Do you know any women who don't ever want to be a SAHM?

Question

And what are their reasons for NOT wanting to do this?

Answer 1

I know lots of women who don't want to be a SAHM and won't-including myself. I'm 50 so I'm not popping a baby out anytime soon. Why not?

1) Had a violent childhood; didn't want to take a risk that I would be an abusive parent too

2) Took care of my younger siblings so much I feel like I already had kids

3) I love all the careers I've had and the opportunities to do so many of the things I always dreamed about

4) I didn't like marriage-I didn't like how differently people treated me after I married. But I hate traditions and people have very traditional ideas about marriage-unlike myself.

5) I'm happy with my boyfriend and my friends; I did work for short periods of time with kids and I like them but don't want to live with them.

Edit: I agree with another poster-I knew I couldn't stand being at home (I'm way too antsy) and wanted to work with more than a small group of people. But I respect the men and women who do caretake children-it's way too demanding a job for me.

Answer 2

It's interesting how the idea that people decide to be one thing and that's their whole life sorted out is so heavily promoted on this site.

For most of the many people I know through work, socially and by acquaintance of some sort, life is hardly at all like that.

Women attend school, go to university, get a job, pair up with someone, decide to have kids, spend some time at home ~ shorter or longer epending on their personal and family circumstances, go back to work part time or full time, or go back to school and then to work, have another child, etc etc etc

For many women, life isn't a simple straight line ~ get married, get preganant, have a kid or two and stay home caring for them.

Life is a complicated business.

Many women don't want to be a sahm, then get pregnant and do want to, for a while. Then they want to get a job and do that, and then want something else and pursue that.

These days, being one thing all your life is not always enough.

Cheers :-)

Answer 3

me.  the reason is because I've already experienced it and never desire to go down that road to guaranteed brain death again.

Answer 4

I'm one.

To begin with, I don't want kids, or at least not to physically give birth to any. I might adopt; haven't figured that out yet.

I feel that to stay at home when I could be out helping people is a waste of my abilities. I want to become a social worker and help my community, or become a diplomat and help the world-- not become a recluse and help only myself, my kids, and my partner. I am not trying to insult SAHMs because my sister is one, and I think it really works for some people, but it's not my thing at all.

Answer 5

Yes.

It would be stressful, involve tons of work, and mind-numbingly boring.

Answer 6

Er, well that would be practically every woman I know!

I guess most of them have never considered it. And some of them probably couldn't afford it either. It doesn't make financial sense for those that earn a high salary. Most have rewarding careers that they enjoy and wouldn't find staying at home with a kid satisfying enough.

Answer 7

i thought i wouldn't want to be one and then i unexpectedly got pregnant. i still work, and i still go to college, but i wouldn't mind staying home with my son during these early  years. as ambitious as i am, i love him more than work.

i would like to tell my fellow young people not to say they'll never do or want something. you really don't know. life happens and you may just change your mind....

Answer 8

Me. My reasons for not doing this are as follows:

1. I like work too much.

2. I don't want kids.

3. I don't want a husband.

4. I don't want a house.

Answer 9

im young  but i want to be....  only for a couple yearsa though

Answer 10

Well I am currently a SAHM but it's a temporary arrangement. My husband and I decided we want someone to be home for the kids, especially during the first few years. Since he makes more money it only made sense financially speaking for him to be the provider for these years, although he did fight me tooth and nail because he really wanted to stay with the kids.

Anyway, I don't want to be a SAHM forever because I truly enjoy my job and since I am a teacher and our house is never dirty (we're neat freaks and like to make sure things are picked up after we're finished) there really isn't a reason for me to stay at home because without the kids and a house to clean there wouldn't be much else for me to do. Once the kids are in school my job is convenient enough that the kids and I make it home at the same time and I can make sure they get their homework dinner and have dinner on the table by the time my husband gets home at 5:30.

Answer 11

Yes, I know of several.

Generally the reasons tend to be... they don't want to.

Some women find their place is at home with the babbies, doing their part for the generations.  Others think it's out in the workforce doing their part for the nation.

Answer 12

Yes.  Me.  Been there.  Done that.  Not the "gold digging" wonder that some of the posters here think it is.

I got bored, and trying to get all of your validation from one person, my husband, put undue pressure on him.  When he got home he was dead tired, and I was bored out of my skull, lonely and wanting some adult companionship.

Answer 13

Myself. I don't want kids.

Answer 14

I thought hardly anyone wanted to do that nowadays.  Being a stay-at-home-wife is seen as 'oppression' whereas being stuck in an office all day at the beck and call of your employer is seen as 'liberation'.

From what I read on here, I have the impression that the ambition of most women is to be out at work all day, their jobs seem to be the only interest most of them have in their lives.  This appears to be the modern way.