Do you brag about your children in front of them?

Question

I certainly realize that parents are very proud of their children and their child's accomplishments.......I am one of those parents. However, my daughter does not like it at all when I spread my feathers, even if it is to a family member.....it embarrasses her terribly. I never see it as bragging but rather as being a very proud parent. She sees it differently so I do my best not to (although it is hard).

My idea of bragging......We also get this Christmas card from a family member each year that goes something like this....."Sally just graduated from Harvard with a perfect 4.0. She has a new boyfriend, also a Harvard grad with a perfect 4.0, and he is the most handsome man in the world.............." Blah, blah, blah.......it is really of no interest to me to know about her boyfriend.

My question.........Do you do brag in front of your child or are you just a very proud parent?

Another question.....Do you think that bragging in front of your child will create a child with little humility?

Answer 1

i would not because i dont want my kids being suck up  

Answer 2

From a 15-year old child's point of view, my parents brag about me a bunch with family, friends, and people I don't even know. I asked my parents about this, and they said that they bragged simply because they were proud of my accomplishments. Although, I really don't believe that as it always comes across to me that my parents are just being ostentatious in a sense. I think bragging in front of me makes me feel better about myself and my accomplishments, but it does embarass me a little when I think that others may find me as a very showy, braggy person. Ultimately, it is embarrassing for me because I keep thinking about what others may think about my parents or myself.

By the way, that was a very nice question; it invokes a lot of thought.  

Answer 3

I think that you should always your child personally know that you are proud of them but not always about specific things only. If you think your child makes good decisions overly and will make human errors that they learn from(because you have been such a terrific parent) then usually it will speak for itself. If someone ask about your child by all means let them know how your child is doing as a whole. I do not know if putting out a general newsletter is such a good idea. Good grades are great but does a 4.0 mean a person will be successful in every aspect of life. I think most of us want our children to just be good people. I think most of us think our children are pretty great.

Answer 4

My daughter is only 4, but I brag about her in front of her! I think she likes it. When she gets older, Im sure I will leave a few things out, or talk when she is not around. I remember my mom bragging about me, and it drove me nuts! I think it all depends on the kid.  

Answer 5

Everything in moderation.  

It's totally understandable & quite commendable that you know your child's personality well enough to know that she does not feel comfortable being praised like that.  That's great.  

I try not to go overboard, too.  And, of course, try to keep the praise honest & real.  But, I am proud of them & it's good for a person to know that the good & amazing things that they are doing are noticed and appreciated.  So, yes, I will let my kids know that I am proud of them, when I am.  That good feeling that my kids get when they do something good or well is a natural teaching tool, a natural motivator to continue to make choices that make me proud, which makes them realize that they should be proud, too.  

As for the bragging holiday newsletters...  I don't do them myself, but I don't mind getting them.  You might not care about the boyfriend or the 4.0 GPA, and you don't have to, but their aunt or godparent might be happy for them & be glad to hear the news.  And, the child will, again, see this & know that mom/dad is proud of the choices they are making.  

Parents need to teach their children how to feel proud of themselves, when it's deserved -and- how to be humble.  It's not an either/or proposition.  It is possible that too much bragging will create a monster, but only if the parents forget to teach their child to see the other side of the coin, too.  

Answer 6

i do brag about my son a lot - and in front of him.  I think secretly your children love it - it could be worse - you could be putting your children down - a lot of parents do that too.

You be a proud parent - its better than the alternative

Answer 7

im not a mom but my parents tell people tha im good at softball sometimes.. its not really bragging. but i guess..