Depression, anorexia?

Question

i have sweeps of depression for no justifiable reason. like today, i feel so awful, i want to see my friends but this voice in my head is going 'you're a fat ****, they can't see you like this, why would they want to see you?' i get anxiety like you wouldn't believe. i'm also really upset about the fact that my boyfriend didn't come over last night when he said he was going to, i want to call him and i don't know why it's such a big deal for me but again it's the voices saying well he obviously doesn't want to see you, stop bugging him, he made his feelings clear last night. i make myself sound like a nutter, going on about voices in my head, it's basically anorexia, but it's overtaken my life, before i'd just hear it about what i've eaten, but now it's everything, constantly putting myself down for no apparent reason. i'm so sick of it. i know i need to recover, but it's not that simple, ive been through inpatient, outpatient, psychiatrists etc, it's been no help at all. i can't gain weight, it's like a mental block, i literally break down over it. i just wish it didn't control every aspect of my life. is there any way to control this? i'm not even bothered about all the weight and food issues, i've learnt to live with it, but i literally have no life any more, it's just taking everything away from me to the point where i want to die, i don't know what to do anymore

Answer 1

eat and shut up fed up with you lot keeping on all the time, if its not you lot it's "how can I loose weight in 5 minutes"

Answer 2

Okay well first off do your friends bf etc no about your anorexia? If not you should try telling them. Or the very close friends anyway. Tell them how it is and how you cant make the calls to see how they are or meet up with them. Maybe ask them to call in now and again to see you, so that you can still see them even though your having a tough time at the moment. As for the bf, im sure he'll understand you need him there for help. Explain it to him as best you can and tell him that the whole, being let down thing REALLY doesnt work well.

I read a book a few weeks ago. VERY good. Called the Mother and Daughter Diaries by Clare Shaw. I think it would be a good idea to read it as it sounds like the same situation your in.

Anorexia is hard to beat. But it can be done. Just try to keep your head above the water. You'll get through this.

If you cant tell your friends and bf Im afraid Im not too sure what to say except even think about letting one person know and asking them to include you in certain plans. Being strict with you and making you go with them. Its a lot to ask but if theyr good friends theyll do anything to help you through this hun.

Good luck, keep us posted <3 xx

Answer 3

EDIT: "BUILDYPUSS" hasn't got a clue what she's talking about, just ignore her ignorant comments...eating disorders are just like drug addiction/alcoholism except even worse because you can live without alcohol and drugs but you need food to survive so it haunts you every minute of your life!!!!!

Honey, I was the same as you for about 2 years then I got bulimic for about 5 years, which was (for me) 1000 times worse, that nearly destroyed me.

I was bingeing/vomiting anywhere between 6 and 14 times a day, depending on how bad I felt that day (the worse I felt, the more I'd do it).

HOWEVER I'M NOW OK!!!

It has taken me a long, long time to conquer this (and yes, I still have evil little voices in my head telling me I'm no good but now I'm far more relaxed about it and whenever they speak to me I just think "oh, **** off" and they usually do).

It has been a whole heap of things that have helped me get to this point, counselling, EDA groups, meeting a lovely man who has brought stability into my life (I'm not saying someone else should do it for you but he has helped me break the destructive, vicious cycle and take control of food instead of the other way round).

But, to be honest, I think the passage of time has helped me most, getting older and caring less about what people think has had a hugely positive effect on me, once you can learn to stop caring about others' opinions you can go easy on yourself instead of beating yourself up about every little thing

.

Another thing I did was to gradually force myself to accept that I could not be in control of everything- control is an illusion insecure, troubled and depressed people like you and I create in order to be able to cope, but all that happens is that these obsessive traits end up controlling you!

If you can try to accept that all sorts of things are going to happen to you and yours, good and bad, and nothing you do can change it, then it might help a little or a lot...but you have to repeat these things over and over again, it's like you've got bad patterns of thought embedded in your brain and now you have to rewrite the way you think but you must do lots of self help rituals, even writing yourself little (nice, encouraging, positive) messages about what a good person you are and you're beautiful and pasting them all over your room/house should help, because they start to sink in gradually.

I ferquently used to have panic attacks (thought i was dying) or feel terrible waves of fear washing over me, the sort that make you go cold and head starts spinning but every time you face this and then realise it didn't kill you after all you get alittle bit stronger!

Of course depression is very much a chemical imbalance so yes, you need medical help but I have tried lots of anitdepressants and the best thing ever (by miles!) is St John's Wort, I absolutely SWEAR by it and it is herbal so there are no side effects!!!

I have recommended it to at least 3  people and they all said thay feel so much happier now!

Please check it out!!!

And, if you live in UK, you can get in in LIDL for £1.50 a bottle, it's so cheap!!!

Take 3 of the LIDL ones a day (or take 1000mg a day if you try a different make).

What have you got to lose?

If you try it you might feel much better, if you don't then you'll never know...........

ALL I'M TRYING TO SAY TO YOU IS THAT I TOO WAS IN A DESPERATE STATE FOR ABOUT 5 YEARS, I SERIOUSLY CONSIDERED SUICIDE ON MANY OCCASIONS BUT MY SISTER BEAT ME TO IT...SO I COULDN'T DO THAT TO MY MUM AGAIN....THERE IS HOPE, IF YOU STICK AROUND AND SURROUND YOURSELF WITH NON-JUDGEMENTAL PEOPLE AND THOSE YOU CAN TALK TO ABOUT IT AND KEEP PRACTISING THE SELF HELP STUFF YOU WILL BEAT IT...AND YOU WILL FIND OUT THAT LIFE IS SO BEAUTIFUL....BE STRONG AND KEEP GOING, ONE DAY YOU WILL LOOK BACK AND THANK GOD YOU DIDN'T KILL YOURSELF AND MISS OUT ON ALL THIS WONDER....THERE IS ALWAYS POTENTIAL FOR HAPPINESS, EVEN IF YOU CAN'T SEE IT JUST NOW......x*x My thoughts are with you...if I did it you can too :o)

P.S. CALL THE SAMARITANS EVERY TIME YOU FEEL LIKE ****, THEY WILL ALWAYS LISTEN TO YOU.

Answer 4

You need to follow up with your psychiatrist.  Sometimes it takes a while to get medications right.  If you are suicidal you need to go to the ER.

Answer 5

Email me. I can try to do a step by step thing to get your life back. If you don't trust me fine, because I can only help you if you trust my methods.

Answer 6

try effexor it works anorexia is sooo hard to beat see your Doctor about the medication