Disciplinary meeting at school... help!?

Question

I am going to intervene and attend a disciplinary meeting for my niece at her school. She is in 9th grade, special ed. student, and has been acting out in class and in the hallway - swearing, yelling, arguing, etc. I'm not close enough to the situation to try to decipher the root of the issue, but I fear that my sister, who is borderline mentally retarded herself, is not going to be able to make this any kind of turning point and try to instill some positivity from this experience.

I do not have any children of my own, so I'm looking to see what I can expect or maybe some guidelines or advice for the meeting.

Thank you.

Answer 1

I'm not sure if by "disciplinary meeting" you mean a MDR, but it sounds as though decisions are going to be made.  Take the position that you must have a Functional Behavioral Assessment to determine what the true issues are and to consider appropriate solutions.  If you're not familiar, research FBAs a lot before the meeting.  I would not normally suggest it, but consider hiring an advocate for your niece/sister who can advocate for the rest of your niece's school career because it is only going to be more difficult and technical each year.

I suggest that you work on getting supports in the home through Social Services/Family Assistance Planning Team type agencies.

Answer 2

High school is such a tough time. It sounds to me like maybe your niece is having a hard time and it's only worse because of her disability. It sounds like she's acting out because she doesn't know how else to deal with her feelings and other students. I don't believe that she's a bad person or student. I think she needs more help and acceptance. I would focus on what the school wants. It sounds like your niece lacks a way to deal with the problems she faces. Maybe she needs a teacher or adult that she can go to that can help her. Maybe she needs to join an after school activity that she enjoys and does well at. That will give her an outlet for blowing off stress and help to increase her confidence. Does she have friends? If not, then why? What can be done to help her? What is the difficulty? I think with her, you and the teacher are going to have to dig deeper. She may not have the words to express her thoughts. She's only in 9th grade. It could be that she's having trouble adjusting to high school. I remember it being a tough time and it's more so if you are different. Special Ed students are made fun of and not respected by other students. You are somehow deficient. It doesn't make you less human. I wasn't in special ed (got out before 3rd grade) but I had friends in it. I know it was tough.

Answer 3

that is always hard.  your sister will probably feel like the teachers and principle are attacking her.  My best advice is to be a mediator, and remind everyone that they need to work as a team for the good of your neice, and that blame does not lie with one peson.  If your sister goes into the meeting with this in mind, chances are it will go a lot more smoothly.

Answer 4

I bet that is really hard on your family. And especially on you since you are the one that needs to take action. If you are a Christian, then i would pray for the girl. and her salvation. If you are not, then that best thing i can suggest is be patient. Help her out. You never  know, the root of the problem may be that she needs more love and attention. or just a listening ear. I will pray for her. And for you to understand what she needs and help her out.

God Bless

pinkii

Answer 5

It's tough making a suggestion without knowing the level of disability.  My son is MRDD (mentally retarded and developmentally delayed) and attends a regular high school but in EMR (educably mentally retarded) classes.

He had issues with his temper in middle school and we requested and got a BIP included in his IEP.  BIP stands for Behavior Intervention Plan and I hope she already has an Individual Education Plan in place.  The BIP will be drawn up by the appropriate people at the school and will be used to help bring her back under control.  It will outline what the teachers need to do to calm her down and will prevent her from being put in ISS or OSS (except for extreme behavior).  

Is someone picking on her?  That was the cause of my son's problems and once a buddy was assigned to him to help him move between classes the problem stopped.  Children are cruel and will torment the weaker in their group, unfortunately.