Dilema with the dude...?

Question

I am currently talking to this one guy, but he's over in the States and I live in Europe. He seem nice fella (38 yo, havin a good house/job etc.. really seems like seriously interested in me).

He offered me to travel and visit him (he would pay for all the expences, or at least for a ticket).

I wonder, is it fair, that the girl has to travel to see the dude or it should not really be defined by the gender?

I know he got a serious job, that diminished his opportunity to travel, so he more likely sees me to travel to see him/..

But hes a Guy, so I think he shud be travellin to see me first? right?....

Answer 1

You're really considering going across an ocean to see a guy you've never met in person?

My cousin, as naive as she is, has fallen victim to not one but two internet scams that sound exactly like the situation you're in. Not saying this guy is a bad person but I would never try and date someone I find on the internet. Europe is a big place too, you know.

Answer 2

I would feel very uncomfortable accepting a gift of travel from a person I had never met in person. He could come to visit you; or you could pay your own way to visit him....but even if you paid you own way, I wouldn't travel alone.

If he is too busy to take time off from work to travel to visit you; then how much time would he have for you while you were visiting him? What would you do if things did not go well once you met?

Accepting this type of gift from anyone other than a close family member; or a spouse, a fiance', or partner of long-standing seems odd to me.

Answer 3

You've got it backwards.  Being a guest is a privilege.  Especially since your host is offering to pay your travel expenses, which hosts do not normally do.