Do new babies usually take away a husbands attention twords his whife

Question

we had a baby 11 days ago together. I have also a 6 and 1/2 year old son who my husband considers his, but is not. Now we have a new born. I may be crazy but I see him giving all his time and energy to the new baby. I shouldnt be jelous! but is this normal??? he does not pay attention to me at all except to say I Love You. People at our Congregation are saying he looks unhappy with me, ???

Answer 1

After 11 days of baby-induced sleep deprivation, I am shocked that anyone appears happy in any way!

It is common that new fathers get jealous when their wives heap attention onto the new baby, so if your husband is doing a lot of taking care of the baby, it would stand to reason he has less time for you, and it would be natural for your to feel jealous.

Don't forget all your hormones are doing the crazy postpartum recovery dance.  It is natural for you to feel emotional.  Try this:  Tell your husband you need a little attention yourself.  He's probably so sleep deprived and overwhelmed that he didn't even notice he hasn't been loving on you!

Cut him...and you...some slack!

Answer 2

He's probably just excited to have a baby he can really call his own.  I would mention to him that you are feeling left out and that you need attention too.  After all you went through all of the pain and work bringing the baby into the world.  Don't be too hard on him but do bring it up.  By the way, people at your Congregation sound kind of rude saying something like that, unless they know you and your husband really well on a personal level I wouldn't take it to heart.  Just as you are emotional, I'm sure your husband is too.  

Answer 3

Its a new baby, it needs all the attention it can get, plus there hasnt been a new baby for 6.5 years so this is pretty much all new again, give him time, its only been 11 days. If he is still doing it in 2 or 3 weeks then take him aside and talk to him! Right now all the attention is on the new little bundle of joy, be happy that he cares enough to help with the baby, some husbands get you pregnant and expect you to do everything to!

Answer 4

dont let other people ruin your relationship if you have concerns ask him. and as for being jealous you should be happy many dads just say they dont have time to spend with their new baby. my husband does hat at times he will get home from work and just say hi and give me a kiss and take our baby girl and play with her. personally i love seeing him so happy with her..

Answer 5

Yes they do and any normal woman would be happy that the new father would put the time and energy toward it that he has. Tell the people at your congregation to stay the heck out of it. Do they live with him or do you? If he is any kind of father at all then you are now second on his list of priorities after the baby. The first year was the toughest for me and my wife but we knew our son had to come FIRST. He is almost 2 now and we wouldn't want it any other way. We don't get as much time as we would like to do things together as we did in the past but every time we look at our son its worth it.  

Answer 6

It's possible you're not thinking clearly.  Hormones are going crazy now and you're probably really tired from lack of sleep.  Keep that in mind when trying to figure this out.

Believe me, it's better that he's paying extra attention to the baby then not any attention at all.  Most husbands are not really "into" babies until they're a little older.  So it seems we mothers have to do most of the work.  Take advantage of him and let him take care of the baby some so you can relax or hang out with your 6 1/2 year old (remember he has to do some adjusting, too).

Answer 7

Its the idea of having a new baby around I bet!! He's so excited he's not giving you as much attention. My husband didn't do this so I'm not sure this is normal or not. BUT why would people at your congregation comment like that? That is rude I think! Give it some time. He'll come back around. Try to give more attention to him and see what happens. Hope this helps!