Do I Owe Her. Should I not be?

Question

when I went to pick up my 3 yr old son from daycare the director told me that they older kids had a feild trip to chuck e cheese and since there was an extra space she took my son. At first i was like oh that was nice thanx. Then she was like so you owe me 10 dollars. I'm like watch you mean i owe you. I didn't ask you to take my son no where. She was talking about thats not fair. she said he wanted to go and he's a kid so i took him. First of all he is a 3 yr old who has a mother. She should have called me first before she took my child on a field trip that he wasn't supposed to go on in the first place. i never knew my child went anyhwere. i don't think i should habe to pay her for something she supposedly did out of kindness and she didn't get my permission to take him out. i'm a single mom what if his father or somebody was watching or stalking and God forbid he was kidnapped? i would be at work thinking my son is safe and sound! Am I over reacting or should i pay her?

Answer 1

$10??? tell her that was an awfull lot of trans fat filled c**p to be shovelling into a 3 year old... how can it cost $10 for a 3 year old? Don't they eat half a little burger, if that?

Answer 2

I agree that you should not have to pay her. I woudl be furious if someone just took my child somewhere, especially somewhere like Chuck E Cheese without asking my permission, and then to have the gall to ask you to pay for it? I would explain to her that if she would like to take your son somewhere she must call you in advance for permission and also to ask for any monies needed to attend. She decided to take him along to be nice then she needs to extend that niceness to the cost of taking him. Also I would let her know that if she ever again takes your child outside of the daycare facility without your knowledge and consent that you will be changing daycares and contacting your local child care licensing board. What if something had happened to you and a family member needed to go and get your son? They would not know where he was. That was very unprofessional and dangerous thing for her to do. You are in no way obligated to pay her for her "niceness" and lack of consideration.

Answer 3

I would probably go ahead and pay her the $10.  I would also make it clear to the director and the staff that your son is not to go on any field trips unless you are informed when and where.  I honestly have never heard of a daycare taking a child on a field trip without parental permission.  I think I might be tempted to look for a new daycare provider.

Answer 4

You don't owe her anything...if you DID pay her she would have kept the money...she isn't allowed to take any child anywhere without the permission of the parents especially at 3 years old!...you should take your child out of the school and if you were really upset with her you could sew (i hope i spelt that right!) the school/woman He'll be safe if you take him out of that class and talk it over with him so will understand when he gets older

Answer 5

Pay her and then let her know from now on if she's going to take your child anywhere she needs your permission first...

That is pretty crappy though, to ask a 3 yr old if they want to go to Chuckee cheese, I mean HELLO?! Like their going to say no. lol

Answer 6

First you need to decide if you still feel safe having your child there. Unless this is a close friend of yours and she knew you would be fine with her taking your child without permission this was completely unacceptable. Unless they have a paper on file stating that they can take him on any field trips that may come up it is not legal for her to do so. They must have permission. A lot of schools are now having you sign a permission slip that just states "any field trips" and I refuse to sign it. I want to give permission to specific ones so I fully know when and where and get a choice.

If this is the only problem you have had with the center and want to keep the child there I would say that you should pay the money and tell her that in the future you insist on being called beforehand so you can decided what your child does or does not do. If you want to keep your child there it is better to just pay the money than have to deal with bad feelings and gossip from now on.

If you have other concerns about this center and your child's safety you are well within your rights to pull him out of the school and find one that will not take your child places that have not been discussed and agreed upon.

Answer 7

Don't pay her one red cent!!!!  A 3 year old could get trampled at Chuck e Cheeese if you are not supervising them closely.  This woman actually took your child in a vehicle without your permission, God forbid if soemthing was to happen on the road or if they took public transportation, that's even worse.

I would tell her, to ask for that payment in writing, yes tell her to bill you.  That will be your proof that she took your child on a field trip without your permission.  Then turn her in to the authorities, I mean, don't the phones work at the daycare center?  They would have called you if your child was sick and running a fever, why couldn't she at least call you and ask for your permission and tell you about the fees?

Answer 8

Tell her that  being kind or not, you don't owe her because you never signed any permission slip for your child to leave the premises.She did violate the law, so either she stop asking for the money or you will turn her in to the authorities.

Answer 9

no dont pay her because she didnt ask and you didnt know so you dont owe her anything and if there is a law suit get  a good lawer and you will win

Answer 10

My concern wouldn't be so much over the $10 - but the fact that she put my child in a vehicle and took him without my permission - or knowledge. Legally, she cannot take your child anywhere without your consent.

Pay the money or don't - that's up to you - but I would find a different facility to keep my child. One that I knew where my child was and that he was safe.

Answer 11

I agree with you.  It was a field trip for the older kids.  You didn't sign anything.  What if something had happened.  She would have been held accountable.  I would take him to a new day care.  The more I think about it the madder I get.  How dare she!!  That is your son.  She def. should have called you.  In fact it's prob policy that she call you, and more so that you sign a permission slip.  I might pay her, but then I would def pull my child out.  I would also give her an earful.  How would she like it?  Is there anyone above her?  If so I would call them too.

Answer 12

No Your Not Over Reacting At All...

and no i don't think you should have to pay 10 dollars...

it was her idea..

and it was very rude for her not to tell you she was taking your son somewhere anything could of happend and you wouldn't of even been there thats's not right at all...

but no that's not rude at all...

if i was you i'd find  a differant babysitter...

Answer 13

??? She took your child on an outing without getting your permission first? What did she use for a carseat? Have you signed anything prior to this which allows her to transport your child for any reason?

This is whack. She should have called you on the phone before doing any of this. The 3 yr old shouldn't have even known about the trip until after it had been cleared by you.

This sounds very unprofessional...as for paying her---what kind of person is this???? is your child going to have issues if you don't pay?

I would be upset. I would also want to see the car seat and where it was strapped into her car...You are right to be upset.

Answer 14

Sound like you need to find another daycare. If someone took my kid ANYWHERE with out telling me and then tried to extort money from me. I would totally FLIP out.

I would tell her to shove her $10 and i would find another daycare IMMEDIATELY! I would also report her to the state for taking my son without my permission.

Answer 15

Well u said thanks so obviously you told her that you appreciated what she did. How will it look if at first you said "oh that was nice thanks." then "you had no right to take my son anywhere." Just pay her to avoid conflict. Thats the last thing you want. Just tell her when your giving her the money, "I would appreciate that you tell me next time you take my son out."

Answer 16

Be mature about this and pay her. Honestly, I don't think you owe her. But you let her know that it is ILLEGAL for her to take your son on a field trip without signing a form or your word of permission.

Answer 17

I dont think you should have to pay here because you are you never asked them if they could take your son and you shouldn't ower her any money. Just tell her that she asked him if he wanted to go, and that you are not going to pay her but she should still take the son to Chuckie Cheese.

Answer 18

No...."he who invites...pays!"...You don't owe her anything...But, everything else you said...Humm..You thought it was "nice"...until she tried to charge you...THEN you came up with the "what ifs"....as excuses "to not have to pay"...a little "self-serving", isn't it?. If taking your son without your permission really bothered you....you would have complained from the beginning....regardless of "the bill"...

Answer 19

No! Don't pay the woman. You were wronged. What she did was totally out of line - she has no right to take your 3 yr old anywhere without your permission! I would be furious if I were you.

Answer 20

First off, I'd freak that they took my kid somewhere without my permission.

Second, I'd say that without prior agreement, you don't owe her anything.  Tell her that as you did not give consent, you're not going to pay for this field trip, but you'll be happy to pay for any you consent to in the future.

I'd also be considering if I wanted to keep my kid there, if she can just whisk 'em off any time she feels like it!  But you know best if it's a good place, so trust your instincts.

Answer 21

She was totally out of line on that one.  If this is otherwise a great daycare, and they made one mistake, I would just give the woman 10 dollars to avoid conflict, but have a serious long talk with her.  Tell her he needs permission to leave ANYWHERE, and talk to her about any other concerns you might have.  I

Answer 22

Oh Wow -- Yeah I would be pretty hot if this happened to me & my little girl!! I would tell her not NO -- but H*ll No -- I am not paying her c**p!! For one she took your child somewhere without your consent -- like you said -- what if something would have happened to your little boy ((hurt or kidnapped)). I mean that is kind of shady that she would take your kid somewhere without asking you first -- THEN ask you to pay for it!! I would tell her that your first concern is his safety/wellbeing NOT the lousy 10 bucks ((I mean are they really going to miss 10 dollars!!)) Weird. I would def. consider another childcare for your little man -- Seems as though they are not very trustworthy. I mean it's worth the price increase or whatever the circumstances to switch him to a better facility -- I mean your baby is PRICELESS & you just don't want to take any chances. I know you mentioned you’re a single mother -- which I applaud you -- but if money would be an issue for switching him I know in our state ((Louisiana)) they offer childcare assistance to single mothers - so check with your state to see if they offer that to you. Good Luck ♥

Answer 23

This daycare sounds sketchy to me.  What she did is completely illegal.  First off, she not only needs your permission, but most likely your written permission.  Secondly, what kind of kid would you have if he didn't want to go to Chuck-E-Cheese?  Of course he wanted to go.  There isn't a kid who wouldn't.  Plus $10 is an awful lot for a 3 year old at Chuck-E-Cheese.  She took responsibility for the child by taking him w/out your permission, therefore she can take responsibility for paying his bill.  Tell her that if she wants to push the $10 issue that's fine, you'll be pressing charges for taking your child w/out permission.

Answer 24

i think you need to go back to daycare and learn how to spell and talk with correct speech

Answer 25

I think ten bucks is a little steep.  I mean there is not that much at chuckie cheeses a 3 year old can do!  

Also, she can't take your kid anywhere without consent.  Anywhere!  I think I would tell her that you did not agree to this field trip so you didn't agree to paying for it either.  She should have called first.  My next question would be how many kids went and how many adults?  Hove you been to chuckie cheeses?  OMG!  that place is a mad house!  I would question how well watched your child was there.  Yes they have the special stamps so someone else can't steal a kid, but that is so not the point.  You don't have to take a kid anywhere to do something bad.  I would think about a different sitter if it's possible.  Especially if you are worried about an ex taking your son.  I would be too worried!

Answer 26

well you dont really have to do ether say thanyou and maby give her a candle or a flower or a movie just a little thanx

just get her a gift

or take her to a nice dinner

Answer 27

My answer depends on whether you can find a new daycare you like.

If you can, then don't pay her and tell her "too bad, you assumed and took my child out of the daycare setting without my permission." Then see what happens.

If you can't find another daycare, pay her but STRESS to her that she is never to take your child out of daycare without your written permission again.

Answer 28

I don't think you should have to pay. She didn't ask you and whatnot. I would be worried if you did pay her that she would do something similar again just to get money out of you. She kinda sounds like a sneaky thief.

Answer 29

I don't think you're overreacting at all! In fact, she is breaking the law. You need to talk to a lawyer about this and see what actions you can take.

Answer 30

This person had no right to take your child anywhere without your expressed permission.  Hopefully you have a copy of the contract you signed with the facility in the beginning, bring this to her attention and refuse to pay her the $10.00.  You owe her nothing, SHE owes YOU an apology for breaching her own contract.