassociated' with something. You pretty much described a few examples aboved. Things happened that involved you and you were seperated from them in a way, kind of as an observer. Reasons it may have happened? Your therapist can help you a lot better on that but we all have different ways we deal with things in life and the only one that chooses who and how it is dealt is yourself.

Answer 2

well based on the information you gave, you basically havent really had anyone to look up to, to know how to handle things under stressfull situations. I mean you even said that your mother even took in on the act of emotinal and physically abusing you... and didnt even realise that what shes doing was wrong.. so judging by that I can only conclude that she was never taught how to controll her behavior understressfull situations as well.. and it seems to be this spiral patter with your family. Councelling is definitly recomended...and I think it would benifit you because having someone to talk to about this and help you move on with your life can seriously have a HUGE impact on the way you see the world and life... even if your family chooses not to go do this for you... WOw my bad i didnt see the part where you said you were in therapy... ok well your therapist should have elaborated more on what it means..

here is what i found based on wikipedia :

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depersonali...

Depersonalization (or depersonalisation) is an 'alteration' in the perception or experience of the self so that one feels 'detached' from, and as if one is an 'outside' observer of, one's mental processes or body. A feeling of watching oneself act, while having no control over a situation.[1] It can be considered desirable, such as in the use of recreational drugs, but it usually refers to the severe form found in anxiety and, in the most intense case, panic attacks. A sufferer feels that he or she has changed and the world has become less real, vague, dreamlike, or lacking in significance. It can sometimes be a rather disturbing experience, since many feel that indeed, they are living in a "dream."

so basically its a form of anxiety and not being able to controll or know how to handle stressufll situations... again your therapist should be helping you with that... talk to him about it and tell him. He is there to help, dont be afraid to ask questions.

Answer 3

ask your therapist next time, he would have the best answer, he knows you and probably had a reason to ask you.

What I know: Depersonalization is a dissociative symptom, there are a few others, that I don`t remember. Dissociation is a reaction to a dangerous situation, it happens when you can`t run away or fight, like with children who is experiencing abuse. It`s like the brain is shutting of to protect you from that horrible experience.

looking in the mirror and not recognize yourself is a typical symptom of depersonalization, It has happened to me a few times.

also a feeling of watching everything from a distance.

sometimes I feel like I don`t exist,just my surroundings, I think this is depersonalization too.

people with an dissociative disorder often self harm, to try to feel real

( this doesn`t work so don`t try it!!!)

when you were abused in your childhood, depersonalization and dissociation were necessary, when the threat is over it becomes a problem.

dissociation often happen when children are experiencing terrible thing and is alone in handling it, like you and your sister.

sorry if my english is bad, it`s not my first language.