Do you feel like you have to be your husband's identical twin?

Question

as far as interests go? it seems like i entertain all my husband's interests, i do whatever he likes to do but everything i like is stupid. it's like he is the "king" of everything that is good and wonderful and all his interests are better than mine. not once has he ever said he was interested in the same thing as i am. we don't like the same movies, but i watch his. we don't like the same music, but i tolerate his. we don't like the same style of clothing, but i don't talk about his like it's bad. we don't like the same anything...but i still go along with what he likes and don't complain while we are doing stuff, whatever it may be. i don't know how to enjoy my life and have seperate interests without him being judgemental of me. for instance, he would go to a football game, while i would enjoy going to the science museum. really, i feel like the only thing that we have in common is our children! what can i do? i have tried to talk to him about it, but he won't stop watching ESPN or playing PS3 long enough to listen!

Answer 1

no my husband is his own person and i am my own person

Answer 2

I'm sorry for what your going through, my problem is that I have to be his baby sitter. He acts like a child. I don't think he knows we have trash cans, he literally throws garbage on the floors and carpets, and expects me to clean it up. It's disgusting. His favorite thing in the whole world is drinking budweiser beer and leaving cans and bottles all over the house. Then he puts on his music gets drunk and sings at the top of his lungs all night long with the windows open disturbing not only me but all of our neighbors. We are separating over this SH@* My best advice to you is to start doing things on your own with friends. Let him do the things he likes to and let him know that from now on you will be pursuing your own interests.      

Answer 3

live and enjoy your life, he'll catch up.  

Answer 4

Forget talking to him.  s***w him.  Time for you to stop the act and go do things that you like.  You do not need him to have a life so go do what you want. If you keep pertending how will he know you don't like it?  He really sounds like he does not care so go do what you want on your own or get a girlfriend do to them with you if you must have someone along all the time.  So he does not like your stupid stuff, tell him his stuff is just as stupid to you so you both can agree and not have to say it again.  Sounds like you need a new husband but if you want to keep this one you need a new attitude.  IF you stop being his shadow maybe he could see you.

Answer 5

Granted my problem isn't as severe as your's but I solved that problem by doing my own thing. I have friends who like the same movies I do so I go to the movies with them. We have two tvs so I don't have to watch his cop shows. I like scifi so I joined a local Yahoo group and get together with them a couple of times a year just to talk geek.

But my husband and I don't do everything separate, we do things together too. It's a matter of balance.

Answer 6

You married him KNOWING THIS!!!!!!!

He didn't respect your interests back then, WHY WOULD HE NOW???!!!!!

Again, women marry men then expect them to change!!!!  WHY???!!!!!!!

HE WON"T CHANGE!!!  Why don't you tell him to keep his opinions about your intersts to yourself.

Answer 7

This type of person believes that they are superior.  You will never be as good as he.  No one is.  But, you do not have to live this way.  Envision your life  whenever you can and work toward that peace.  It will take time, but it will be bittersweet.

Answer 8

then why'd you marry him?