Do you ever find punishing your children makes the situation worse???

Question

Whenever i get punished it makes me more rebellious and stuff.... I actually think if your children have a good conscious just give them the silent treatment, whenever my grandma (legal guardian) gives me the silent treatment it seems way more affective then the taking away privileges because it makes me realize how much i disappointed her.. Does this make sense?? Please tell me your feelings about this

Answer 1

i think it depends on the kid. if its a rebellious teenager you are dealing with then good luck giving them the silent treatment or taking their electronics(iPod, cell,gaming system...you get the point) it better to tell them theat if they think their are so smart then they can cook, clean, and well basically everything you do for them by them selves and tell them to call you Mrs.(Whatever you last name is) if they want some thing. that works for any age. it certainly worked on me!!!

Answer 2

I think it makes the situation worse.

Answer 3

Well, different punishments work for different people.  Some are more hard headed, some only need "the look".  The thing is...you HAVE to accept it...you have no choice.  Until you are 17 you belong to your parents.  And if taking privileges away from from you makes you want to be more defiant...you need to work on your attitude.  Just being honest.  

Answer 4

Punishment is to teach you that there are consequences for your actions. If you get something taken away, hopefully you will see that as a consequence and change that behavior.

I think it's great you don't want to disappoint your grandmother, but it's more important for you to understand that good behavior will make your life so much easier in the long run. Just take your punishment with respect and learn from your mistakes.

Answer 5

No.  If I ran into a situation where punishment caused further misbehavior, I would escalate the punishment until it had the desired effect.  On the other hand, I've never had that problem.  First, we're pretty consistant with the punishments we hand out.  Second, we always explain why we are punishing.  Third, my kids have pretty well figured out that if they are doing something they know is wrong, they will get punished for it, and the punishment will fit the crime, so to speak.  Every once in a while, my eldest kids will decide to do something they know will get them in trouble.  They have considered the angles, and have decided that the price is worth the reward, and in that case, I don't get mad or increase the punishment, and I respect their decision to pay the price.  

In your case, apparently, you can get away with being more and more opbnoxious until your parents or whomever give in.  That bird won't fly in my house.  Imagine spending all summer inside with no tv, no phone and no internet.  And additional chores, and confinement to your room....The list goes on, and sooner or later, you might decide it was time to shape up so that you'd have a chance to go to senior prom.  The one time I've had it out with my daughter (she was 14 or 15 then, I think), I told her that she was setting herself up to take a fall, because her being grounded and in a pissy mood for the next six months wouldn't bother me as much as not talking to her friends and not getting allowance or being able to go online would bother her.  She saw the wisdom of that argument.