Do you have to have a lawyer to adopt or can you do it yourself.?

Question

If there is no father on the birthcertificate and it's been more than a year since he has even contacted us, can I get him for abandonment and let my husband of three years adopt my son. Do I even need a lawyer or can we just fill out the papers ourselves, considering that my husband is a lawyer himself. (not an adoption lawer though)

Answer 1

Your husband should be able to research what is necessary even if he doesn't practice family or adoption law.  He must have at least one contact that can assist with this.

Adoption is a legal proceeding.  You need to insure that you are following the correct laws for your state (or country).  I would highly recommend for your husband to speak to someone in his field to gather the information and also to prevent any "conflict of interest" issues that may arise.  It isn't worth taking the chance to have the adoption termed invalid or illegal.

Answer 2

i am too going through this right now and i was told to get a lawyer just to make sure everything goes smoothly.  i was also told that regardless the biological dad will be contacted and giving the chance to try to stop the adoption.  my daughter was born in 03 and me &my husband got married in 04. with us i know there is a good cause motion for me not going after child support from the state because of the threat of possible physical or emotional harm of me and my kids but the biological dad still needs to be contacted or at least an attempted made.  oh and just because the father is not on the birth certificate does not mean much because neither is my daughter's.  hope this helps.

Answer 3

I would hire a separate attorney just to avoid any potential "conflict of interest" issues.

Answer 4

I don't think its that easy. I do believe you will need a lawyer and you will definitely need the bio fathers permission. Some states require adoption homestudies even for step parent adoption. They need to do background checks to be sure he's not a pervert or abuser.

Answer 5

You should still get an attorney. The boy’s father would have to sign his rights away in order for your husband to adopt him. Since the boys biological father has shown no interest in the child  has not even contacted you for over a year.  I think that will be a plus on your side. If he does not sign you could try to get his rights terminated.

Your husband i suppose could do it if he is a lawyer however it might also be wise to have an outside lawyer.

push comes to shove, your husband clearly is your son's father in all ways that count, and his biolgoical father is just a sperm donor.

Answer 6

If he pays child support then you will need his consent. You can get him for adandonment if he hasn't saw the child in 3 or more months but you have to go to court and have  a lawyer. Don't go around the law it could come back to haunt you.

Answer 7

I think you should seek advice from an attorney. Your husband should be telling you this.

Answer 8

You have to go through a lawyer and court. Adoption is not a do-it-yourself project.  Many judges are ignoring the claimed 'abandonment' because so many women lie. There is no reason why you couldn't hire an investigator to find him to sign relinquishment papers.  

While I sympathize, I also recognize that courts don't take children from mothers who are not supporting them; it should not be the sole reason for writing off the father either.  You obviously picked him to be the father of your child.

Answer 9

I know that a lot of courts will allow a party to represent himself if he is a licensed attorney. However, you are ignoring the biological father and the best interests of the child.

It is not a matter of just "filling out the papers:" this comment suggests that your attorney husband is not familiar enough with family court to represent you three adequately in a very  serious matter.

Your attorney husband will advise you that the primary rule of law is: " A person who represents himself has a fool for a client."

Bottom line - get a lawyer

Answer 10

Get a family lawyer.  It really isn't that expensive, less than $2000 for a simple case, and it will give you peace of mind that everything was done right.

A good family lawyer will...

- Know which judge to use and may even know the judge personally

- Know all of the paperwork that needs to be completed and ensure it is all done correctly

- Take care of the lot of the busy work, like getting certified copies and getting documents to the correct offices

- Know what is required in terms of what to do about the father of the child, including the requirements for attempting to contact them and if the three years of non-contact count as abandonment (and this relates to the first point about knowing the judge)

- Knowledge of any benefits you may or may not be eligible to receive (tax benefits, etc).

Before our adoption, I was bothered that we had to have a lawyer for the adoption (we adopted through the fostercare system).  However, after everything was said and done, I have to admit they earned their fee.  

One last point, GET REFERENCES before you choose a lawyer.