Did he ask your father?

Question

Lat night my best friends boyfriend proposed to her and he asked her father for her hand in marriage and so did my husband. I was just wondering is it still a big thing to ask the father's for their daughter hand in marriage or is that a thing of the past? If just curious to find out because my husband asked my father.....

Answer 1

My fiance did ask my father for "his blessing" as opposed to his "permission", but I thought that was very sweet.

I had always expressed that asking my fathers blessing/permission was something I wanted my future husband to do because I am VERY close to my father (I'M daddy's girl) and I think it's important for your future spouse to have a good relationship/get along with my family.  I ma very close with both my and his family (I lived with his parents for a year in college), they are already like my parents.  Because I think it's important for my family to agree/approve of who I will spend my life with, I really thought it was an important tradition for my father to firstly know that I was going to get engaged, and secondly, be involved in the decision by giving his blessing.

I'm a pretty traditional girl when it comes to that kind of thing, but I know my father was very honoured that my fiance did ask him first, and in such a respectful way (he drove to my hometown to show my parents the ring and ask).

Answer 2

I think it is timeless for the man to ask the woman's father for her hand.

It is a show of respect. After all, he is stepping into the role of most important man in the woman's life, even above her father, and that is a big deal.

My fiance approached my dad about marrying me. In doing so he earned the respect of my dad, and even more admiration from me. :)

Answer 3

My hubby asked my dad if he could ask me to marry him. I think it's a nice, respectful tradition, but I don't think it happens a lot any more. So many girls don't have dads anyway.

Answer 4

mine did. however, it was over the phone b/c he lives in another state. i think people still do it for tradition. i doubt anyone ever actually gets turned down. lol.

please answer mine:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?...

Answer 5

Nope, he didn't ask.  Before I got engaged my parents and I got into a conversation about that kind of thing, and my mom thought a man should ask, but my dad (surpisingly) said that he thinks that is an antiquated idea and that I am over the age of of majority and I should be the one who is asked first, not him.  So, I repeated this back to my boyfriend at the time, and he didn't end up asking.  He was planning on telling them the night before that he was planning on proposing but for one reason or another it didn't work out.  But my parents were the first people we told that we were engaged, and my fiance even brought my mom flowers!

Answer 6

I would have been upset with my husband if he had.  I have somewhat of a rocky relationship with my father.

I am also a tiny bit feminist and feel like I made the chose to marry my husband . . . my father didn't have anything to do with it.  My dad escorted me down the aisle but I also did not want the phrase "who gives this woman" in my wedding.  I am not anyone's property!!

Answer 7

My husband did not ask my father.  I don't know exactly why, but I think it may have something to do with wanting the proposal to be a surprise.  Plus, my father wasn't transferring "ownership" of me to my husband, so asking for permission might have been a little weird.  I do like the idea of asking for a blessing.  And I don't know how my dad feels about that, I might have to go ask him.....

Answer 8

My husband didn't.  

Answer 9

It is sweet but very old fashioned. Long ago, men were expected to ask the girl's father. It was a very important part of a young man's upbringing and his respect to the girl's family. Most girl's would not marry if the father said no. You hardly ever heard of a young couple running away to elope. I am sure some did but not very many. Times have changed but it still is a nice gesture for the young man to do. My hubby asked my dad 39 years ago.

Answer 10

I think it's the right thing to do. It's shows respect towards the brides parents.  

Answer 11

My fiance asked my mom for her blessing, not permission, because he would have proposed regardless. But he did it because one, he needed a way to tell her what he was going to do, and two, my mom and I are really, really close, and have a unique bond, and he knew that my mom would really appreciate that.

Answer 12

i think that the girl has the right to marry whomever she wants BUT i also think the husband to be should inform the parents. not actually 'ask' but more like say, 'i want to marry your daughter' or something.

Answer 13

Its not absolutely necessary but its important because it shows that the family or couple to be will have the support and encouragement of the parents and it will only make the relationship stronger. If the parents agree, then that shows the the husband and wife will have support if they need it and that the parents like the other spouse

Answer 14

Yes he did I didn't think it was big either but apparently it is.

Answer 15

My fiancee asked my father the week before he proposed. I did not find out until after we got engaged that he was so nervous when he asked my dad. Not only did he ask him but when he asked that was the first time he had ever met my dad. I mean he talked to him over the phone and everything but as far as officially meeting him that was the first time. I thought that was really cute and traditional, which is the type of person I am. I can be very old fashion at times. Good Question!

Answer 16

He asked both my parents.  I also hinted to him that is something that I wanted.

I really don't think it is as big of a thing as it use to be.

Congrats!

Answer 17

Not sure if he "asked for my hand", but there was a conversation before he proposed.

Answer 18

yessss!! My husband asked my father 4 persmission to marry me before he proposed! It was the cutest thing everrr!!! <3

Answer 19

I would appreciate it if my boyfriend did, but I wouldn't mind if he didn't. It is after all, my life and I live it. I can get married without my Dad's permission, but I would like my boyfriend to have it!

I don't think it shows any kind of respect actually, I rather think asking the bride first is far more important! After all what use is her dad's permission if she doesn't want to marry?

I'd prefer him to ask AFTER he asked me. Much more respectful towards the bride but no offensive to her parents!

Answer 20

I don't know depends on the values of a person. If I get married I know my husband won't be asking my dad because I feel like that's my life & I have the right to get married without anyone's permission  

Answer 21

My fiance asked me first, but he did call my dad later and asked for his blessing. It wasn't out of tradition, but respect. I'm really close to my dad and my fiance knew that it'd mean a lot to me and my dad if he asked.

Answer 22

I've never known anyone actually do it. I personally think it's an outdated tradition, and wouldn't want my husband to do it, although I love my dad dearly.