Question:

Do i have issues with parenting?

by  |  earlier

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Okay so, my issue :

I'm recently married, with no children. Some time ago i offered to help a woman who was a single mother by babysitting for her as long as needed with as little as 5 euro a day (just a typical low price so she doesn't feel i'm doing it out of pitty)

She worked in a nightbar so she was constantly tired and i told her to leave the kid with me for 2 days so she can sleep properly and get some rest. I had my husband with me and we were taking care of the child as it was our own, but i noticed i didn't let him hold the child too much or let him play with her as much as anyone else would.

It seemed unnatural to me, and i couldn't help myself.

I grew up with only my mom, my dad died when i was little and i don't recall any memories of him. So i assumed cause i grew up seeing my mom doing everything, i had that mentality.

But what happens when i have a child of my own? Is there anyway i can check if i'm going to be this worrying ? or not wanting anyone else help me with the care of the child?

Is this a sign that i will be a hysterical mother? when i think about giving birth i have this images of me not letting the nurses take the baby when it's given to me after birth.

How can i tell if i'm going to be a good mother?

Many people tell me i act very loving and mothering and protectively to younger people i know ( i'm 26 and i know a 15 year old girl and a 16 year old boy who have troubles at home and they usually come to me for their school stuff or advices, and i don't let anyone talk dirty around them or rude and they like that around me the enviroment is more 'clean' to what they are used to)

But i assume it will be different when the child is my own.

Is anyone experiencing this?

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2 ANSWERS


  1. This is an issue that cognitive behavioural therapy could really help you with.  You just need to teach yourself to stop your negative thoughts.  I mean think about it, Not wanting your husband to spend time with your baby, do you really think that's an issue that you can't change, and you'd rather not have kids because of it?  It's just something you need to work on.


  2. Sorry to tell you this but it won't be different when you have your own child.  You'll be asking yourself all these questions and more no matter what sort of childhood you had.  The minute you stop asking and worrying is when you should really START to worry :))))

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