Do we control what or who we like/love?

Question

For example..I was going to a posh dinner party thing, and there was gonna be rich wine and caviare, and i dont like neither. I wanted to fit in at the party, so I wanted to like this wine and caviar, so why didnt i? Its what I wanted.. also.. I used to like this guy, and then I stopped liking him, and found out he likes me.. now I dont like him like that, but hes great, and I wanna like him like that.. so why cant i? We dont have control do we?

Answer 1

We do not have control over who or what we like only how we behave ourselves,  you could like someone but choose to ignore the feelings and vice versa.

Answer 2

Ultimately, yes. But since so much of our indulgences is influenced by various sources (friends, the media, etc) it's sort of helpless.

Answer 3

Could you have not pretended to be... vegan ... and have nothing to do with it all?

Answer 4

We are under many influences which guide our likes and dislikes, many of which are beyond our consciousness.  There is also a factor of "the hunt."  Many of us enjoy aspiring towards something only until we achieve it, and then we are on to the next thing.  In my experience, men and women really cannot be "just friends."  There is always some kind of hanky-panky going on.

Answer 5

Decode this lyrics "Self control"

Look in the real world.

Physically?

No

Don't think so.

What we do or say.

Is spiritually control.

The DOS - Disk operating system.

With the spirit of God.

With Code of Honour of the Ten commandments.

As the Son of God.

With "In God we trust"

In doing the work of God.

For the good of mankind.

In making this world a better place to live in time.

In the creation of peace on earth goodwill to men in time.

Or with the spirit of the Dead Mummy  of failures and horrors of the past from the graveyards of different ghostly ancestor's culture and custom without being aware of it being expose in time.

With code of honour "Over my dead body"

In doing things at own whims as fancy.

With cheap-skate ghostly stories on tribe with non-existence rights of original descendant.

As Son of a dirty old man from someone else graveyards.

As Tribe of a Rudeness Tribes in kicking the butts of God in not worshiping God without being aware of it being expose in time.

With the creation of loss of peace on earth goodwill to men in time.

In kicking the butts of own little ones, own children, own generation ,own tribe, own community and children of all tribes of different community with self lack of knowledge.

Without being aware of the mess created in own backyards

In getting them all in climbing up the coconut trees and still look green with lost sense of direction of life.

Living in misery with total loss of IQ being "Reincarnated" as cave-men from the twilight zone without being aware of it

In self destructing human lives of own children with self lack of knowledge in own backyards.

Luke 8.5-8,10-17

What do you think?

Answer 6

I don't think we do. I have known boys who I always thought I hated and slowly as I got to know them, I found that I was attracted to them and I could not help but think of them, even if I didn't want to.

Answer 7

For me it has changed over time - that which I didn't love I now love - Some things I worked hard at - Like I wanted to love olives because all my friends did - so I always tried one and then one day my taste buds got it.

I now love some names I remember hating as a child because they were old fashioned or because I was too close to people who had them - Now names like Amy - Minnie -Louisa represent something else.

When i first saw  my partner i didn't like him on sight but when we started relating we started to love each other.  

I seems like a myriad of variables are working on our conscious s and subconscious to make like or dislike and sometimes the veil is lifted on t he disgust and it turns to like .

Yes I guess we cannnot change our first impressions but we can stick in here a bit longer to see if they change.

Answer 8

Yes you do have self-control, it's in you..something is causing you to not like him now for some reason or another..u didn't like it because you were tryin to be something that you know you wasn't probably..just a thought...Peace

Answer 9

you are following what u r naturally drawn to or not drawn to. so yeah, i don't think we have control over that. i can force myself to like something, but it just can't be the same thing as compared to how i'll be when i truly like or love something or someone.

but on an opposite note, if u truly desire to change .. for eg. a habit, u can...... if u r persistent and patient. for eg. one can become more peaceful if they are always in fight-mode......but, one has to truly want to change and be ready that it won't be easy and won't come overnight...but over a period of time with daily effort n intention.

so i guess some things can be controlled...maybe others, not.

Answer 10

That happened to me.

I liked this guy a whole lot, and never had the nerve to ask him if he liked me because he was my best friend at the time. well come to find out now, he likes me, and my feelings went away for him a while ago, i just cant find myself to like him like that again.

I don't belive you control who you like. I do however believe that you can lie to your self, i mean what you tell yourself over and over again is what your going to believe. But a situation like this, you have to look deep down inside and really ask yourself if you have feelings for him or not, and perhaps if you just cant find them, you can guys can be friends.

Answer 11

its not a part of controlling i believe.

its just your emotions givning way on something and not liking it anymore or being sure from the start that something is not nice or good enough for you.

Answer 12

why do you want an apple and not a pear? who knows but the point is you want it.We desire usually what we think we deserve

sometimes more than we probably deserve and many many people desire what they cannot have.

When you won the prize [the guy] you no longer wanted him.