Do you go home for Christmas, if you're fostered or adopted?

Question

Go back to visit your adopted parents, my friend who fostered 10 children, told me neither of them kept in contact with her, only her biological and stepchildren came back to see them.

Answer 1

If I were fostered or adopted.  Yes, I would go home after all they are the people who thought enough of me, to take me in.  That would be the least I would do.  Happy Holidays.

Answer 2

I'd love to visit my foster carer in the States (but they say I'm not entitled to know who she is!!!)  

I'd love to visit my mother in the States (but they say I'm not entitled to know who she is!!!)

I spend christmas with my adoptive family, we are very close.   My kids do wonder why we aren't allowed to know the rest of our family though!

Answer 3

You are right - this is not a matter of what is fair or unfair.  It is a matter of what you consider family.  

I visit my family for the holidays - that includes extended family and friends that I consider like family.  If I felt my foster parents or adoptive parents were "family", then yes I would visit.  But that is my opinion.

We even visit with my son's bio grandparents for the holidays because they are "family" to him and to us.  We feel that when we adopted our son, we gained more than just a child - we gained a part of our extended family also.

Answer 4

I would it's only fair.

Answer 5

No. My guardian, or foster parent told me to get out of her house the day I turned eighteen. She didn't care where I went, but felt she was no longer responsible for me once I hit that magical number. It was quite a birthday present. We never really were much a family, and I wasn't going back to a place where I was not welcome. Instead I choose to visit friends and coworkers that actually want me around the holidays.

Answer 6

I'm adopted and I don't have any contact with my bio family or my other foster families.  I wish I did but now I only spend Xmas with my adoptive family.  I don't think it's fair that I cant see my bio family at all.  That's my Xmas wish, is that I can spend Xmas with them...I don't think it's going to come true:(

Answer 7

If they raised you well, then you shouldn't have to ask this question. YES!

People that adopt children (esp. at young ages) grow so fond of them, you should visit at xmas for a breif period, say you have a work party so you dont have to stay long. Make sure your all dressed up nicely and well-groomed, so they feel like the did a good job raising & naturing, it'll bring a smile untill the next year. Send them a card. Old people love cards. lol. hope this helped

Answer 8

I spend holidays with both my natural and adoptive parents depending on the year and my finances, my Mom and sister (bio) live rather far away.

My Gran is a retired foster parent and she has one foster daughter who spends holidays with her, she is 20.

Answer 9

Yes, every year.

Answer 10

Nope.My sis went into Foster care and didn't see me for 2 years.And she had her 1st kid at 13.But mostly because she went into foster care cuz she had a drug problem.But other than my circumstances ...hey!I used a big word!.... um they do most of the time.

take care -

bren

Answer 11

i was adopted.. i dont know or want to know my bio whatever you want to call them

i am home with my mom! that is all! she gives me all love and care so i am hanging with my mom!

Answer 12

I visit my adoptive parents.  (Actually, this year, I'll be visiting my in-laws for Christmas.  I'll be with my adoptive family over New Year's.)  I still have a decent relationship with my adoptive family.  They are my family.  (As is my first mother, who I hope to visit on some future holidays.)  I think that this has little to do with being adopted or a foster child (though maybe it is more frequent in such arrangements).  I think it's likely to do with what sort of relationship you have.  After all, some biological children don't visit.

Answer 13

I was adopted and yes I do.

Answer 14

I'm adopted, I keep in contact with my parents through the usual chanels, phone, visits, emails, cards letters, etc.

Luckily I only live around 45 mins away from my parents, so it's not an issue.  Otherwise of course I'd be there for Xmas.  Who else would you spend time with if not your family?

Answer 15

Many foster kids that do not  get adopted do not keep in touch with thier foster parents.  For several reasons the primary reason is that even if it was a good foster home they know the person is not their parent and are not connected to them.  Now adopted kids it depends on when they were adopted and or how they bonded with the family. I have a coworker that adopted two girls and she never sees them.  another who adopted one and she is calls and comes home more than her other bio child

Answer 16

My brother-in-law's parents fostered around 35 kids while he was growing up, and yet only his bio family remains in contact.  Seems like the state funded kids were a way to supplement his preacher father's income. BIL expected my sis to take in kids so they could make their house payment!