Do you agree you cannot be friends with someone not your equal?

Question

like im starting to think Nietzsche was right in saying that you cannot really claim that you are real friends with someone you think is less superior than you, i used to think this friend of mine was my equal that is why i hang out with her, turns out she loves dating jerks, love men who cheat on her and totally hates the idea of dieting and believes that the great way to entertain the self is to go drink in clubs and waste her time in their almost every week, while i would like to have a business of my own, would prefer reading books and learning more and would have the self dignity not to accept a man who has cheated on me already

Answer 1

I think that you can be friends with anyone you want.  

Sure, some friendships take a little more 'work', but I believe that it is almost always worth the extra work.  

Nietzsche may be just taking that to an extreme position (he would now, wouldn't he?) but I can't agree that inequlities are an insurmountable barrier to friendship.  I like a lot of what Nietzsche says but I can't agree here.

Answer 2

well, one of my friends likes diets and i hate them. i just say like your body the way it is. anyway we are best friends even though she loves shopping and i love riding quads. we are different and its okay. We do things she likes and we do things i like. she is just confused about her life right now try to help her drink less and find a real guy.

Answer 3

I don't agree either. Comparing two people is like comparing apples to oranges; everyone has different qualities and preferences.

My husband has a college buddy who is your stereotypical frat boy from a well-off family. My husband on the other hand is a former factory maintenance mechanic who worked his way through college and married the summer of his junior year. The only thing they really had in common was the fact that they both majored in computer science. My husband graduated magna cumlaude with his bachelor's degree in 4 years; his friend is on the 5 year plan for the same degree. My husband and I just moved to Alabama so he could take a job with a small software engineering firm; his friend is moving to New Jersey to work for a much larger company. They were friends because they simply got along well together.

Answer 4

i do not agree

Answer 5

to be friends with someone doesn't mean that you have to like/accept all of their doings.

We can be friends with many, many people and no matter what our differences are we still learn from them.

Unless of course you just totally don't like the person - he/she doesn't have to be in your life at all.  

Answer 6

Because she doesn't read books and want to run her own business makes her inferior to you??

Forget the question, no offense, I disagree with your thinking that some people are more superior than others based on things they like to do, who they date and what they want to do with their future.

Everyone's different--"People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they're beneath you"

Answer 7

good philosophical question poor 'explanatory' bitching afterward.

my answer : are you stark raving mad to suggest that based on this line of reasoning? if you fit things into boxes this convinenient to prove philopshical maxims you are going to have undoctrinate yourself a lot from your present patterns of understanding at some point.

other than that i praise your goals, wish you well sucess in your future business and hope you are enjoying your book!

TE.  

Answer 8

Just because your different doesn't mean you are not equals.

Answer 9

Tough question.

But I'll try to answer as best as I can. You can be friends with almost anyone and they may or may not be your equal. But those that match your skills, your wants your dreams, are those carefully selected people that you are tight with. They fall under a different  category and are not subject to those of your occasional friend.

Answer 10

You have essentially answered your own question, in the questions itself.  

By indicating she is "not your equal" you have already reduced her status which you once held higher, presumably.  I think the case here is that you may have grown in some ways while she has not.  Couple that with the discovery of some of her faults and you have led yourself into contemplating whether or not to be friends anymore.

Although, I can agree that some people are more intelligent, more social, more - a lot of things - than other people, I have a hard time saying "Better" (Better is subjective.  I am a young, educated, world-traveled professional but to think I'm better than someone less educated, less cultured etc... is dangerous.  It's all a matter of opinion.)

Friends grow apart, plain and simple, an it seems that this may have happened in your case.  Maybe your relationship would be better served in going back to what made you good friends to begin with and see if that is still comfortable with both of you.  Most importantly though, I would talk to her before you discard her, there may be a reason for this presumably out of character conduct.  Clear the air and voice your opinion, it never hurts to say what's been weighing heavily upon you.  Who knows, you may even become better friends once you figure out each others perspective.  

Good luck : )

Answer 11

If a friendship lasts long enough, there will be times when your friend is superior, and inferior to you at times in their life. True friendship is always being there to give a hand up, or them give you a hand up. Only being friends with someone on the same level as you, isn't friendship at all really.

Answer 12

Equal or not, it is a matter of if you can have respect for an individual. If you have no respect for them (as you seem to have lost for your former friend), then you cannot maintain a friendship.