i found out from a friend that my husband went behind my back and filed divorce papers yesterday. i guess im getting served them tomorrow. i want to know what my options are because i knew we had some communication issues, but aside from petty things (me not finishing a degree quickly enough for his taste and going at my own pace), there are no grounds for divorce. no infidelity, nothing. last we talked (we're both very busy w/ school and work), we were going to work on us, but he's made school SUCH a priority that it hasnt happened. in any case, i don't want the divorce, i want to get counseling first and try to work on us, THEN divorce is a very final last resort. i'd even try a separation if thats what he wants. im in the state of california, and he can afford a lawyer (not easily but he can) but i cant. what are my options as far as telling him this tomorrow and not signing the papers yet? i know i have 30 days in ca to respond by signing or fighting, but if i want to fight it and try to get a judge ruling that we try to work it out (wehavent tried at all, we've only ignored the giant elephant of non-communication in the room due to school and work and life in general) in counseling first, how can i do this w/ no money for a lawyer? is this even possible? does he have grounds for divorce w/out my consent? i may add more on this later because im quite emotional and confused right now, so im not sure if im making sense...any help, SERIOUS answers, will be appreciated.
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