Im Emma and im 16 years old , im going to try to include everything i can. Basically i think im suffering from depression , i dont exaggerate things and i wouldnt ask for help if i wasnt genuinely concerned. The majority of the symptoms of depression ( clinical ) is what i feel i have been experiencing for a while now. Feelings of worthlessness , everyone is out to get me , memory loss , concentration loss , daydreaming , suicidal thoughts , feeling sad all the time , crying alot for someone who nevers cries , complete lack of control over my emotions ( basically i cant stop or control my crying ) , the crying comes randomly and at any time , i often find myself if im left alone just thinking .. constantly about everything and immediately i start crying , i have lost all passion , enthusiasm and motivation in my education and hobbies , i stay in the house all day and do not socialise , i feel completely exhausted with life , negative attitude , i feel myself comfort eating , i am sometimes ashamed of myself and my family and think what i could have done to improve things , i get easily angry at everyone and in particular my sister because she is suffering mentally too i believe , losing all hope in everything , my life has always been pretty bad .. but then it got worse as my sister is suffering from ocd and that stressed everyone out , ive had to move school and this has disrupted my education and has left the staff and kids miserable , my mum has moved in with her fiancee and i feel like im losing the battle. I feel like im deteriorating in every aspect of my life and have in my opinion disturbing and awful thoughts about dying and i realise that i wouldnt have all of these symptoms unless there was something seriously wrong .. life has always been bad i guess .. and thinking about it .. in a sense .. if i turned out ' normal ' from everything i experienced it would be a miracle . I think ive included mostly everything and ive tried to create a picture of the way i feel. I feel like this has been building i guess , if anyone can relate to what im saying i would appreciate it if you took the time to comment , thanks.
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