Do you let your children out to play?

Question

My son is 9 and we live in a housing estate. I have not let him out to play with other children so far but find myself under increasing pressure to do so. All other mums seem to but I'm afraid of the traffic, getting up to no good, encouraging "hanging out on street corners" culture. What are your views?

Answer 1

My little girl is 10 and I have just started letting her go out to play.  It really depends where you live I suppose.  We moved in January and where we live now it is suitable for her, but before we lived here it was either not suitable or there were no other children nearby to play with.  I do have strict rules though on times to come in.

My daughter loves to play outside and I think it promotes independence.  

Answer 2

You have got to let go sometime if your kids are going to learn how to socialise outwith the school environment.

Answer 3

I totally understand your concerns but your kid needs to go out and be social!! Its not good for them to just sit in the house all the time!! I mean let him go out and just sit out there and supervise him!! I mean thats what you should be doing anyway!

Answer 4

Depends what sort of area you live in! What the kids are like nearby etc!  

Answer 5

allow it, if you see changes in him, then cut the time. And if that don't help, then don't let him out, and bring his friends over to your house

Answer 6

let ur kid out to play but get to kno who hes playing with like the kids parents and ask what they were doing when he gets back just dont be so into it  

Answer 7

Thank god not only me, I also live in housing estate and under pressure to let my Little boy out to play. I am currently letting him only ply in people garden, with parents keeping eye on him. I also only let him go a few doors up with me watching. Some people Say I being to protective. I would rather that than the opposite which I see often, Good luck I do not think there are any wright or wrong answers. Do what feels right for you both.  

Answer 8

I live in apartments that have very little room for playing (unless you play in the parking lot which I am against). I see other parents letting their kids go out and play unsupervised, but there were also times that I grabbed a 2 yr old by the arm and pulled him up to the sidewalk as cars went by because the "big kids" weren't really keeping an eye on him.

Your kid isn't 2 though. He is 9 and if he is fairly well behaved - at least when it comes to following safety rules, I think you should let him go out and play - but have rules.

If you can afford it, you might get him a pre-paid cell phone (150 minutes per month from net10 for $15) so that you can call and check on him any time that he gets out of your site, or he can call you if he needs something. Set rules such as that he must play in the yard(s) where you can see. Possibly even get a few games and encourage him to have the neighborhood kids over in your yard.

At 9, I think he should be old enough to go out and play but not old enough to leave your site. Let him know that he can't go in anybody's house without asking your permission first, and if he begs or goes in without your permission - he will be grounded for the rest of that day and the next day.

Just sit near a window or on the porch and enjoy a book while he plays. You can look up every couple of minutes to make sure he is still there. ... Or you can take him to a public place like a park to play with other kids.

9 years old is a great age to play with other children. He is old enough to know how to follow basic safety rules and to know what to do if something goes wrong. He is young enough that you can supervise him without the other kids thinking he has a crazy mother. And he is young enough that he will hopefully talk to you about what is going on with himself and his friends. This will give you the opportunity to help him make wise decisions while he is young and that wisdom will carry on into adulthood.  

Answer 9

this is a time when you need to let your child expand his boundaries and gain some independence. If you do not let him play he will not develop the social skills he needs and children will begin to single him out as the "weird" kid.  Place restrictions on where he is to be and how far he can go. check on him. he's old enough to know how to look both ways before crossing a street. place some trust in your child, for you are the one who is teaching him. if you don't trust him then you should take a look as to why you don't trust him. small steps. it'll give him the opportunity to grow and give you time to get things done in the house.

Answer 10

Well my daughter is only 2 so we have not let her out, though I suppose one day we will have to.

When I was about 9-10 years old I was allowed to play out the front but not allowed to cross any roads. I was only allowed as far as down the bottom of the road.

You will know when your son is ready, and you can set the rules to how far he can go, and how long he stays out etc.

Answer 11

We live out of town,but we have several neighbors. My son is 7 and is always wanting to go play with the other kids. I let him. But I set rules and my son follows them. Of course it helps that my son is a well behaved kid and he does listen and follow rules. He knows he has to stay outside and cannot go into the peoples houses.

Set some boundaries for your son and let him choose to follow the rules or get consequences. They have to live and learn.  

Answer 12

I understand your worries, I know our parents let us roam the streets and we are fine, well most of us..haha. But I think I will be just like you when my little one grows up. If you wanna let your go out and play with others, just tell him to have his friends come over to your house, and he plays in your yard only. Meet the friends parents and let them know you are a fully respocible adult and you will pay attention to the boys and make sure they are taken care of (drinks, snacks, staying in safe place). Then all you have to do is look out your window and see them playing. When your son seems trustworthy and mature enough then he can go to the other kids houses but tell their parents he is to stay in their yard only. Then once he is a teen (13) then let him ride his bike or walk to a corner store or park, my little bro does it now, and he is good and calls to check in and tell my mom where he is going at all times. Once he breaks the trust then ground him and tell him it will be a long time before he explores the neighborhood again, so if he wants his freedom then he will abide by your rules with no problems. But I agree with wanting them to be as pure and innocent for as long as possible, kids no days get into too much stuff and break laws just because they are bored..its terrible!