Do you like my poetry?

Question

Here is a few samples,

I hide my face

Hoping no one will see

I keep everything a secret

As if I’m allergic to myself

I’m lost inside the walls I’ve built

Searching for a way out

So I can be who I know I am

_______________

Those words you say

You think they mean nothing

But they remain

Like an everlasting scar

________________

How could I trust you

All you ever did was hurt me

Bruise me and scar me

You say you love me

But how could that be true

You say those words

Not knowing their effect

How they make me feel

What they do inside

Ruining my life

______________________________

I fake my happiness

I hide my true feelings

No one really knows

What its like for me

They think I am alright

That I'll be okay

But thats a lie

I am not alright

I won't be okay

Faking a life thats fine

While inside I'm dying

I hide in my room

So no one sees me cry

No one cares

They just think I'm stupid

If only they knew

There are a few.

Answer 1

Its a little pity party of one--Don't get me wrong I am 30 and I still write poetry like that but I hide it so to speak. Wrap it around words, double meanings, make it more interesting and not one dimensional-So others can relate--You need to widen the audience

Answer 2

This isn't poetry...this is more like angst on paper! It takes a morbid personality to write in this style without a shred of happiness or tranquility. It is dangerous and destructive to feel this way in thought.

Answer 3

Since all the comments so far are pretty destructive and negative themselves, despite generally the posts state how you shouldn't be negative. I personally don't like your poetry, and that's my opinion, but i think that your poetry shows a lot of emotion and that's one of the most important things when you're simply writing to relieve or please yourself with what you can make. Remember, not all poetry is happy go lucky, some of it is dark and depressing, and that's what can make it beautiful. I think that creating more imagery will make your poems better, such as similes and metaphors. Best of luck on future poetry

~sig~

7 days without soccer makes one weak

Answer 4

Frankly, no I don't like it.  It's too "depressed teenager."  Rather typical, really.  Maybe you are a depressed teenager, I don't know...but if you really wanna write some good poetry, write something out of the box, describe this same emotion with words that no one uses, and maybe read some good poetry.  Try reading some Arthur Rimbaud.  He's a french poet.  He wrote some kinda depressing stuff as a teenager, but wrote it like none had ever done before or during his time!  Some of his stuff doesn't make much sense, honestly, but so much is brilliant, and may make a good start for you to figure out how to get outside of the typical stuff!  

I do not criticize when I say this, simply give my opinion.  Please, do not be offended by anything I say.  Whether you take my opinion or not, I do still recommend Rimbaud.  :)