Depression, and I can't stand it?

Question

I am so depressed right now. I am always depressed. I start school at 9:00 A.M. I can't get any sleep because of my depression. I am crying right now, and i seriously dont know why! I think im a nut job or some **** cause i keep having flashbacks of horrible c**p that happened to me and my family, and that makes me bawl even more, im only 14. I dont know what to do with my life.. i dont live with my mom because of a past problem, and it kills me, but she lives up the street from me, and i see her everyday, but I feel like it isn't enough. What's really going on? How do I stop this?

Answer 1

hey there hun calm yourself down 1st and take a deep breath and slowly exhale. I mean that in a nice way. I won't be much of help to all that is  going  on with you but it does sound like u are having what they call Flashbacks. They can be very scary when it happens and very sad that u will cry I don't blame u for the way u feel even if I don't know your history and as far as not being enough with your mom living right down the street well it isn't u want your mom hun and I am so sorry u aren't with her right now. can u get sum help at school? like a guidance councilor or a psychologist? they can be a very big help to you right now since your mom isn't with you right now hun.I would talk to a professional if I were u sweety they will lead u on the right path and also lead u to the path of healing.Believe me your not a nut job so if u can please stop putting yourself down you are going through allot right now and it sounds to me like u really need your mom. U may have what they call PTSD but I am not a Dr. and I only say this coz of the flashbacks u mentioned u get because of horrible stuff that happened but there is help out there for that. Hang in there hun and get that help I mentioned ok? if u want to chat e-mail (check my profile) me and we can chat but only if u want someone to talk to. Good luck hun and I am sorry if this wasn't much help!  

Answer 2

'Sezbot' is right: you are not a nutjob.  Depression and flashbacks are symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and you can get treatment for this. If the 'horrible c**p' happened to your mother as well as you, then she is probably suffering too.  Tell her about your symptoms and get her to take you to a doctor.

You can't cope with this on your own, nobody can, and you shouldn't be putting yourself down. You're just a normal kid and things will get better soon, you'll see.

Every school should have a counsellor or pastoral care worker: if you're not sure what's available at your school, confide in a trustworthy teacher.

Answer 3

Hey!  I too have depression so i know how you are feeling.  I think the best thing you can do for yourself is to get some help.  By this i mean contacting your school councillor and talking to them about it.  This is exactly what i did and they were able to refer me to a psychologist (which was completely free).  You are definitely NOT crazy or a nut job, you are going through a difficult patch in your life and it sounds as though you are struggling to cope with past experiences.  It would be very beneficial if you talked to a councillor about these experiences because they will be able to help you cope with them.

Talking about these things will remove a huge weight from your shoulder and you won't feel so overwhelmed by everything.  They will be able to help you identify stressors, help you deal with past experiences and offer you some methods or techniques to help you cope with your depression.  Seeing a psychologist doesn't mean your insane - people see them for a number of different reasons including how to handle stress better at work.  They are very experienced in dealing with all sorts of situations and they will be more then qualified to help you through yours.  If it is any consulation, my mother was physically and sexually abused throughout her childhood.  She saw a psychologist and they helped her immensely.

There is always help available for you, you just need to seek it out.  Don't give up hope that things will become better for you, because they will.  Maybe not straight away but they will get better and after this experience you will walk away a stronger and wiser person.  There are a lot of people in the same situation as you, you are not alone.  Please get yourself some help as it would be very beneficial for you.  You are not crazy or stupid to feel the way that you do, you are just very overwhelmed and haven't found an effective way to cope with past experiences.  Councillors can help you to do that.  I wish you all the best and hope that you feel better in the future.  Good luck!!