Divorced women out there, answer this....?

Question

did you ever think that you'd end up divorced? Like before you got married and maybe the first like year or so of your marriage, did u ever think you'd get a divorce, and what made you finally decide you needed to get a divorce?

Answer 1

My 1st marriage was not supposed to end in disaster.  My husband changed and got badly into drugs and drinking.  They were more important so divorce was necessary. A gold digger would marry in anticipation of getting a partners money.  Some people marry to give citizenship in exchange for money.  I knew a g*y man in the military who married a woman so she can have medical benefits and he could have family benefits and base housing.  It kept him in the closet and the single mom and her child gave him a family image.  It is strange but true.

Answer 2

Well, my last husband bruised my ribs a week B4 wedding (I lied to everyone & said I slipped on the stairs), but went thru w/it, afraid that if I didn't there'd be worse coming. The whole relationhship was very volitile. I will say the physical abuse stopped after our child was born. After him refusing to work, lying, stealing my ccds for beer/cigs, pawning anything he could get his hands on that wasn't nailed down, and the last straw was driving drunk 2x's in 10 days with our then 3 yo child. We were divorced w/in 3 months, 3 LONG months. Unfortunately continuing drama....

Answer 3

I have been remarried for 15 years but I did not think that I would get a divorce. He cheated on me. We had only been married a few months and I was not going to live like that.  

Answer 4

Never in a million years!!  I married my first love and we had a big wedding, the whole enchilada.  I was 18 and he was 24.  When I turned 21 everything changed.  I changed.  My husband was a controlling and an emotional and mind game master which didn't come out until after we married.  He had his married life and his own life where he could go out and do whatever.  For 3 years I put up with it and waited in the window crying until 3 a.m. for him to come home on Friday or Saturday nights.  We had no phone so I couldn't even call him back then.  

When I turned 21 I got that "I'm an adult now" attitude and started challenging my husband.  He didn't like it and we fought and the mind games got worse.  It was like being a prisoner of war being with him.  He knew my weak points and he used them to his advantage.  I think towards the end he was actually enjoying messing with my head and my emotions.  I was miserable, and the worst part was he had convinced me that if I left him no man would want me because I had a child and was a single mom. (just one of his mind games)  

One day I went to visit my parents and my dad commented that I had become "a whipped puppy" in my marriage.  Imagining that reflection in my dad's eyes was the straw that broke the camel's back.  I went to the courthouse that same week and filed for divorce.  Took me years afterwards to deal with all the PTSD and transform the whipped puppy into the pit bull I am now!

Answer 5

When a woman comes to know her limitations. That's when you get divorced. You feel it in your gut, but deny it for longer than you should.

we usually walk into a marriage wearing rose colored glasses. Especially if we are young and naive Life and our experiences with others, including our family members, is really what determines what path we may go down. They say, that we marry our family members.

I married my father (1st marriage) and my despicable (child molester)eldest brother (2nd marriage). Until we work out our childhood issues and grow to honor ourselves first, we are destined to repeat the past. Good luck

Answer 6

I married for all the wrong reasons and knew within the first year that I was sunk with a loser. I was young and hard -headed and believed that I could "make it work".

I wasted eight years of my life.

There wasn't Yahoo answers back then. :)

Answer 7

I never thought I would end up divorced. I fully intended to be with him for the rest of my life. We were married for 5 1/2 years before I realized I needed to get out. He is an alcoholic and refused to get help. He would only do anything about his problems if it was court ordered and he would only do it until the court stopped breathing down his neck, then he would go back to the way he was before. I stuck with it because I believed in him and I believed he would eventually get his head out of his butt. Unfortunately, I was wrong.

The last straw came when he got staggering drunk on a couple of occasions the last summer we were married and rushed at me with his fist in the air and stopped right at my face. He didn't hit me, but he had never done that before. He had pushed me, he had called me names a few times, but he had never come that close to hitting me. After that, I got out. I've been divorced for 3 years now and I wouldn't change it.

Everybody's situation is different. You are more than welcome to contact me via IM if you would like.