Do other people think this also?

Question

When ever I hear a women say she didn't breastfeed, and it's for a stupid reason I get mad at them and feel like the are a bad parent. Does anyone else feel this way?

Answer 1

you are rude! a lot a women have different issues with breastfeeding! i could only do it for the first 3 months. then i had to travel a lot to help my father out with running his business for awhile. we all do our best as a mother and your not a BETTER mother

Answer 2

I was not comfortable with breastfeeding...So by your standards Im a bad parent? Well thank you for judging me without knowing me! And FYI my daughter has hit all of her milestones early, and has never once been sick.  I must be doing something right since shes 8 months old.

*Unlike you I dont judge others on how they raise their children.  As long as they are fed, and have a house then who cares if someone breatfeeds, formula feeds, cosleeps, uses the CIO method or whatever else.*

Answer 3

are you serious? Really,are you?

Dont worry about what other people are doing just concentrate on your good self.

Answer 4

No because I understand that not all woman can breastfeed and some shouldn't do it.  I am the only one in my large family to even try to breastfeed and I just respect other people right to choose if they want to or not and don't question it.  Really for you I would say what do you consider just a stupid reason?  

Answer 5

well , to tell you the truth i am tired of all u self-righteous ppl who bf putting down ppl that don't...as for their reason for not bf that is NONE, and i repeat NONE of your business, perhaps it is for a medical reason that they don't think is ANY of your business...i am a RN so i know that bf is best, but i am so sick of ppl on here jumping on their high horse...so i have some questions for you and 'your kind'...do YOU feel selfish when you get that shiny car you wanted, or the new shoes you could have lived without, or that pack of cigarettes, the meal at the restaurant, get your hair or nails done, go to a tanning bed, buy yourself soda or chips or pretzels at the supermarket, etc...bc you KNOW, you could have used ALL that money for a college fund, or some other thing for your child....or saved it in case your child became ill and needed expensive treatment...does the shoe fit?

EDIT: easy there?LOL you were a little kid that had a kid,yet seem 2 think u simply breastfeeding makes YOU mother of the year?

PLEASE; and if you are super mom, you should have been able to bf properly and not have cracked, bleeding, nipples with parts of them being sucked off....

Answer 6

no but I do think they cheated their child of the best possible start in life

breastfeeding has antibodies formula does not

breastfeeding has proteins that formula can only mimic or try to

breastfeeding has enzymes that aid digestion formula does not; that is why at first many formula fed babies get constipated or upset stomach

that being said, formula is not bad or unhealthy, its just not as good as breast milk. and if you can give your child the best, and not second best, then why not?

mortgage: I've never heard of some1 being allergic to their mother's breastmilk. I didnt know that was even possible?

and to the person saying it's "gross" "not natural" how? It's the most natural thing in the world.

Answer 7

People have to do what  is best for them.  It won't impact your child, and quite possibly could be for reasons too personal to mention to you.

You feeling so upset is far more concerning to me.

Answer 8

I have 3 kids and didnt breastfeed any of them. everyone has their reasons and you are no one to judge if their reason is stupid. i didnt breastfeed because i wasnt comfortable doing it. it didnt seem natural to me. although i know its suppose to be natural. it just grossed me out.

Answer 9

I dont feel they are necessarly a "bad parent", but I hear some stupid reasons, and just kinda think to myself that they didnt really try hard enough, or just make excuses. it is a lot easier to bottle feed. and bottle fed kids are a lot more independant from what I have seen.

I personally didnt really have any problems breastfeeding, except that i breastfed my son for 2 years and it was extremely hard to wean him when i wanted to when he was 1. and now i feel like i have breast fed enough for a life time and dont really want to do it again. but i mean, i will probably end up doing it again with the next one, since BREAST IS BEST and ALOT CHEAPER!

Answer 10

Who decides what's a stupid reason? Does breastfeeding automatically make you a good parent?

It can be really difficult for some women to breastfeed for so many reasons. Is it any of your business why a woman chooses not to breastfeed?

Of course women should be encouraged and supported to breastfeed. Naturally breastmilk is the ideal food for a baby, but ultimately it's not going to hurt the baby to be formula fed.

There is so much more to good parenting than what you fed your baby for the first year or so of it's life. Just look after your babies as best you can and support the women in your life to do the same.  

Answer 11

The main point is it is a personal decision: if they didn't want to, then good, if they did, then it is also good.

The best thing about not breastfeeding today is the technology and advances made in the milk produced.  It has muscle building qualities and more of what the babies need.  

Answer 12

Even though it is the healthiest way to start, it is not for everyone. As much as you get mad at parents like us who don't breastfeed, I got mad at all the judgments that were passed on to me with both my kids. It's not for you to judge other people's decisions. I wasn't breastfed and I turned out just fine. Both my kids are very healthy - and smart. When it comes down to it - it's a personal decision. Just like circumcision, and piercing a baby's ears are also. It's fine if you don't agree, but judging them is ugly. I'm sure you may do things as a parent that others would not agree with and they think you are a bad parent. None of us are perfect.

Answer 13

There's never a stupid reason for or for not breastfeeding.  What is stupid to you may make sense to me.  I don't judge women for not breastfeeding.  My oldest would not latch on, my youngest fed for 45 min at a time.

My g/f son was allergic to her breast milk.  Is she a bad parent?

Answer 14

Get over yourself.  I breastfed my son and am currently breastfeeding my daughter, but I would never presume to judge another person's parenting ability based on the decision to breastfeed.  Does the person love their child?  Do they make sure they have nourishment and clothing and attention?  

I hate the insecurity that breeds moms that have to play the competition of "my child is better than your child" and "I'm a better mom because..."  Parenting is hard, as moms we should support one another.  My best friend and I have drastically different parenting styles (I'm a scheduler and really strict on diet and bedtimes, she's more laissez faire) but both our children are healthy, happy, and loved.

Answer 15

No! I am a total advocate for breastfeeding! But I do not think someone is a bad parent for not doing it. Some of the reasons might be selfish on why they choose not to breastfeed, but Breastfeeding a baby when you hate doing it or it is so stressful to you is not beneficial to the mom or the baby.

Answer 16

I feel that it is a personal choice. I tried to breastfeed with my daughter (now 6 months old) and neither of us were tolerating it.

Breastfeeding can be a bonding time with the baby, but so can bottlefeeding. How can a "natural" thing like breastfeeding be a wonderful thing when the mom is uncomfortable and dreads the feeding (like I was starting to do)? Doing what is best for the baby also includes doing what is best for mom.

No child has suffered from not breastfeeding and if the mom is uncomfortable with it, baby will sense it and be uncomfortable too.

You are a trooper to keep up with the breastfeeding, but what is best for you and your baby does not always go for someone else.

Word of advice, try not to judge other parenting styles. As long as they are not hurting the baby (ex: shaking baby, etc), let them decide what is best for their baby. Every baby is different and so is every parent.

Answer 17

nope.  everyone has to do what is right for them, their child and their situation.  

breastfeeding is not easy, ESPECIALLY AT FIRST.  some women feel it is a hopeless cause.  "why should i even try?  i have to go back to work and do not have a job that allows time for pumping" or "there is no sanitary place for pumping once i return to work."  

even in the hospital, the nurses were practically hooking my up to a formula supplimentor because they thought i was starving my child and he would end up jaundiced because of it...  this is what they actually told me! (um, milk hadn't come in yet, shouldn't medical personnel know this, shouldn't people working in the maternity ward know not to freak out a new mom fresh out of the operating room with no sleep or food for 30 hours  with a screaming baby coming in for feedings every hour...)  and this was in a pro breastfeeding hospital with a lactation consultant.

our laws (at least here in the US) are not very breastfeeding friendly.  there have "initiatives" & "goals" to have every child breastfed for the first six months but no laws to protect the right TO breastfeed in the workplace.  i wouldn't eat in the rest rooms at work (i don't even want to pee in them!), why would i feed my kid food from there?  according to all the books and literature you need at least 6-8 weeks to get a good supply going and get the hang of breastfeeding but by them you are already back to work.   sure i could stay home for the whooping 12 weeks leave but since it's unpaid, who actually can afford three months without pay?  

our culture is not very breastfeeding friendly, despite all the pro-nursing groups and goverment programs and lactation consultants.  I'm breastfeeding now, you would think my being the one with the very private part of my anatomy exposed would be the most uncomfortable.  noper, how uncomfortable my breastfeeding makes other people is what makes me REALLY uncomfortable.  and it does make me feel isolated at times when I am out and about and the baby is fussy and people are whispering (not effectively -obviously since i can HEAR them) "is she breastfeeding?"

b*****s are so sexualized it is no wonder more women don't want to breastfeed.  or it freaks them out. or it freaks out the people at the supermarket.  or their friends, family, husbands.  as a culture we have forgotten that b*****s were MADE for this.

so, no i don't begrudge anyone their decision, until our culture and laws are more supportive to women, it's no wonder they come up with "stupid" excuses not to even give it a try.  they aren't imagining it, the cards are stacked against them.

Answer 18

For a truly stupid reason yes, but more often then not there is more behind that reason that we know.  I was not making enough and starting pumping, my little man decided he liked the bottle better.  I pumped and pumped away and now at 6 months stopped due to a ever slowing breast milk day by day.  But with a lot of woman, they are simply not comfortable with a a baby sucking on their boob 24-7.  I was devastated when I took my son in to measure how much he was getting when I fed him.  The second I he ate his first bottle he smiled for the first time, and did not cry.  He was hungry for the first two weeks of his life.  Again when mothers need to work, and can not pump it is better to have the formula then the baby go hungry.  Also with smokers, and drinkers, formula all the way.  There are warrants to not breastfeed, even though I believe in it 100%.

Answer 19

No, I don't feel that way because I don't plan to breast feed. I have gotten many snyde comments from women basically saying I am a horrible person because I don't want to feed my baby the same way as they want to..I hope you don't say rude things to women who bottle feed. It's really inapropriate and the way a mother feeds her baby-whether it be through a rubber nipple or her own nipples does not determine the mother's capability to care for her child.

Answer 20

no, its their decision because its their body. My mom did not breast feed me because she didnt feel like it (not the way she puts it but what it comes down to lol) and i would be PISSED at anyone giving MY MOM a hard time about it. I love my mom, i get pissed at anyone insulting or offending her in any way so in case you are trying to do the baby a favor, im sure he/she would appreciate it more if you would leave his/her mommy alone.

Answer 21

Not at all.. That's their choice just as well as it's yours.. Why would that make them a bad parent? I didn't breastfeed either of my children and they are very smart and healthy!! I know plenty of people that do not breastfeed and plenty that do breastfeed... I don't think one parent is better than the other just because of the choice they made. And I know that I am NOT a bad parent because my children took a bottle!!  It's just your opinion. But to feel like they are bad parents??? No, I've never thought this.