Did you decide to only have one child?and why?

Question

i have one baby boy and he is 15 months and a half. i have reasons to have another one and reasons not. so to have another i want to be 100% sure and have no reason not to have another one.

it is a very hard situation.

i am soo worried about the future of my kids: slumping economy in the us, health insurance prices going up and lacking, global warming. yes maybe i exagerate but i love my son soooo much that i worry and care about him, his future kids, grandkids etc.

i really don't think i exagerate, because if i do then i wouldn't even take him overseas and fly in a plane etc being afraid it will crash.

i just think of how things have been going so bad lately and adding another kid makes me feel like i am not in control.

in the other hand i really want to be pregnant again and enjoy the PLEASURE of the kicks and being pregnant. enjoy birth adn taking care of a baby and all the joy that comes with it.

i am sooo lost so i would like to hear from you guys's experience.

thanks

Answer 1

whats your rush?

in a few years if you cant get the thought out of your head, have another one.

it would be just as hard with two as it would be with one

Answer 2

I worry...we all worry. Sometimes excessively.  It is not hard to do these days.  I am not having any more babies because I simply don't want to.  I'm pretty happy with one and to be honest that is all I can or want to handle.

I think the important thing is to take one day at a time, literally.  Focus on what is within your control and forget what is not.  As a citizen in this country you have a right and responsibility to participate fully, if you choose.  Not to get political but I think it is extremely important to stay informed and aware of what is going on in the world...keep yourself educated and pass it on to your children.  Knowledge is power.  Fear is the opposite.  You can't go through life afraid.  Teach your children to be aware and responsible and enthusiastic - this way they can handle most of what comes their way.  

I waited to have a child for these very reasons...I didn't want to bring a baby into such a "terrible" world.  But history tells us that most parents felt very much this way as well even 50, 100 years ago.  Their worries were very real and true to the times...just like ours.  It shouldn't stop you from the experiencing the joy of having children.  Just make sure that you are doing it for the "right" reasons and you're being true to yourself = fair to your child as a new human being.  :)

Answer 3

I am in a very similar situation right now.  I had 2 children, but my older son became ill very young (meningitis cause numerous health issues for him @ 5 months of age) and he passed away when he was 5 1/2 yrs, May 9, 2006).  My other son just turned 4 in April, and ever since my older son passed, I've been almost obsessed with his well being.  With the direction the world is going in (everything you stated above) plus the violence (and the random acts of violence scare me even more) I'm scared about his future in this world and am not sure if I want to bring another child into this world to worry and obsess about.  But I've had severe abdominal pain and found out that I have Endometriosis and have had 2 surgeries to deal with the pain and will probably have more surgeries in the future.  Reading up on Endo and all of the symptoms and side effects (one of the worst being infertility) and knowing that I am probably in the later stages and closer to infertility, that made me realize that I really DO want to have another child.  As you said, I want to enjoy being pregnant again, all of the different stages you go through, giving birth, having a newborn to care for, nursing and the connection you have with your infant from that, raising another happy, joyful child who is my shining star in the darkness, I want it all.

I guess what I'm saying is, if you were to find out tomorrow that you couldn't have children anymore, how would you feel?  Would you be sad but okay with it, or would you be upset because you know you won't ever experience it again?  Think long and hard before you make that decision.  

Good Luck

Answer 4

I have decided to only have one child for a long time. No main reason, just lots of little ones. I don't come from a very wealthy family and I want to give the best to my daughter. I work very hard for what she has now, and I still consider it very little. I will ensure that she has a fully paid college education and anything she needs in life (w/out rediculously spoiling her) and she will be fortunate enough to have plenty of kids without relying on the government for help. The only thing that bothers me:

She will be the only child to take care of the final business affairs and probably under a lot of stress when the day comes that something happens to my husband and I.

Answer 5

I have one daughter, she is 13 years old now.  I am just like you in the past, undecisive whether to give birth to another one.  Thinking of the tough job of taking care and grooming a child makes me drop the idea of having a second one.  I love my daughter as much as you do.  I want to give her the best of everything and do not want to see her suffer in the future (in terms of finanical) when I am gone.  Think hard before you decide on it.

Answer 6

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Answer 7

Don't have another child because you like being pregnant!

We waited 5 years before we decided to have another child. We didn't even think of another one till the first one was 4. I feel waiting was the best thing for both my children and me. The time we had together as the first one was little was priceless. Then the first one was heading off to school, I had time with the next one as she was little.

My kids are 6 years apart. And are very close to each other.

I think parents need to think more about having kids. So many parents I hear now saying Oh we can't afford that we have 4 kids. We don't have time...

Wait till your son is 3 or 4 before thinking of another one. You don't need to decide now.

One thing that made me think of having one more was a girlfriend who died young. Both her and her husband were an only child and they had one child. When she died, her son didn't have any Aunts or Uncles or cousins.