Did you have your first child in your thirties?

Question

I was 31 when my daughter was born and I am glad I waited. I think that I was far too immature when I was in my twenties to have coped with a baby. The trend these days seems to be with starting a family in your thirties as it takes longer to get on the housing ladder, etc. My Mum was 25 when she had her first baby in 1956 and she was told by her doctor that she was quite old to be having children, lol! Times have certainly changed! If you had your first baby in your thirties are you glad you waited till then or do you wish you had started earlier?

Answer 1

i'm 30 and I'm having my first in october.  I've been with my husband for 9 years (married for over 3) and I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.  We've had the luxury of spending our childless years together indulging in everything we wanted to do - we've completed our education; we've dined in fabulous restaurants, we've traveled from places as far as french polynesia to East Africa, we've settled into our careers,  we've bought a house and saved money and we can honestly say we are ready to start a family and there's nothing we want more now.  I know that in waiting, I won't have any regrets when we have our kids and hopefully we can teach them a bit more than if we started our family right away.

Answer 2

We had our daughter last December and I was 31, I actually wanted children very young and after a long wait and 2 losses we finally had our beautiful daughter, I like to think God has a plan for us and that's why we had to wait so long, Yes it does seem that a large number of women wait, and I do think it's for financial reasons, the world we live in now is quite expensive.

Answer 3

My first and only child was born last year when I was 39. She's gorgeous and healthy.

Answer 4

I was 31 when I had my daughter.  I wanted children earlier....we were trying for almost 4 years before we had her.

Answer 5

No I didn't I had my first baby when I was 26 and my second one month before I was 30, like your mother I was thought of as mature when I had my second in the mid 80's. I have to say I coped very much better with the second, I felt I was too young when having the first, but we are all different and I know many young mothers that would have put me to shame with their amazing parenting skills.

Answer 6

No, I was in my teens with my first and my second, one at 18, one at 19. They are so worth it, I don't need to be selfish immature and irresponsible like some people do at this age - not that there's anything wrong with it, I just prefer to have my boys :)

Answer 7

Most of my female friends had their first child in their thirties. The youngest was 24 and the oldest was 38.

Answer 8

I was 31 too! I had my 2nd at 35....I am also bizzareley, the youngest Mum at my daughters nursery! The others are all late 30's and early 40s. I think living in a high socio economic area has something to do with that though...they're all career women! In my 20s I was like a kid! My Mum was 16 in 1964 when she had my eldest sister...young but not unusually so at the time.

Answer 9

I was 29 when I had my own and only and now I am almost 40 and still cannot afford to buy.  I hope I grow up one day soon!

Answer 10

No, I had my son this past March, and I am 19 years old.

I wish I had my son when I was older, but I wouldnt change what has already happened. I just beat myself up about the fact that I am not in the right place in my life to make everything perfect and comfortable for him. I have to do alot of growing and maturing with him here, whereas I wish he came in to my life when I was at my best. I am in no way an immature person, but I am definitely not as wise and stable as a 30 year old. But we'll get there together, and enjoy every minute of it :) [corny huh?]

Answer 11

I was 31 when I had my daughter back in March. I still wish I would've had at least my first child in my 20s. Preferably all but it's good that we waited.

Answer 12

I had my first when i was 19, second 20 and 3rd 21 they are all now married the eldest has just had her first child at 33, the middle  had 4 children she was 18 when she had her first, and the last has none yet he is not ready so i expect him to be well in his 30's for his first if ever. But then the story goes on i re-married when my children were grown up after a 20 year marriage lost my husband now have 3 more children in my late 30's and early 40's they are now 10, 12, and 13 and i am still only early 50's so can still enjoy them and hopefully see them all to marriage or grandchildren. I don't remember receiving that medal you know or perhaps i'll get a private invitation to the nearest loony bin!!!  No really i would not change anything for the world.

Answer 13

No, I had my first child, a son, when I was 19 and I am very pleased that I did! I loved every second of motherhood and had my second child at 20, a daughter!

Answer 14

Yes, and though I had yearned to have a child since the age of 27, I agree that I did not feel ready to 'give it (the child) my all' before the age of 33.

However...as my children have grown (had a second, aged 36 years) I found it more physically demanding and exhausting than a younger parent might have done.  Also, my own parents were at a stage where they were not prepared to help out (they had already done it for my sister's family for 10 years), so the children - and I - missed out the support of active grandparents. I also found that there were fewer parents around with my experience, so it was an isolating experience.

Answer 15

First at 37, 2nd at 41 and 3rd at 44.  

I didn't necessarily 'wait' on purpose but that's how it worked out.  I am glad I didn't have kids in my 20's or even early 30's.... I would have been a much different parent.

However, I do wish that I was going to be around on the planet with my kids a lot longer.  I get a little teary realizing I may never see grandkids.  But you do what you do and make the best of your situation.  

Answer 16

My first child was born just a couple weeks before my 30th birthday.  I am glad I waited for the same reasons you mentioned.  We had a house and some money stashed away.   Also I had established my career well enough to effectively work from home for a few years.  I have no regrets because I enjoyed every moment of my 20s without feeling like I missed out on the freedom to travel, party, etc.

Answer 17

I had my first baby at 31.  As much as I struggle now with certain issues, I know it would of been much worse in my 20s when I had no patience.  I am very glad I waited.

Answer 18

I was married to my ex 8yrs, never having wanted children w/him.  Then at age 30, I met my soul mate, I suppose!  We both wanted kids together, so we married and started right away!  Had my first baby just one month shy of my 32nd birthday.  And my second baby came along just 19 mos. later when I was 33.  Sometimes I wish I could have started a little earlier, but I didn't find the right guy until after 30, so that's how it worked out, and I'm so glad. I definitely was too immature in my 20's to have a baby, plus, I got to enjoy plenty of time for "me" before I had children.  I may even have another in a couple yrs. (I'm almost 36 now).  

Answer 19

my dad was 30 when he had his first little bundle of joy.... ME!! :)

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