Did he cheat on me or was it a lie?

Question

My husband and I have been going through some ruff times I told him something that hurt him that had been done before are marriage ten years ago, then last night he sits me down and say's, I cheated on you he told me this hole vivid story witch made me cry and I had to go out side to get air then he tells me it was all a lie? he just wanted to hurt me, would you believe it was a lie or was it a confession?

Answer 1

he cheated on u  my boy friend did the same thing wen i was Pregnet because we culd not have s*x  

Answer 2

It doesn't really make a differance its some sick Sh**.

Answer 3

i agree with nikki, that was a confession.  

Answer 4

No one knows the truth but him... But lie or not, he told you to play games with your head. What he did was immature and childish. You two should probably speak with someone and get all of that cleared up or it will be in the back of both your minds for a long, long time.

Answer 5

uhhh if it was my husband i could tell you, can you not tell if he was telling you the truth or not? ask your heart  

Answer 6

If it was a lie, it was a pretty mean trick.  A person who loves someone doesn't tell them such a thing just to hurt them.  My guess is that it was the truth.  

Answer 7

yes

Answer 8

I don't think something that happened before your marriage should have enough impact on him to make him want to cheat on you or lie to you about cheating on you.  What happened before your marriage should have nothing to do with him, at least from the amount of information you've given us.  Sounds like there is some insecurity in your marriage that *needs* to be resolved before you two cause irreparable harm to each other and your relationship.  I would seek professional help or talk to someone at your church, if it applies to you.  I can't answer your specific question because I don't know your husband but I would have serious doubts about being married to someone who would say something like that and then take it back.  To me, though, marriage is for life so rather than stray further from each other, get help now and start rebuilding what you have.

Answer 9

You two need counseling...regardless of it being true or not, that was an incredibly immature thing for him to do ESPECIALLY if it was just to upset you. What kind of creep is he?

Y'all need some help before it becomes a battle of who can hurt who more. That's not part of any healthy, loving relationship.

Answer 10

From experience he told you the truth and because you got really hurt he told you it was a lie but he feels better on telling you the truth now ... but i think he told you it was a lie to scare you and not to think different of him either way you both need to really sit and talk this is not healthy

Answer 11

It's a confession. If he told you the whole story that's a really elaborate lie to make up on the spot. And if hurting you is all he wanted to do, that's the dumbest possible lie because it put the idea in your head and now you'll always wonder and be suspicious. He cheated.

Answer 12

I think its true he cheated because why make up a story like that? He could have just been mad about your confession, and made you say sorry and sorry over and over. But it seems he wanted to be even with you, so he figured now was good time to tell you. Also, if he told lots of details, thats fishy too. When ppl lie on the spot, they tend to have to search for details quickly.  

Answer 13

I don't think the real issue here is whether it was a lie or a confession.  The problem is why would a man who took vows to you purposefully do something to hurt you.

If he cheated he doesn't respect you and hurt you.

If he lied it was quite vindictive and low of him, not the way a husband should treat his wife.

Was he trying to even the score or get back at you, and if so, is that right?

I think you and your husband need to sit down and try to rebuild the trust and love you once had. It's tough and I hope that you can do it. If not or if you can't then I wish you good luck.

It DOES sound like he's playing head games, control games. That is immature, not healthy and most of all abusive!  Perhaps you need to decide if being in this relationship is what is healthiest for you, and if you have any your children.

Hope it works out!  :)

Answer 14

It sounds like you two may need counseling.

I say that because why would you bring up something from 10 years ago that you knew would hurt him?  And why would he say that to you?  It's either true or he wanted to hurt you, too.  

Either way, the both of you have unresolved issues and you need to talk it out.

Answer 15

If it was a lie then that's still weird. Why would he go to such great lengths to hurt you. WEIRD.  

Answer 16

You should ask this advice at Jamrie.com

People on the website, should help you out.

Answer 17

It was not a lie. It was a confession and once he saw your reaction and how hurt you were he changed his mind on the whole confession idea.  

Answer 18

Couple of little kids.

Don't procreate. There's enough child in the both of you.

Fools

Answer 19

it wuz a trick. dnt worry. seriously wut guy that has a wife tell them that he is cheating on her??? && plus he just wanted u 2 feel wut u felt when u hurt him. i think u guys shld say srry to eachother.

Answer 20

It is probably the truth.

Either way he is a jerk.

Answer 21

He is playing head games

Time to separate

I would get away for awhile and try to put everything in perspective

Answer 22

Dont belive that how are you going to tell some one you love that you cheated,  then turn around and say it's a lie.It was a lie Love is not like that.

Answer 23

That's hard to say because he sound like a game player. He could of really cheated but then realized it hurt so he said he just playing and see now you are more worried and contemplating in your mind if its true or not. I know you just wanted to tell him whatever you did wrong  while yall was together but that was before you were married. Whatever you told him you should of keep it to yourself now a can of worms is open. He's wrong for saying something to you then switched it.It has happened to me before then I let it go because if its true then nothing I can do about it its done and over with. He just showed what he is capable of playing mind games now you worried anything he say is truth or lie. Ask him again if its the truth then whatever he tells you drop it and go on. I hope this is a learning experience for you.

Answer 24

Well if it is your story then you will know if he is telling a lie or something. You said something you said 10 yrs back he reminded you and what the heck you don't remember that. Well if it was your story that he said and you knew it was true that's why you should have cried, if it was a lie or something then why should you cry?

Answer 25

He was only getting even (lying to hurt you)  in the future don't tell him about your past sexcapades.. he had no idea did he?