Do you ever wonder if your children thru IA adoption will move back to their native countries?

Question

How does that make you feel?

Are you nervous and scared for them to move back to a war torn or poverty stricken country?

Or do you believe the kids will just stay in the country you raised them in?

I know you can't predict the future so its kind of a silly question. I guess i anticipate DD going back to Africa. I would keep my views to myself, but in her shoes i would want to go. What do you think?

Answer 1

When my daughter is an adult I will support her in what ever she wants to do.  If she ever chooses to move back to India I could never be in a position to criticize her since I lived in that country for three years at the time my wife and I adopted her.  If it was good enough for her to be born in and good enough for us to live in then it will be good enough for her to live in once she's old enough to make that choice.

Answer 2

I've thought about that happening, and Taiwan would be a lovely place to live.  I might join her if it happens!  I don't fear the idea, and I don't expect to control where my adult child lives.  I guess I don't expect it, simply because most international adoptees don't go to live in their native country, at least for a long period of time, but I'm not opposed to it at all.

Answer 3

I've wondered.

It would be hard missing him, but I would fine with him moving... I'd be very proud if he actually took his education back for a good purpose. My 2 bio kids have both said they want to spend a few years living in East Africa (as do I, I absolutely love it around the Rift Valley). So I wouldn't be surprised if I end up visiting one of my kids out there someday. I wouldn't so much worry about the instability in Ethiopia because he'd still have his US citizenship and could come home if things ever got dicey. I would however be up at night thinking of him driving on those dangerous roads (if he lived in a place with roads, rather than in his families village).

Another thing I wonder about is if he will try and move any of his 4 Ethiopian siblings here. That is something that is maybe not very common about international adoptees but is extremely common among first-gen Ethiopian immigrants. Since we are maintaining contact with his family, and building some strong ties to the local Ethiopian community (most of them newly immigrated), I wonder if thats something he will pursue. I would absolutely support it if he did.

Answer 4

I've wondered about that.  

I hope and pray that by the time my children are adults, Liberia won't be a war-torn, poverty stricken country any more.  

I would be fine,  if they chose to take their education from the US and return to Liberia as doctors, teachers, contractors, etc.  

If they choose to stay here, I would be fine with that as well.  

I didn't live through what they did, so I feel I'm in no position to tell them that they should return, as adults.  Because of that, I also can't say what I would do, in their shoes.  

I will support my children, either way.

Answer 5

The thing is, most of those kids are Americanized, so don't really fit in those countries any longer any way.  Even the Vietnamese kids who were born here and are with their parents don't connect with Vietnam in the same way someone who grew up there would.

All 3 of the internationally adopted kids I know have made a trip to their original homeland, just to see where they came from. No different from me wanting to go to Finland to see where my grandparents came from.

Answer 6

If my children, decided to live in Korea once they were adults I would definetly support them. i think it's difficult for any parent to have their child move to another country, and be so far away, however I think it would be a great experience for them to get live in their native country, at least for a while.

In our case however, our children's native country is not a dangerous or difficult place to live, so I don't think I would have as many concerns as some other adoptive parents might have.