Do u leave you child/children with your boyfriend?

Question

if you and your child's father are not together anymore would you leave your child with your boyfriend who u have known for about five months when u go to work or party. i ask this because there is a growing practice (not sure if it is in my counrty alone) of women leaving their children especially girls with their current lovers/bf (not the child's father) and the child usually ends up abused/beaten/dead. in the past week alone two children have been killed (3yr old girl and 9mth old boy) and one they rescued (3yrs) with broken bones and burn marks over his body. in some instances the mother knew the child was bein abused the question is how could u let someone abuse your child. its very disturbing for me that single mothers are allowing men near their children without knowing them fully well first.

Answer 1

I'm married, same father for all my kids, but---hypothetically---NO WAY... I've seen too many news stories of boyfriends being charged with the murder of their girlfriends' baby/child... And, really, even if I knew him for a long time, if they're not his kids, then they're MY sole responsibility, if their bio father is not in the picture.

Answer 2

First off, my children would not be anywhere near a boyfriend of mine unless it was along term commitment.  Second there wouldn't be a long term commitment if i had even an inkling of bad feelings about him.

So many people don't follow their instincts these days, and really when are our instincts off?  Mine are usually never off.

Answer 3

Ok, you're a victim of the way news gets related.  The child does not "usually" end up abused, beaten, or dead when a woman leaves her child with her boyfriend.  Usually the boyfriend is a normal person and not a psychopath, plays with the kid, puts the kid to bed, and it doesn't make the news.  One or two or ten incidents in a month out of the thousands of times every day some divorced or otherwise single mom leaves her child in the care of a boyfriend whom she trusts doesn't make it something that "usually" happens.  

Presumably, if you love someone, it doesn't occur to you that they're going to abuse the child.  Abuse can be perpetrated by moms, dads, grandparents, nannies, day care providers, or babysitters, by people you've known your whole life or people you met yesterday.

Now if the mom knows the child is being abused and didn't leave that's hard to fathom.  But sometimes women in situations like that are fearful that if they try to leave the abuse will actually get worse (and sometimes they're right).

Answer 4

do you trust him with your life? DO you know that he will do whatever he can to save your child should something happen?

do you have any red flags about him? if you cant trust him then no if you dont think he will put his all into saving you kids then no and if you think he could possibly do something to your children then no. you have to be completely comfortable with him. How does he act around your kids when you are there?  Does he angry real quick, you gotta ask your self all these questions. and you have to feel completely comfortable with him in every way. good luck!

Answer 5

I dont know how people do that. My cousin does that to her children like it isnt a big deal she knew a guy 4 days then moved in with him. I dont care if my baby has a father in there lives or not but if i have been dating a guy only for a short while no way would he even meet my children. Kids bond real easily and you come in with a bf every few months thats really going to confuse them not to mention if they really bond with that person and that person is gone from them whats that ganna do to them. Unless i know for a fact this is going somewhere in a real deep commitment then and only then would i ever let him meet my children.

Answer 6

One if you cant trust him around your girls, then dont be with him. YOu need trust. My boyfriend watch my daughter and my sons, because it was all about trust and nothing has ever happen. And he loves my kids and has been with me for  years, and we married. Its all about trust.