Did you skip any of the traditional stuff and regret it?

Question

We've planned to skip the garter toss, bouquet toss and dollar dance, but we are going to participate in the first dance, father/daughter dance, anniversary dance, wedding party dance and cake cutting. At weak moments, I consider cutting out some of it because neither my fiance or myself are lovers of the spotlight. Did you cut any of it out and regret it?

Answer 1

No, we had it all - well, not the dollar dance, but that's not traditional. Oh, and no cake cutting - we didn't have an actual wedding cake - we served a variety of cheesecakes and dainties, then gave out wrapped and decorated fruitcake at the end of the night.

Actually a regret was actually having the garter toss - I just went along with it, thinking we 'had' to -- but then at my niece's wedding, she tossed an embroidered hankie with chocolate kisses tied inside - and I thought that idea was much nicer.

Answer 2

I wish I cut it all out and just eloped. I regret every minute I spent on my wedding, it wasn't worth the trouble at all. Do what you like, it is your day, right?

(oh yeah, I am still married lol)

Answer 3

Dont miss out on anything even a little thing. You will regret it in future.. Just go with the flow and you'll see how much fun you had :)

Congrats!

Answer 4

I don't regret not doing the dollar dance.  We also skipped the father/daughter, mother/son dance, because my dad is was not there and my husband wanted to be sensitive to that.  My sister in law did a mothers and sons and fathers and daughters dance open to all the guests since she and her husband were not lovers of the spotlight.  People really liked that.

Answer 5

I skipped the garter toss and the bouquet toss. I consider the first one crude, and the second one sexist and pathetic, and I don't regret skipping them.

I also walked myself down the aisle. I love my parents and I have a great relationship with them, but I didn't want to be "given away", I wanted to willingly enter the marriage on my own.

We didn't have a large wedding party- just a MOH and a best man, and I let my MOH pick her dress. I also didn't decorate the chapel.

The dollar dance is kind of tacky. Fortunately, it's not traditional in my family, so I didn't even have to worry about having it.

We did have a father/daughter and mother/son dance because we knew that our parents would appreciate it. We also had the dance where the couple who has been married the most stays last on the dance floor. I guess that would be considered anniversary dance. It was a great way to honor our grandparents who had been married for 57 (mine) and 61 years (his). I don't regret doing those because our families enjoyed them.

Answer 6

ya i don't know about this one.. it can be alright to go in there i think.. people will really admire you because you're so different and people don't get to see that that often.. you may be very capturing and peaceful to the rest of us i think.. and that can only be cute

Answer 7

umm, im not married but i wanted to give you a fun idea on the garter toss if you do decide to have it.

i went to a wedding a couple of months ago and instead of just have the groom walk up to the bride and do the whole garter thing. they made the groom dance to here. they put on some really wild music, had the brides maids line up making and pathway to the bride who was sitting on a chair, and the groom had to dance to her and if the brides made didn't like it they sent him back to the begining of the path. in the end he ended up doing a belly slide to the bride. it was probably the best wedding i have ever been to and it was so funny. i think everybody left there thinking the same thing. i think if you do something like that you will look back at your wedding and remember how awesome it was.

just my opinion.

in the end its about what you like and don't like, do what you feel. im the kind of person who doesn't like the spot like but at the same time doesn't want to have a boring wedding, so i'll probably be a mess when i get married.

Answer 8

We skipped the garter toss, bouquet toss,  dollar dance, registering, having a bridal party, flower girl/ring bearer, etc.

I don't regret the things we skipped. Our wedding wasn't really a performance and I think a lot of those "traditions" are.

Answer 9

We are skipping bouquet toss, garter toss, dollar dance, wedding party dance..but we are including new ideas. we are having this special event where the band will tell all the married couples to come out and dance. as the song progress, the band will start dismissing the couples by the number of years they have been married. then the couple who's been married the longest will be the last one on the floor and we are going to give my bouquet and a bottle of wine.  

Answer 10

No. You do what suits you.

My husband is British and they don't have all these silly wedding activities (though they have their own "traditions" that he preferred to avoid just the same). It is just wedding industry peer pressure that perpetuates these traditions and we blindly follow it rather than be unique and ourselves. We picked what traditions meant the most to us and our style.

My husband and I married in an outdoor chapel (Maitland Art Center) and had our reception next door in the outdoor Mayan courtyard. Our wedding was elegant, full of laughter, and people having conversations where they could actually be heard. We played background music on an Ipod (attached to a personal stereo) and walked around and chatted with the guests before the champagne toast.

We had one dance, my husband and I, to our song and a toast from the best man.

The only cute thing we did for the guests was wedding favors (Christmas ornaments), bubbles, bells (every time somebody rang a bell the newlyweds had to kiss), and hand held fans (it was an outdoor Florida wedding in June).

I don't regret any of it. My husband and I had a rule that the only people who were invited were people who we both knew very well and who contributed to our love before the wedding.  Those positive people would truly be celebrating our union and the beginning of our future together.  We weren't out to impress anyone and we weren't out to give people we barely knew a free party, meal, and drinks at our marriage's expense.

Our wedding (ceremony, reception, wedding attire) cost us less than $5,000.  We threw wedding etiquette and expectations out the window and had a fairytale wedding worthy of our fantastic fairytale story.

The people who attended said they loved how it wasn't cheesy, but beautiful, with great food, service, and fun. They were shocked at how unique the venue was (pictures don't do it justice).  We were surrounded by intricate architectural beauty blended with the awe of mother nature.  How cool is it to be sitting at your reception under huge oaks dangling with Spanish moss, hearing birds sing, and watching butterflies flutter by. How cool is it to be married under those same trees at the base of a giant Celtic cross overlooking a tranquil stepping stone fountain.

So do it your way and you won't regret a thing!

Have a great day!  

Answer 11

I skipped all of the traditional stuff.  We got married in a Las Vegas drive-thru chapel.  Best decision hubby and I ever made.  Follow your heart, remember, it's your wedding, do what YOU want.

Answer 12

We did none  of the traditional stuff and  regret nothing! I got a few comments and raised  eyebrows from the more traditional family members  when  my HTB and I were in the planning stages  but in the end everybody  a good time and we were man and wife, that's all we cared about

Answer 13

This is my feeling on it - neither my fiance nor I are interested in being the center of attention. I actually will get sick to my stomach when all the focus is suddenly on me, so I know how you feel. we are including everything in our reception because we feel that we are going to enjoy our wedding reception once so why not do it all.

people say that it's your wedding and do it like you want it, but it's also for everyone else in your family. think about how your great aunt would feel if she didn't get a clear chance to catch the bouquet ... even though she's been married twice. do it for her :)

Answer 14

It's your wedding day.... do whatever u please..