Do they hear the kids?

Question

I'm not a parent, so it's just a curiosity question. Many times I see parents with kids who are screaming or running wild, and they seem not to notice. Do they learn how to tune them out? I see other parents that control the kids better, and wonder why some don't? Do the parents of the wild ones realize that other people are there, in a public place? I love kids, but I like reasonable noise levels too. I think it has to do with the way they raise them, but again, I'm not an expert. Do they think that talking to the kids or disciplining them will do no good? Perhaps it would just make others feel better if they try.

Answer 1

You had the answer when you said it may have something to do with the way they were raised. Some children are raised in "quiet" houses while others are raised in loud ones. Some children need to be loud to get the attention they need. Then again, some kids have loud parents, while others have quiet ones. This could play in it too. You know how some people are just loud people.  

Answer 2

In most cases yes it's the parents fault that their children are raudy and misbehave. If the children have respect for the parents then this problem will cease. But most children like to test their boundary's. A parent must be firm on their rules and decisions. If the child is throwing a tantrum, it's best to ignore their behavior due to the fact that it will encourage the child to believe that by throwing a tantrum they can get what they want.

[sorry if my spelling is off, that was never my best area]

Answer 3

Some kids are just wild and "spirited" and no matter what a parent says or does they can just get worse.  Some parents are lucky and born with children that have great personalities that are more "disciplined" from the start but beware those quiet kids are usually secretly the worst (trust me on that, I went to school with some).  I think I would rather know my kid was doing bad things so I could help correct it than to have them act all polite and everything and be shocked with they do something horrible.  Really though yes we learn to tune some things out because sometimes we have to pick our battles and if a child is looking for attention they will act out to get attention because even negative attention (yelling, spanking....) is attention to them.  

Answer 4

I hate if when children act like that and the parents just ignore them. Like that is what we all want to listen to while we are eating or shopping.I take pride in the fact that my daughter is well behaved. Granted she is only 10 months old but when we go out she knows not to scream and throw a fit. I see these other children that act terribly and my husband and I always say our child will never act like that.  

Answer 5

Of course talking to them and disciplining them will do good.  That's why some parents have better control of their children and some parents seem to have NO control over their children.  It all boils down to discipline (assuming the child in question has no developmental issues, of course).

When parents are too wimpy and weak to enforce good behavior, when they allow the child to be in charge and do what he/she wants, the result is what you describe....wild, running around kids who other adults are looking at and thinking, "it's too bad for those kids that their parents don't teach them better".

Most of those parents are purposefully "ignoring" the bad behavior because that's what they have read is the right thing to do...WRONG.  Ignoring bad behavior only condones it and allows it.  Teach children NOT to do the bad behavior...don't just ignore it. You don't teach by omission!! You teach by correcting and leading them to the right way.  Ignoring it does not teach the right way.

Other parents don't even notice because their kids act like that all the time.  They are so used to hearing all the running around, screaming and yelling, they don't even notice...it's just background noise to them.  That's a shame.

Answer 6

You are correct. I have kids, but when I go out without them, I too notice different behaviors in children. When the kids are in control and the parents aren't and vice versa. And it does have to do with how they are brought up. I can go anywhere with my children and they have never had a tantrum in a public place or demanded one thing or another. Oh, they try.  A new toy or some candy at the checkout stand. If I say no, they accept that answer and we go on. They also know that I am there for them at any time. I listen and love them, teach them.  I just answered a question about spanking vs time out. A child knows if the parent is listening, there for them or if they are just present with their minds elsewhere. It will get their attention somehow even if it is negative. Anything to have mom and dad notice them. Kids are smart. They don't often hear what we say, but they watch every move we make and create their opinion of us based on that.

Answer 7

I agree. I hate standing in line at the grocery store with a little boy/girl behind me yelling and screaming their lungs out. Why? For a simple piece of candy their parents denied them. The parents just stand there looking around while their kids scream, cry, throw themselves on the ground, jump up and down and some even curse! Bad parenting, simple as that.

Answer 8

The kids may have ADHD and the parents are tired of the looks from the people around them when they try and discipline their children.  Yes they can take it to a private place in the store but people are so sensitive on what is right and wrong to do to discipline a child.

I take mine to the bathroom and make sure that they know there will be a punishment at home if they continue their behavior.

Answer 9

Well...  this is a tricky thing..  You look at those wild kids and to you, you think they look normal.. but guess what?  They may be ADHD.. or have a mental disorder.. a learning disability.. developmental issues..  You just dont know.  As humans, we tend to judge people but let me tell you, this will come back to haunt you later.  See, my sister has a severely hyper ADHD son.. she corrects and corrects and corrects this little boy but nothing works.  He has tried numerous medicines as well.. but nothing works...  So people like you judging these wild kids that cant help themselves is like you judging a child with the flu for puking on the floor.. its just something that cant be helped at times.

Now personally.. I try my best to discipline my kids... However, with the laws the way they are, I cant just spank my kid out in public.. then I have the courts trying to take my child away.. so what do I do?  what can I do?  Some people believe if you ignore the negative behavior, then the child will stop.  Many kids want attention and try to get it any way they can, even if its negative.

Another explanation... Being a SAHM can be really hard at times.. sometimes, you're at your wits end.. You need to get out of the house but you've got the kids.. so you take them with you..  They are loud and abnoxious, but guess what? You don't care.. You;re tired of disciplining them.. so you ignore it.. you tune them out.. and try to enjoy your time out...

There are many reasons why people parent differently.. but we as a society, need to learn not to judge.

Answer 10

The parents with the kids that are well behaved, were once the parents of the kids having the tantrums. The kids have just learned that the tantrums aren't getting them anything, so they have stopped.  The parents not doing anything with the tantrum throwing kids are in the middle of teaching their children that lesson.