Divorce is close but I feel that it can be saved??

Question

We have been separated for a year, I am now living with her, but we have not talked about reconcilation, I am here because I want to be close to my boys because I had decided to move out of state. Now I have been here for about 2 weeks, and we have been getting along, at the same time I have been packing and I came across some letters I wrote to myself (to her) unsent. I realized today that I have been causing the same kind of problems repeatedly in our relationship, drinking to much, not being resposible, basically an ***. I realized this and I said to myself if I can stop drinking and become reliable it could work, so I was not thinking of going the route of ohh take me back I will change, I was considering still going away but really looking at myself and becoming the guy I want to be, and then take it from there. Any advice??

Answer 1

divorce is close but i feel that it can be saved?

            answer= god hates divorce,do your very best to save this marriage,it will be good for you ,for your wife and for your kids,

             if you have faith in god,pray for god's help.

                      all the best,take care ,and god bless.

                           divorce can be very ugly for the entire family,think about it.

Answer 2

sounds like you are on the right path.. keep with that.

and only time will tell.

Answer 3

Talk to her about how you feel and where you are coming from. If a marriage CAN be saved, it always worth the shot. Maybe she feels the same way. Maybe a part of her is begging for you to get down on your hands and knees and say its going to change just give me one more shot and suggest counseling, a couple retreat... With children in the picture, its more then worth another shot.  

Answer 4

I am personally acquainted with someone who married her first husband after she divorced her third. But maybe you should take this opportunity of peace between you two and tell her how you feel.  Maybe it is still a good idea to go away, I support that, but I would let her know that I am only going to make myself better and then I will be coming back.  Now, while you are gone, you have to get to work to make major changes in your life, getting help through counselling and all. And when it comes to the couselling, make sure she is invited to get involved.

Answer 5

A thought:  If you really love her, then that is about her and not about you.  But if you commit yourself to her BECAUSE you love her, then she will likely commit herself to you because she loves you, and her strength may be just the boost you need to get off the drink.  It is much more likely you will overcome the bottle if you are assisted and encouraged by the love of a good woman, versus your thinking you can go off by yourself and succeed on your own (be honest, you've told yourself that before and it didn't work).  Let her help you, and you two grow in your love as you struggle together.