Do all rape victims need counselling?

Question

I was raped at the beginning of this year. I have now come to the survivor stage and I feel happy again and I have found myself. My friends advised me to get counselling but I don't feel like I need it. I tried counselling by email and there just wasn't no point as I have got through this alone.

I feel like I am getting through this myself. I am a positive person and I'm doing well. I now have a new job and passed my 1st year of university. My life is great and the rape isn't stopping me enjoying life any more.

My friends admire me now for my strength and are proud of me but they do worry about me and I am like 'I'm fine, it's ok seriously' I just want to live and enjoy life. My rapist is a t**t to me and I won't let him take away my life and happiness

Answer 1

People's responses to dreadful crimes like rape are as individual as is each victim of crime.

Counselling would be made available to you free by any Rape Crisis Center, of which there are many, should you, now or ever, decide you need it.

You don't, and I congratulate you, and am glad that you have survived and are feeling comfortable, confident, positive and happy.

By all means, get on with your life. Live it full, and live it well.

For what it may be worth, you have my best wishes for your future, and admiration that you have overcome your experience so well.

Answer 2

Good for you! If you feel confident,happy and able to get on then you should do it your way and feel proud of yourself for doing it.

Good luck and best wishes x*x

Answer 3

You sound ok to me, I wouldn't waste the money on consoling if that's how you're really dealing with it.

Answer 4

You seem a remarkable woman, so for what it is worth from a total stranger, well done for meeting such trauma with obvious courage and resilience.  I have experienced something similar as a younger woman and felt that counselling was not needed.  I agree with your sentiments, really, if you don't feel 'broken' don't be tempted to 'fix it.'

The one thing you said is that your attacker is still pestering you, and that concerns me, so I do hope you are maximising your personal safety, and that his behaviour is not going to continue to impact on your life.

You must always do what feels best for you - so police, counselling, you have to way up the affects and impact of it all.  Do not feel obligated to do anything. I hope you keep well. Good luck.

Answer 5

I think you need to take the jerk to court because what's stopping him from doing this to another woman? But other than that... everyone deals with their pain differently. Not everybody needs special counseling. Good for you if you don't. But also, just recognize that there may be some underlying problems that haven't come to the surface yet. If that does happen (notice i said IF), hopefully you will seek out someone who can help you. Until then, God bless you and good luck.  

Answer 6

I'm happy for you and the positive attitude but you're not down many roads yet....initimacy/s*x again ?  Is the man caught and in prison?  If not, then what ?  I would recommend counseling.  Good luck and stay strong.

Answer 7

Talking to friends, family and even us yahoo lurkers is a form of counseling. Talk to someone if you want to, don't do it if you don't find it helpful. Just always be cautious, the mind can play tricks on you.

Answer 8

Some victims are more sensitive than others, and it depends on the situation and scenario I think. Counseling sure helps, that is what it's meant to do, so if you don't take it (or feel like you don't need it), it can be harder than if you do take the counseling. Now, I'd like to say that you are brave, although I have never known anyone getting raped, I know it is a very though situation, and I think that the aggressor is lacking soul in them to commit something like that. Take care of yourself.  

Answer 9

If you are truly doing fine and don't have any issues or problems that you have been unable to deal with, then no, you don't need counseling.  After I was raped 4 years ago I did have counseling for a few months but after that I felt I no longer needed it.  Other people, depending upon the circumstances of the rape and their own emotional make-up might need far more counseling than I did.

So, it is a matter of individual differences and differing circumstances in my opinion and therefore if you feel you don't need counseling because you are doing well, then great, you don't need it.

However, I have to disagree about not taking it to court.  You should never determine that there is a lack of evidence because you don't know what the police might turn up through their own investigation and while questioning the suspect.  In addition, I think we really have a responsibility to others that might come in contact with this individual to at least put society on notice that this guy was accused of rape in the past.  I think that if you are doing well that bringing the guy up on charges wouldn't prevent you from moving on.  But, that is something only you can determine.  Best of luck to you.

Answer 10

thats GREAT that you are ok and are getting on well in your life, especcially after everything that b*****d put you through.

but i think yoou should still take it to court as the next girl might not be as strong as you are. as well as that, why the h**l should that guy have got away with doing that to you? he WILL reoffend again, a******s like that always do so please tell the police about him before someone else gets hurt