Do you feel guilty about breastfeeding second baby but not the first?

Question

with my first i allowed my husband to talk me out of breastfeeding(and nobody i know has breastfed). i regretted not breastfeeding after learning more about it. we are now trying for a second baby and i want to breastfeed. i am worried about feeling guilty for doing things differently with the new baby. anybody have a similar situation?

Answer 1

i also didn't breastfeed my first, but want to breastfeed my second.  and i definitely know that 'guilty' feeling you are talking a bout!! my first was a natural born latcher, i just wasn't ready... everything was soo new... just taking care of a baby was new.. and my husband was GREAt.  so helpful.  the breastfeeding thing added to the stress, and hindered my ability to care for my son.. so i decided not to worry about it, bottle feed him, and with the second, being a lot more comfortable with what i was doing, i'd breastfeed if the time was right :)  

don't worry about it.  you love both of your babies.  they were fed, that's all THEY care about!!!  just snuggle them both love them both and laugh with them both.. don't worry about the decisions you made.  you did them all for a reason, and you are doing the best job that you can for both you and your family.  keep your head up!! give yourself a break.. life is too short to stress :)  

Answer 2

don't worry.  everyone messes up their first kid.  the really cruel thing would be to continue to make the same mistakes just for the sake of staying consistent.  

Answer 3

Sam makes an excellent point.

You do what you can...before you didn't have support, or know any better, well you do now...the kids won't care, don't worry about it.  Just do what you think is right and dont' let anyone pressure you one way or the other.

Answer 4

When did you find out you were formula fed or breast fed? Did you care at the time and do you care now? I know it's harsh but your children will not know until you tell them and they probably won't think twice about it.

Answer 5

you shouldnt feel guilty at all for it first time mothers arent really sure on how to do things but as they learn and experience they know more and its alot easier with the second third fourth and so on so dont feel guilty just enjoy being a mommy again...

Answer 6

u shouldn't feel guilty cuz its not like the 1st baby is gonna be mentally challenged because u didn't breastfeed him/her

Answer 7

I do feel some guilt but I can't go back in time and educate myself and start over.  If I could, I would.  But, I'm not going to deprive my youngest only b/c I know more now than I did 3 years ago.  

That's just how I try to look at it.  : )

Answer 8

Why did you listen to  him ? so he can suckle off of you instead ?

yes you will feel guilty that you listened to him ( you do now dont you )

go ahead and breast feed all your children - that is why you have them!!

He will have to go play with himself while you nurse your baby

Never ever let someone else decide what to do with your body !!

Answer 9

I breastfed my 1st baBY for 6 weeks but then I stopped because I wanted to try all the free formula I had gotten. After a lot of research I had decided to only breastfeed my 2nd baby. My two kids are only 11 months apart in age. I didn't feel guilty because My first born is extremely healthy and well loved. Turns out that my 2nd born wouldn't latch, I had to have a c-section and that hindered my efforts even more as I couldn't sit up for a few days. I pumped my milk for 6 weeks. So they both got breast milk for 6 weeks. Don't feel guilty. You're doing what you feel is best at the time for you and your kids. But if I had another baby, I would try to breastfeed only because I was never really sucessful at it and would like to be. My b*****s are really large and I know ppl. say that the size does not matter, but my sister and I both have large b*****s and neither of us produced very much milk. Other women I know who have smaller b*****s produce a lot of milk. I think maybe the fat tissue blocks off the milk ducts in large b*****s.