Do you enjoy/ understand this poem?

Question

The doors are closed

This train is locked

You must depart

At the sixth stop

Close your eyes

And free your head

This window sill

Is your new bed

Watch the colors

Pass on by

Your reflection

Will stay a while

The conductor yells

“This ride is mine”

Don’t get off yet

Its still not your time

We’re coming to

The stop of sanity

Let us fly by

It’s useless anyway

There goes your mind

Your conscience too

You’re getting older

Its three stops too soon

Your skin is graying

Your eyes are dull

There’s life in you yet

Just pursue

“Did you have a good life”

The conductor sneers

Your birth, your death

It now reappears

This ride we’re on

It’s yours so hold it

Treasure it, love it

And always mould it.

This delicacy of life

Is a portrait of fears

Freedom’s in your hands

Let if flow, hold It dear

This train will stop

And you will depart

The last sign you see

is one of heart.

Ratings please :)

Answer 1

Ahh, life's journey compared to a train ride. That is very unique. i don't think it is bad and I would rate it a 7 or 8. the beginning is a little awkward, but the rest is fine.

Answer 2

I love it. So original.

Please comment on my new poems!

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Answer 3

very nice! i love poetry and i compose poems myself too!

if we stumble at the drop of a hat

i will stop and tell you what?

get on my car and we'll go for a ride

let's find a place where we can hide

exchange some points of view about life

ponder and chew on some odes of the path..

continue making poetry! goodluck!

Answer 4

interesting...

Answer 5

I love it....I believe it is about life.

Life is like a train we just ride along enjoying the ride.

Sometimes its smooth and sometimes its bumpy.

And when your train comes to a stop and its time to get off then its just your time. some get off sooner and some get to ride a lot longer that's just the way life is.

Answer 6

its not bad but i got lost and back on track too many times if that makes sense. i actually felt something reading it even though it made not much scencs too me. id give it a 6. a good metaphor for a poem about life but i got lost too many times. idk. everyone else under stood it. mabey i as just reading it too hard

Answer 7

It was beautiful, I understood it completely, but id substitute out the line "And always mould it" and would substitute in the line "And never forget it" I realize that it gets rid of the rhyme bedween hold it and mould it, but it sounds better and flows with the rest of the poem much better, Keep it up, and if you want to Write more poems, don't give it up, Just remember dear, not everyone has a kind ear, so give me a call, And thats not all, you don't have to force it to rhyme, just take your time...

      -Drop me a line at [e-mail]...

Answer 8

da** 10/10 good poem yes i understand it is life and the last stop is when you die and you get older and older the train is the ride of life

Answer 9

emoish depressing and kind of tragic, like a love story,

kind of mysterious, i like it. :)

good job kid.

Answer 10

i liked it and understood it

Answer 11

yes and yes

Answer 12

I like your idea, but the rhyming flow gets a Little tedious.

Answer 13

It's random, therefore has no specific message.

Answer 14

No I don't understand it at all

Answer 15

I like that poem, good job man. It uses a lot of metaphors. 8/10

but good job

could you answer my question?

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Answer 16

I really like and I did understand it.

Answer 17

I think that the poem has to do with how short life is, and that death has to do with destiny. When you live a good life you can sit back, reflect on it, and enjoy the ride. Hopefully, you make it to heaven like the person described in the poem seemed to do. The conductor in the poem is most likely God (in a symbolic form).

Answer 18

i give it 14 stars loved it!

Answer 19

YOU ARE THE CODUCTOR OF YOUR LIFE,YOUR FREEDOM DEPENDS UPON THE CHOICES YOU MAKE. ONE WRONG STEP MAY COST YOU YOUR  SANITY.EVERYONES TIME WILL COME TO AN END lOVE IS THE HEART BEAT THAT WILL NEVER END

Answer 20

Nice you did a great job..

Answer 21

8/10

Answer 22

it's good but revise is little bit more

Answer 23

its good but sound a little emo just a little

Answer 24

Yes, I like it. Yes, I understand it.

Answer 25

I think it was great! I rate it 8 out of 10.

Answer 26

its kinda.............. um..... bad...okay...truth be told...i didnt even read it.

answer mine please:

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Answer 27

That was OUTSTANDING and easy to understand. It had allot of meaning and you brought it out beautifully. I think this is one of the few I've read that I dare say should without a doubt be published.....Good Luck with all your work. Palin

Answer 28

I really like it. It makes me think of life passing by and how short it is. I want to read it over and over. 5/5.