Do I Pay For Family and Friends Hotel Expenses For My Wedding,If I'm Paying for the entire wedding?

Question

Me and my lovely fiancee Jesseca L. plans on getting married next September. Her family has done so much for me already it wouldn't be right for them to pay for our wedding also. My dad is deceased and my mom and me don't get along so i'm paying for the entire wedding. I have no help with this so far. I'm paying for her dress, the location, the reception, the honeymoon cruise, and etc. such as caterers and planner. I was informed recently I might have to pay for there hotel expenses as well. I've already got a second job to help pay for this wedding. Is it okay to ask the guest from out of town to pay there own travel expenses if I give them a 9 month notice and explaining why they have to pay there own way due to my circumstances? Any answers and replies is a blessing. Thank-you

Sincerely,

Chris

Answer 1

You do not need to pay for there rooms.  Here what you can do call the local motels and see if you can get them a discount.  Then include this on a little note in the invites saying something like:

Hilton is offering rooms for $ per night please call for reservations and use this code for the discount.

Use the hotel that gives the best discount for the quality.  

Answer 2

may i just give you a little broader insight here?  it is a long established tradition that the parents of the bride pay for her wedding.  because women are in careers and on their own and marry later many women have taken it upon themselves to pay for their own weddings.  the groom traditionally never pays for the wedding.  

are you assuming they dont want to help pay for their own daughters wedding?  have you actually asked them?  and why isnt she paying for some of her own wedding?  why are you paying for everything?  

sounds like everyone has to travel to your wedding.  when people have to travel out of town for a wedding it is customary for the brides family to send everyone a list of hotels that they have blocked out rooms for under their name usually at a reduced, specially low price.  this info is sent out well in advance of the wedding and then people can make their own arrangements and pay for their own rooms.  

it is a lovely gesture to invite every single out of town guest to the rehearsal dinner, and pay for their dinners at the rehearsal dinner.  in some areas the rehearsal dinner is given by the parents of the groom, but not everywhere.  

you are proposing to send out a letter to people about coming to your wedding and then telling them you cant pay for their hotel rooms.  first of all, this letter should come from the bride and her family, NOT you, and secondly, again, are you assuming that the brides parents dont want to be involved with this?  that may not be too wise of you.  

and last, i hope you reconcile with your mother and that she is at your wedding and all of you are happy.  

Answer 3

you don't have to explain anything to out of town guests.  nor do you need to pay for their hotel rooms.  if they can't afford to come to the wedding, that's that.  are you going to have a taxi bring them to the airport and pay for their airfare too?  buy them a new outfit to wear and pay for a dogsitter?  you have to draw the line somewhere or you'll end up paying for other people's expenses.  you have your hands full with paying for the wedding, don't take on more debt than you can pay for.

Answer 4

No.  You don't.  You can try to put them up in with family or friends' homes, but to pay?  No.

Answer 5

The only people you have to pay for the hotel is for those actually in the wedding the rest have to pay their own way.

Answer 6

NO & whoever told you that is either misinformed or trying to get over on you

You can always suggest cheaper lodging in your area to out of town guests but it's not expected of you  

Answer 7

nope, not your responsability. It is yours to find a hotel and book a block of rooms for them to be set aside.  Then you send them this information (usually if you do this a hotel will give your guests a discounted rate because so many are being sold.  People don't expect you to pay.  If they can't afford it then they don't comel. it's jsut the way things go. now if, say your mom, wanted to come but couldn't afford it you may want to make an exception for someone THAT clsoe to you, but normal guests are on their won.

Answer 8

I don't believe it should be your responsibility to pay for their rooms.  I don't know who's telling you that but I would never expect anyone else to pay for mine.  Just send nearby hotel info to the out of town guests.  They can deal with it themselves.  You could, however, contact a decent local hotel and try to arrange a locked price for your guest, something like that.

Answer 9

No you don't have to but if you call the hotel and block rooms for your guest they get a discount.