Did any of you mommies have babies and husbands with colic?

Question

LOL. What I mean is our new baby has colic and so far I have dealt with it pretty well. I am a stay at home mom so I am with the baby 24/7. What I cant deal with is my husband whining. He works during the day and goes out with friends often so he at least gets an occasiional break. When he is home all he does is whine that he cant hear the TV or the trash wasnt taken out or the laundry wasnt done. He even whines that the grass didnt get cut...yeah, I just had a baby 2 weeks ago and I am supposed to get out and cut 2 acres of grass! Yeah right. I guess what I am really after is somebody to tell me that I am not alone. Does anyone elses husband make lots of unreasonable demands? Just because I stay at home all day doesnt mean I have loads of free time on my hands. Did you have to deal with a whining husband after your baby came home?

Answer 1

I was reading your answers and Tracy M is crazy!!! What does your husband lack of s*x (and she doesn't know tha the's missing out) have to do with not helping you with chores!? Just try to do your best and try explaining to him why you can't do things and what you need help with...if all else fails drag him to your check up and get your doctor to tell him you NEED help around the house. Best of luck!

Answer 2

My husband doesn't whine like that, i don't care if you stay at home and have a nanny and a maid he should not expect you to cut the grass.  You should put him up for adoption (your husband)

Answer 3

Don't feed your baby cow's milk.

Adults call it lactose intolerance. For all we know babies may also have it but they cannot verbally express themselves.

Answer 4

No, my husband was not like that. He always cut the grass, took out trash, and finished the laundry I didn't get to. That's just how he is. I'm sorry you are dealing with this big inconsiderate jerk after just having a baby. Ask a trusted sitter to come over so you can get some rest because you sound like you need it. Good luck!  

Answer 5

Hi  I feel very sorry for you because i went through that 21 yrs ago my oldest daughter had colic  so bad i felt like jumping out the window but my mother told me to bend her legs up and some times that helps i was told  colic  is just the baby has a lot of gas on their tummy or try this my grandma told me to do this put a peppermint candy in a bottle of water and feed them the water and something about the peppermint helps calm their tummy i hope that helps oh i am not sure what part of the house your dryer is on but i also put the car set on top of the dryer and strapped her in and turned on the dryer and it seemed to calm her too .

Answer 6

The only way to deal with it is to tell your husband exactly how you feel. I will never forget when my son was maybe 3wks old he had colic as well, it was maybe 1am and he was up screaming as usual. You know how it goes, no matter what you do they still cry. My husband walks out of our bedroom to tell me that he can't get any sleep with the baby crying and he wanted me to make him stop. Please, if I could make him stop don't you think I would have? I let him have it. After that he didn't bother going to bed before us no matter how little sleep that meant he would get before work and he kept his mouth shut about it. He still makes stupid comments from time to time like around 5-6wks he asked if our son was getting easy enough yet for me to get something done during the day as if I sit around eating bon bons or something. Anyway you are not alone but do let your husband know how you feel about the comments he makes. My neighbor has a 3 month old son and went through it all too.

ETA: I have had the same experience as Bec Lucy's Mummy. I pitch a huge fit, my husband gets up off of his butt for a couple weeks then it starts all over again until I pitch another fit.

Answer 7

You're definitely not alone. We have a his, mine, & ours situation. 6 total. Ages 14 all the way down to 5 months & one of them has CP. He COMPLAINS constantly that things aren't done. If they are done then they are not done right. I ignore him & hand him the baby when he gets home from work. You are not supposed to even go up & down stairs for 4 weeks after you have a c-section so NO WAY should you be mowing 2 feet of grass let alone two acres. Good luck.

Answer 8

yes. been there done that. got worse when we had our second child. and as a result he left 2 1/2 years ago. he filed for divorce 1 year ago.....and i have to say, it's a blessing to not have to deal with his whining anymore! the kids have even begun to whine considerably less due to their dad being gone.

what it comes down to is that he really doesn't know what it is truly like to care for a newborn day in and day out. and from the sounds of it, he's never home to even notice anything about it. if you feel brave enough to chance it, leave him with the baby for an afternoon. let him start realizing what it's like to be a full time parent and hopefully get the clue that it is like having 3 full time jobs, 24/7, that never ends, you never get breaks, no vacation, no pay, etc.

Answer 9

LOL.... I love it! My daughter never had colic but after reading your question I now know what is wrong with my husband... the only problem is at least with babies it commonly resolves around 3 months... hubby is still "suffering" now that my daughter is 6 and a half months.

You are definitely not alone. They really don't realise how much work goes into looking after such a tiny being. I sat down and documented my day once (e.g. 6 feeds taking approx 45minutes each = 4.5 hours, 6 nappy changes approx 10 minutes ...(my daughter was a serial pooperlol) = another hour, changing clothes as well at half of the nappy changes = another half an hour etc etc )

It worked .... until the next time the dishes didn't get done!

Now... I tend to have a mini breakdown every couple of weeks and hubby realises that he has to do something. He does for a few days and it starts all over again. He often says things like ... leave the dishes I'll do them. So I leave them and they don't get done for 3 or 4 days. I refuse to do them so each time I want to make something I have to wash what I need first.... grrrrrrr. Sorry this has turned into a rant from me :)

I guess the moral of the story is that you are definitely not alone. But try to get on top of it ASAP... maybe you can sort out your hubby's "colic" and not be dealing with it in 6 months like me :)

Answer 10

lol- that does sound funny.

But it sort of sounds like hubby might be having streaks of jealousy with the new baby. (not sure what the 1st answer meant) But jealousy does happen.

Try having hubby make a date with the new baby. Maybe he can take the baby to grandma's for a few hours or even just taking over at home for a few hours.

Parenting should be 50/50. Sounds like you need a break. In my opinion, garbage and lawn should be his job.

Best of luck.

Answer 11

Colic is the medical term for 'unexplained crying'.  There IS a reason for the crying, you need to find it.  Try Dr Harvey Karp's "The Happiest Baby on the Block" for awesome suggestions.

My husband whined alot...but it is still my job as the housemaker to maintain the house.  I use a lot of suggestions from www.flylady.net to get things done.  And with a sling, you most certainly can mow the lawn.  It might not be the best thing to do, LOL, but with a sling, there is almost nothing you can't do.

And give him time----men take much longer to adjust to being a father.  For you, it was 9+months, for him, it's truely been only 2 weeks.  Most men have NO idea of what a newborn is.  He has been having nightmares that this will be his life forever.  It went from fine and dandy to this crazy loud demanding bundle who doesn't give anything back in return for all it's investment....not to mention he probably hasn't had any s*x in awhile.....that really makes my man cranky.  Don't forget about him ;)

You didn't say you had a c-section, or that your yard is hilly, or that it's 100F.  So, don't mow the yard :)  If it were flat, 75F, and you had a natural birth, it would be do-able.  

Obviously your husband is clueless.  Doesn't make him a bad hubby or father, yet.  Can he go with you to your next doctor's appointment?  Has he read the discharge papers from the hospital?  You just had major surgery.   My husband was like this after I had a different major surgery.  He felt it was not his responsibility to help with the house, and I should get my friends and out of town family to drop their responsibilites and come help me.  I ended up with major complications, spending every night for a week in the ER for IV antibiotic therapy, and HE missed out on going biking.  Served him right.  LOL.

Tell the dude that if he wants you to heal and be somewhat normal again, you need to take 6 weeks off work.  And that's that.  (But still read Dr Karp's book; it could change a LOT).

Answer 12

YOUR NOT ALONE!! I came home with twin boys and also had a 4 and 1 year old and still hubby complained about the housework not being done!  

Its probably also a case of jealousy on your hubby's part, here you are home all day devoting your attention to the new baby while he's out working all day long! If its at all possible tell him you want ONE day off,maybe a weekend day and leave the baby with him, don't do any of the housework before you go out though and see what happens. Eventually when your baby settles  more  you will be able to get on top of what your hubby perceives as "your work" around the house and things will calm down. Good luck with it though.

Answer 13

Stand up for yourself and get the credit you deserve NOW!!! I'm by far not telling you to leave him but ask him if he wants to take care of the baby for a day while you get a break.  Also give him a list of chores that needs to be done.  If he's anything like my hubby, he'll refuse to do it and then tell him to quit his whining.

It'll get easier when your baby gets older and you, by far, are not alone.