Do you know of any parents that put their kids "on stage"????

Question

Do you know of parents who pretend to be the Parents of the Year by dressing up their kids in the prettiest outfits when friends and family come over to visit, and try to prove to everyone that their kids are the most advanced and the best kids in the entire world, and they demean other parents with their unsolicited advice on raising kids????? I continuously deal with this with one of my friends and it's very very annoying. Do any of you have to deal with this, and/or what are your thoughts????

Answer 1

Absolutely. One of my close friends was really bad with this when she had her son a year after I had mine. I just kind of ignored it, and told her that I don't care if her son was crawling a month before mine, or how many teeth he had at a year old. All kids are special, and take their own time to grow, it doesn't mean that any are better than others.

We grew apart after that, but she has since had a second son, who is a bit slower with his milestones. I think she has realised now that what she was doing was really wrong and unfair and she has cut it out, thank goodness.

I also get it at the playgroup that I take my son to. All the mothers there are constantly comparing their kids, and trying to offer "advice". I just ignore them and play with my kids.

Answer 2

Yup.  I just sit back and shake my head out of pity.  How sad that they have to put on this show to make themselves feel better.  Next time your friend starts in, ask why they feel the need to compete with you!

Answer 3

I've dealt with this a number of times.

The thing for you to know is that this behavior comes from the parent's low self-esteem and tremendous fear that they and their child don't measure up.  The more they try to prove themselves, the more frightened they become.

When you can view these people as the sad creatures they are, and can have compassion for their suffering, your annoyance will go away.

This does not mean, of course, that you must subject yourself to long-winded displays from the parents or child.  Just gently tell the other parents, that you respect their rights to raise their children as they see fit, and you expect the same from them.  Then change the subject.

All the best.