Do I need to continue an adoption if fathers rights are terminated based on a pending adoption?

Question

My child who has not had contact with the biological father since 1 year of age is now 9 years old. I am now married and have hired an attorney to terminate the father's rights and proceed with a step-parent adoption. My attorney is a jerk and I have not heard from him. He literally yells at me if I call and showed up late to our hearing. Despite this, the biological father's rights have been terminated and I havn't recieved any paperwork that he has appealed, so I believe it to be final. I cannot afford to hire another attorney. The papers state that rights have been terminated and that the ex-parent has no right to information about adoption proceedings. The judge was aware of a pending adoption at the time of judgement and terminated rights based on abandonment. Since my attorney is worthless and I cannot afford to hire another, can I still change my child's name even though the final paperwork comments on a pending adoption? What may happen if we do not proceed with the adoption?

Answer 1

If you don't proceed with the adoption, you've just made your son into an orphan by getting his father's rights terminated. I assume that means his birth certificate got altered.

You may alter his name regardless of his parental status at any time. He might enjoy it if you preserve some forms of identification with his original name on it.

Answer 2

Without seeing exactly how they terminated his rights it is hard to say. Did they terminate his rights properly and legally? These issues have been getting up into various state's supreme courts due to a number of issues.

There is one problem. The termination due to abandonment is a grey area. In most states they can terminate due to abandonment but it is grey area under federal statutes. Especially with case law and rulings of the past 5 to 7 years. If not done right this can come back to haunt you.

Answer 3

If you are certain the termination of parental rights is final, then permission for adoption is only up to you. Changing your child's name does not constitute an adoption and you can do this without an adoption process. It has to be done through the court.

Answer 4

Terminating the biodad's rights does not make your child an orphan.  You are still the parent of your child, he/she just does not have a legal father at this point.  You are the sole guardian/custodian of your child.

The birth certificate is not changed by a TPR, it's changed by an adoption.  Your child's birth certificate is still intact as it was the day he/she was born.  The biodad's name will not be removed, it will be replaced if/when the stepparent adopts.

If you change your child's name instead of completing a stepparent adoption, your new husband does not gain any rights to your child.  Child just gets a new name.  If you were to pass away, your spouse would not automatically get custody of your child.

I would strongly recommend proceeding with the stepparent adoption when possible.  You don't have to do it right away, but it will create both legal and emotional permanence for your child to be adopted by their stepfather.  See if you can get some recommendations from the adoption community for a better attorney.  Many lawyers say that they can do an adoption, but it's worth a little more money to hire one with a reputation and experience.