Do some men actually like bigger women?

Question

I'm 19 years old and I've been made fun of (mostly by men) my entire life. Why do men do this to women? I can't even make myself talk to men anymore without thinking, "Does he think I'm a cow?" and I don't even try to date anymore because all I ever think is that a man would never want a fat *** like me.

What can I do to make myself seem more date-able and please don't be rude and say lose weight. I've had enough negativity in my last four years at high school, and how can I get my confidence back up?

Thanks.

(rude comments will be reported) :]

Answer 1

ya know, when I'm feeling down about myself, I like to watch girl power shows or movies like s*x and the City or Bridget Jone's Diary.  They help me remember that I'm s**y no matter what anyone may think.  Inner beauty and confidence exude sexiness which is what attracts people.  It's true that many guys don't like fat chicks, but many guys do or don't care.  And the guys who do and don't care are the good guys.  Good luck, I'm sure you will find a good person to share your time with soon.

Answer 2

There are SOME guys that find larger women attractive (but trust me its not a lot). You have to put yourself out there in arenas like online dating places to better look for them.

I have a female friend who's overweight and posed this question to me at lunch one day and i immediately got nervous and my heart started racing. I hate the idea of hurting someones feelings and i guess she could see it in my eyes and dropped that path of conversation.

The truth of it is that guys are NOTORIOUSLY visually stimulated and  "larger" women don't stimulate most men and that's not going to change.

I don't know if there's anyway to not let that bother you. I'm a little wary of the "real women have curves" sentiment that is being pushed so hard because its only going to lead to more frustration when you're single and looking.

Guys that made fun of you are immature plain and simple. There are men who will want you, like anybody else you're going to have to look and once you find him you may find your concerns alleviated.  

Answer 3

Yes, they do. Those that aren't shallow anyways. I am no skinny minnie and I have been married 13 years. My cousin is over 300 pounds and her husband is skinny, and they have 3 gorgeous kids. They have been married for 15 years, and still going strong. Some men don't care how big you are. Do not do anything to seem more "Date-Able" just be yourself. That is enough for any man who is not shallow.

Answer 4

I've always (not exclusively, but often) dated bigger women. It's not the size that attracts me, but the personality. So it happens...

BTW, if you live in a Northern area, there is NOTHING better than hunkering down between the sheets with a big soft woman, on a cold winter night. My definition of Heaven...

Answer 5

I feel the same way too!! I think men are evil!!! Evil I tell you.

There are men who likes big woman. Not all men are the same. Just go to a bar or some meeting place and be yourself. Don't be affraid of what others are saying. I believe that there are someone out there for everyone. When you feel a strong feeling inside like you need to go out somewhere, just go!! Maby you'll meet that special someone. Me, hasn't meet one yet. But you gotta go out. How else are you going to meet someone.

Answer 6

yes, i do...larger women are a sort-of-status symbol. think of it like this, both of my wives are rather chunky, so what does that say about me as a provider?!  as far as food shelter, clothing. hint, hint, hint!

anyway miss...don't change a thing, if the man is worth your time & your heart, he'll accept you as you are!

Answer 7

Im a good-looking young girl who always had so many guys , however , i dated a FAT guy  ! i mean FAT with huge belly n u know what ? I loved it !!! i thought that he was so special , my cousin is like that , he dies for his girl's big *** ! so there are guys out there who'd LOVE you for you ! and enjoy looking at every bit of your body without comparing you with Rihanna, basically if a person is going to love you he will love n date you and enjoy talking to you , just get confidence and believe that you are WANTED :X good luck  

Answer 8

men can be mean! there are plenty of men that like bigger women. maybe you could go with a different style... your outfit can make you look totally different. play around with different colors and cuts until you find one that flatters you most. if youre not happy with yourself, do something about it. walk or go to a gym. who cares what they say just love yourself. weight isnt everything its how you present yourself. be confident and smile. thats a very attractive feature!  

Answer 9

I do not find overweight women attractive ( especially at 19 which should be the peak of physical perfection) , nor do any of my friends of aquaintances.

There are some guys refered to as "chubby chasers" who claim to find overweight girls attractive.

You can take your chances and hope that a chubby chaser will be your MR Right or you can develop a healthy diet and exercise routine ,improving your health and appearance and a wonderful by product will be significantly brodening your dating possibilities.

Which seems the wiser choice to you ?

Answer 10

If you believe  yourself only to be a "fat cow" or "fat a**"  that is all anyone will ever see because how you see yourself can be clear as day to others and they will play on your insecurities.  And yes we live in a vary vain world where some men will prefer the perfect 10 over someone who isn't but remember that you bring more to a friendship and a relationship than a "fat ***" you bring you to the table, and I am sure that there is something at least one thing that is beautiful about you.  Find that one thing and play it up, be confident, in who you are and how beautiful you truly are.    It is never easy to rebuild the confidence back up, but you can  surround yourself with positive people, and remember that high school, it is just so high school, people are constantly putting others down to make themselves feel better and cover up their own insecurities.  

Find the beauty within first and then you will be able to find your own personal beauty outside.

Good Luck!!

Answer 11

well, it is all a matter of personnel preference.

Be active, take up a hobby or join a club. Just be out and about. Can't meet anyone if you wall yourself in.

But if you are unhealthy it is not a joking matter you should see a doctor. As it increases your chances for heart disease,diabetes and other harmful illness's.

Comments that violate yahoo ToS should be reported but truths you don't like is cherry picking advice.

   P.S don't put ultimatum's into your question makes it seem hostile.

    

Answer 12

Yes, they do, but in your age group this may not be the case just yet.  What's important to them is not the woman, but looking good in front of their friends.  It takes maturity to fall in love with someone who isn't primarily eye candy, but it happens all the time.  (I was 18 when I realized I preferred men who could keep me warm in winter and provide shade in summer.  I never liked skinny guys.)  

Please, just be your beautiful self and a nice person whom others want to be with.  You're in a tough time now; it will pass.  Develop a thick skin towards the judgmental fools, and for heaven's sake stop looking.  Things happen in their own time and your time may be a little ways in the future.  You will find a wonderful guy who appreciates you for yourself and accepts your size as one more wonderful thing about you.  Good luck.

ETA:  Please - stay away from the so-called chubby chasers who get off watching women eat.  I know one woman who ate her way up to over 500 lbs to please her man.  She wound up in a (very large) wheelchair.  Stick with someone who likes you for yourself.  And stay active, involved and positive.

Answer 13

Depends.

If your just a trifle overweight, that doesn't matter, in fact, that usually means bigger b***s, which is a ++++

Now if your like 5'11 and 550 pounds thats a bit of a different story.

Answer 14

Mhmm, many men like bigger women.

But you really do have to stop thinking of yourself as a "cow". It may be a phase (if your still in high school), but guys only dont like larger women who dont like themselves (however cliched that may sound), because it is easy to tell. I cant tell you how to increase your confidence, but try working with your friends on it.

Answer 15

One thing that I would say is that people make fun and put down other people because of their own feelings of inadequacy.   Men and woman alike often have a need to feel superior to someone else in order to feel good about themselves.  They exprese their values by what they are able to ridicule.  

I can tell you with certainty that their are men out there who are highly attraceted to a buxom woman and repulsed by a skinny minnie.  Teenagers are more prone to pick dates as arm candy and to be influences by mob mentality.  There may have been boys who have passed into your life in the past who were attracted to you but were reluctanct to show it for fear of being ridiculed themselves.  This type of behavior tends to go away with more mature individuals as they grow older.  

As you interact with people, try not to anticipate how they are going to react to your physical appearence.  The important thing is to be be compfortable in your own skin, and to project an air of confidence.  There are lots of men out there who are more attracted to a winning peronality than to a model-like body.   Don't fall into the trap of sending out signals that you think you are undesirable and unworthy of someone's love.  The more confidence that you project, the more likely someone is going to be attracted to you.  

From a health stand point, set aside an hour a day for some meaningful exercise.  I always recommend some vigorous walking and some exercise that increases muscle mass which will increase your metabolism.   Check out some of Joyce Vedral books and videos.  Look past the snake oil stuff her presentation and get into some the dumbell exercies that are part of her program.  I can promise you that if you can get on a regular exercies regimine of lifting and walking you can make some very dramatic improvements in a relativey short time.  When I was diagnosed with diabetes 10 years ago, I got Joyce's book for me and between the weight lifting and walking I lost 70 pounds in three mounths.  I did this while consumeing over 2,000 calories per day.  

Answer 16

I suppose......... Relatively, high school is a closed environment ; the real world offers much more..

Answer 17

Perhaps you should try going for huskier men.  Men with more meat around the waist.  I know obesity is a constant struggle for some people, an addiction that people must fight at every moment in their lives and should not be made fun of.  Don't give up the fight though to lose fat.  Find the motivation somewhere!

Answer 18

Oh yes -personally I do ,and if they are wearing clothing that is a bit on the tight side ,I don't know ,it really gets my motor going ! I'm not kidding,there's more but for now this should do..don't worry there's even a web site devoted to guys who dig watching women gorge on cake and ice cream! And every one of the ladies are "plus-sized",and are making bank by just chowing down! See how ridiculas it is to think of others who are thin as being "attractive" ? In reality it's a mind game in the long run,so don't be down or sell your self short,just maybe develope some sort of "hook" that will set it off just enough to start getting what you're looking for!

Answer 19

Stacey, yes there are good men out there who can see past the superficial things like weight.  Dress to accentuate your best features and downplay your size so that you feel better and more confident about yourself.  Don't base how you feel about yourself on what others say, know you are a good person and deserve to have a good relationship.  

Answer 20

Some might, I don't.

Answer 21

Certainly.  

Just like there are some women who adore chronically unemployed men.

Answer 22

Despite what you might hear, men actually have a wide range of preferences with respect to women's appearances.  Men are actually non-monolithic and have a rather well-developed neocortex (obviously not nearly as well-develped as a modern-Feminist).  But nonetheless, men do have rather good development of the neocortex.

Men's preferences vary tremendously in the way women look and the type of sexual partners they find most attractive.  I happen to be a man (a defective member of H. sapiens per feminist Dogma) but I like Raspberry Diet Snapple.  My friend is also a man and he prefers Dr. Pepper.  I think I'm right, but my friend thinks he's right.  But to generalize about an entire gender of a species based on my preference in non-alcoholic beverage would as rational as generalizing based upon the sort of features I may or may not find appealing in women.

Of course, take this with a grain of salt, as I'm a man, and inherently defective, uneducated and suffer from some ambiguous Oedipal complex, have sexual preference uncertainty and ambiguous genitalia (per modern Feminist dogma).

So consider the source when making your decision.  Certainly no man can possibly be as rational as a modern-Feminist because modern-Feminists are the best and most constructive members of society..

Answer 23

I'm sorry there are people out there that make fun of you. Some people can be crass, immature, and cruel. Most likely because they are insecure about certain aspects of their life. You just have to ignore their ignorance and let them become inconsequential to you. They are small-minded people not worth your worry.

There are guys out there that will date bigger women. Just keep looking.

I don't know much about you; I don't know how "big" you are, or why you are overweight. But I do think diet and exercise will do you good. That's not "negativity"; it's positive advice. Perhaps go to your local gym, and talk to one of the trainers about what steps you can take to lose weight. He/she should give you advice. A regular workout regimen combined with a sensible diet will make you look and feel better. :)

Answer 24

i say s***w what other people think, high school can be a horrible place . if your comftrable with your body then thats good enough let others think what they want

Answer 25

only men who are pigs do this and as for HS well they're just immature. i used to get picked on in school as well. i've always been a thick madame and guess what most men might not admit it but some do like a woman w/ a little meat on their bones, especially in the winter. anyway it's not a/b them it's a/b you and like some one suggested,i say get into therapy b/c it's what helped me w/ my low self esteem,which i think you suffer from when using the terms to describe yourself tells me. hold your head high and command and demand respect my fellow thick sister. i never thought i would get married and found me a man who loved a thick woman. i'm healthy so it's not a big deal but i'm glad i DON'T have to worry a/b dieting. trust they're out there. also a movie that helped me appreciate all of my curves a/ called,PHAT GIRLS, starring mo'nique and it was funny but also showed that we pretty hot and tempting women need and want love too.

Answer 26

You are asking a question, ruling out the appropriate answers before starting, and begging someone to tell you what you ask not to hear.

Eat less!  This will ensure weight loss and self-esteem will grow with how you feel you should look, not with accepting how you are.

To make yourself more "date-able" you can make yourself more available.  You might have your sights set too high; lower them and see who comes running(no pun intended).  

Answer 27

Do some women actually like bigger men?